Not Like This
by Martha's pen
Summary: AU: Sparia - Spencer Hastings is still at High School, but decides to take an Art course at Hollis. When she first sees new teacher Aria Montgomery her class soon becomes a lot more interesting.
1. Chapter 1

Not like this...

AU: Sparia - Spencer Hastings enrolls on an art course at Hollis despite opposition from her parents. New teacher Aria Montgomery instantly catches her eye.

xoxo

Chapter 1:

xoxo

Spencer sighed, checking her watch again. It was the first day of her new class and the teacher was late, well not officially, but Spencer preferred the teacher to be present when she arrived, not just to show up when the bell rang like they didn't even care.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting." A young woman breezed into the room, pausing as the bell rang. "My name is Aria Montgomery. Welcome."

Spencer watched with interest as she moved around the room, hanging her coat and placing her purse on the desk. "I'm really excited about this term and getting to know all of you." The woman smiled warmly and Spencer found herself smiling back even though Aria wasn't even looking directly at her. Something about her drew all the attention in the room and Spencer was captivated. When their eyes did meet Spencer felt an unfamiliar pull in her stomach causing her to quickly duck her head. Before she could work out what was going on, the teacher had turned her back and was scrawling her name on the board.

She tried not to think too much about it, after all this class was to be her escape. She worked too hard, spending all her time studying words and numbers. She needed something more and a little extra credit to add to her college applications. She was, of course, a model student and high achiever. It was the least that the Hastings family expected and she'd done her best to live up to those expectations. The idea of making pots and plates had been met with laughter by her Mom, but she persisted. She knew her college applications were excellent, but pretended she needed something more and once the phrase 'exceptional student' had been added to the mix the fee had been paid willingly.

Tapping her pencil on the desk, she listened to Ms Montgomery talking about design and creation. Her eyes never leaving her teacher, she couldn't look away because the woman in front of her lit up as she spoke in a way that Spencer thought was bordering on hypnotic.

xoxo

"Hi." Aria had set them all a task and was now making her way around the room introducing herself personally. Spencer had been so engrossed with her work that she'd not realized it was her turn or that it was already nearing the end of their one hour slot. As if on cue the bell rang and Aria looked at her with a sad smile. "you can finish if you want, I'm working on something so won't be leaving just yet."

"Thanks, I'm not sure it's worth my carrying on though." Spencer looked at her work disparagingly.

"Today is about getting used to clay and...um..." Aria pursed her lips as she looked at the wheel. "Well, I'm not expecting a master piece on day one, next week, however..." Aria laughed and the sound filled Spencer's ears, she knew she was probably staring like a dork right now, but Aria was too busy examining her class list to see. "Spencer?" Aria looked up, a humorous look still in her eye.

Spencer stuck out her hand before embarrassedly pulling it away the second she realized it was covered in clay. "Spencer Hastings."

"Pleased to meet you." Aria offered her hand. "I don't mind the clay, kind of my thing." She joked and Spencer awkwardly shook her hand, a light blush lingering on her cheeks. Even with clay coating her palm she could tell Aria had the softest hands and with that thought, she quickly pulled her hand away.

"OK." the teacher turned around walking back to the front of the class. "So, I'll see the rest of you next week unless you all want to stay and help me clean up?...my emails on the class sheet if you need anything."

The rest of the class filtered out of the door, a soft chorus of voices filled the air and Spencer quickly returned her focus to the piece she'd been trying to make with little success. When she next looked up she noticed her new teacher was watching her curiously.

"I got it on my face didn't I?" Spencer stood up and rushed to the mirror, but there was nothing there.

"You're still at high school?" Aria asked as she began to clean up.

"Yeah, I'm a senior, it's crazy..."

"It's a pretty tough time." Aria sucked a breath between her teeth at the memory. "Do you really have time for my class too? I expect my students to be..._focussed_."

"I've got time." Spencer replied with conviction, she didn't want her teacher chasing her out on day one. So what if she hadn't mastered clay just yet, she was sure she could.

"Good." Aria replied with a smirk. "and I'll let you know if I think you're slacking."

Spencer's eyes bulged, she wasn't sure if the woman was serious or not, but then she saw the mischievous glint in her eye, she pursed her lips, trying not to smile back at her, but knowing she'd failed. She already liked the woman opposite her and was struggling to hide it.

"I'll see you next week. Perhaps you'll be here before the bell like I was?" She responded.

"I like you already Ms Hastings." Aria laughed, clearly not perturbed by her pupils spirit.

"Maybe I'll bring you an apple next week." Spencer smiled, holding Aria's eyes for a second and feeling that pull in her stomach again.

"Hey." A male voice broke the stare off. "you want to get a coffee?" he coughed embarrassedly when he realized they weren't alone. "oh sorry I didn't...um." Spencer looked at the man as he ducked his head, a slight blush on his cheeks that she believed to have more to do with being in the presence of Aria Montgomery, then to do with interrupting her class.

"It's okay, we're just finishing up. Spencer, this is Ezra, he teaches English here."

"Hi." Ezra smiled. "and that's not an easy task when you're Dad is on my back everyday." The man grumbled and Aria laughed, the sound was beginning to hypnotize Spencer, but now this guy was here giving Aria puppy dog eyes and she figured it really was time to go. "So what's your major?" he turned his attention to Spencer.

"Oh, Spencer's at High School." Aria explained before Spencer could open her mouth. She couldn't help but feel awkward and Ezra had clearly no further interest in her. She watched his eyes linger on Aria, but she was almost certain Aria didn't even realize that he was crazy about her.

"I should go, today was...thanks." She waved goodbye to Aria and ducked her head as she grabbed her bag and made her way to the door.

"Have a great weekend." Aria called after her, but she didn't answer. She could hear Ezra's voice booming down the corridor as she made her way to the parking lot. Clutching her folder to her chest, she couldn't help but smile. It looked like this art class was really going to be the perfect escape from her High school life.

xoxo

"Art history? I thought it was just a pottery class." Emily took the book from Spencer's hand, reading the cover and giving it back with disinterest "What have you done with my friend?"

"It's fun, I figured I should read up a little, get a better understanding of how the subject is taught and..." Spencer replied a little too defensively and instantly knew that Emily had picked up on it.

"I want all the details, who is he?"

"Who?"

"The guy on this course of yours that's got you all hot and...oh yeah." Emily laughed when she saw the color of Spencer's cheeks.

"There's no guy. I like art. what's the big?"

"The big what?" Hanna sat down next to Emily, stealing a handful of fries.

"Hey, get your own." Emily slapped her hand away "and the big, is Spencer has a crush, but she's not spilling."

"Oh come on Spence, I need some interesting gossip, things are so dull lately." Hanna ignored Emily's waving hand and helped herself to another, smiling cutely at her success when she put it in her mouth.

"Emily is making up stories in her head. I'm doing an extension course at Hollis and it's kinda cool." Spencer shrugged and watched as Emily nudged Hanna conspiratorially. Food theft forgotten.

"Kinda cool...oh yeah you got someone!" Hanna laughed.

Sometimes Spencer hated having these two as best friends, she couldn't keep anything from them, but there really was nothing to hide here.

Yes, Aria was stunning and Spencer had been thinking about her all week, but it wasn't a thing. She wasn't sure what it was and being attracted to a woman was not something she was about to confess to in the middle of the cafeteria, if thats what it was. "nothing to report." Flustered, she slammed her book shut, but it only made her friends laugh more. Rolling her eyes at the pair, she stood up and quickly made her escape.

"No point keeping secrets from us." Emily called after her, but she didn't turn around.

xoxo

Friday arrived and finally she was back at Hollis. The week had dragged a little, but now all she felt was nervous anticipation. When she walked into the classroom she couldn't hide the smile that filled her face when she noticed Ms Montgomery already sat at her desk.

Delving in her bag she plucked out an apple and placed it next to Aria's notepad, without saying a word she headed to her desk. When she looked up she noticed Aria watching her, a slow smile spreading across her face when she realized Spencer was looking back, picking up the apple and taking a bite, she winked and mouthed 'really good.'

Spencer closed her eyes, trying to ignore the feeling in her stomach that was now bordering on familiar. They snapped open again the moment Aria addressed the class.

"Great to see you all made it back this week. I want to get you to do some work in groups tonight. Yes, I know art is often about the individual, this exercise is just for ideas and so you can get to know each other." She paused. "Then perhaps you'll all want to take me out for a drink after because it's been a long week?" she asked hopefully and was rewarded with a collective cheer from the room. "excellent."

Spencer chewed her lip nervously. The idea of spending time with Aria outside of class had her heart racing. She knew it was probably just a crush, she'd had one before, but something about Aria had her thinking she could get into trouble and what worried her most is that something had her wanting to get into trouble. All kinds of trouble. She sighed and tried to stay focussed on the class, pushing her thoughts aside but unable to keep away from her teacher.

"I can't find the knives?" Spencer walked to the front, waiting for Aria to look up.

"Oh, that was me. Top shelf on the left."

"Thanks." Spencer mumbled, a little put out that her teacher hadn't even looked up at her, just waved her free hand as she continued to sketch.

"You're going to come out with us?" Aria's voice pulled her back around. "You're not much younger than the others...so?" the teacher was now looking at her intensely and Spencer could feel the butterflies in her stomach threatening to explode.

"I was planning on it. Kristen already said she'd give me a ride." She tried to sound cool, but felt anything but.

"You have to promise to stop me if I start to bore them all. I've a habit of talking people to sleep."

"I can't imagine anyone could get tired of listening to you."

"I assure you they do, but that's sweet of you to say."

Spencer blushed a little. "I better, um, knives." She stuttered, amazed at how the short little brunette had such an effect on her.

"Knives." Aria grinned and Spencer felt her heart lift when it reached her eyes.

xoxo

The class was soon over and the group made their way to the local bar. As they walked through the door Aria gripped her arm and led her to a table. "I can't let you drink." She whispered. "Or at least I can't see you do it."

"I think I can resist tonight." Spencer smiled, not sure she could resist anything when Aria's fingers were touching her bare skin, but before she could say another word, Aria let go and joined the others at the bar. Leaving Spencer to catch her breath.

An hour later and the drinks were in full flow, Spencer had taken a beer and noticed Aria turn her back. It was fun and she was enjoying getting to know her new classmates, but her eyes kept flitting to her teacher. For a moment she lost sight of her in the crowded room and then she felt a shiver as someone stepped close behind her, she didn't have to look to know who it was, she already recognised her perfume.

"I thought Kristen was your ride?" Aria whispered into her ear, before taking the seat next to her.

"Apparently just for the way here." Spencer explained unnecessarily as they watched Kristen down another shot of tequila and grab hold of Alex, leading him onto the dance floor.

"And I thought you could resist?" Aria eyed the drink on the table knowingly.

"I'm weak." Spencer nodded, not caring that she'd given in tonight, she'd needed some distraction.

"I find that hard to believe." Aria studied her for a moment, as if she was about to say something, but then she shook her head and smiled a smile that had Spencer's heart fluttering. "I'll take you home."

"Really you don't have to. I can call my Mom...or..."

"It's fine, I feel kind of responsible. Hastings right? You're Melissa's sister."

"You know Melissa?"

"From school." Aria nodded. "She's the kind of girl everyone knew."

"That's my sister." Spencer sighed. "But if you were at school with Melissa...I, uh, it's just you seem too young to be a teacher?"

"Just old enough. I guess I think of myself as an artist really. Teaching pays the bills. It's fun and...well I just want my students to feel the same passion I do." She shrugged and Spencer thought it was possibly the most adorable thing she'd ever seen.

"You're an excellent teacher." Spencer answered a little too quickly, her words laced with meaning. Aria tilted her head to one side and examined Spencer thoughtfully.

"You're too nice to me."

"I'm an excellent judge of character and I'm always right, so don't worry."

"Thank you. You're different."

"Is that a compliment?"

"Yeah, yeah it is." Aria said softly. "you ready to go? Kristen will keep the others entertained."

xoxo

Spencer tried to focus on the road as Aria drove them home, but she couldn't help but glance sideways at the woman next to her.

"You want to get something to eat?" Aria pulled up at the drive thru without waiting for Spencer's response. "I'm starved."

"Me too." Spencer laughed. She found that she loved the spontaneity of the woman she'd just met. Aria ordered for them both, not even asking Spencer what she wanted. Before pulling up and handing her a burger.

"Here."

"You always order for people?"

"I do when I know this is the best burger in town and only a fool would refuse it."

Spencer eyed her curiously, unwrapping the paper and taking a bite, chewing happily and nodding when she realized how right the other woman was. "damn, that's so good!"

"You just have to trust me Spencer."

"I do." Spencer's eyes flicked up to meet Aria's. A soft smile forming at her teacher's mouth and Spencer thought perhaps that was her new favorite smile. They sat like that for a few minutes, eating, talking. Every time their eyes connected, Spencer felt a jolt. She wasn't sure if Aria had any idea, but when she took her trash, their hands brushed and for the briefest second she could have sworn Aria had shivered.

The drive back to the Hasting's was quiet and over all too quickly for Spencer's liking.

"I'll see you next week."

"Yeah, night Miss Montgomery."

"Night Miss Hastings! You're making me feel old, from now on you call me Aria."

"Thank you, Aria. Tonight was fun."

"It was." Aria smiled at her wistfully and Spencer made her way towards her front door. She watched as the older woman drove away. She'd never met anyone quite like her, talk came easy, silence was comfortable. She wasn't sure what it all meant, but she did know she needed to find a way to spend more time with Aria Montgomery and class next week suddenly seemed all too far away.

xoxo


	2. Chapter 2

Note: Just a quick note to say thanks for the comments. I've got a lot of this story drafted out and my aim is to try to update every 7 to 10 days if possible.

* * *

Chapter 2:

xoxo

Aria went straight from Spencer's house to her parents home and dropped her bags on the floor with a thud. She really was too old to be doing this, living under their roof was becoming stifling.

She longed for some independence and her own place, but she was only too aware that being a struggling artist seemed to mostly involve the word struggling. Her cause wasn't helped by the fact that she'd married against her parents wishes whilst at college and, of course, true to her parents expectation the marriage ended early. On top of that he'd taken every cent she had. Something her mother had a habit of reminding her about whenever she picked up the paper and dared to look for her own apartment. She didn't have the money, not yet anyway. All she had was the help her parents offered and she tried her best to be grateful, but it wasn't easy.

Moving back to Rosewood had been okay at first, but she missed her own world and her own rules. She definitely didn't miss Jake. Things hadn't been right with him, but she'd tried to make it work, mostly because her parents seemed so sure it wouldn't. She hated them being right. They always seemed to be right! Now she was teaching in a bid to rebuild her life. Her art was on hold and sometimes she felt like her whole life was too and then this girl walked into her class and something changed. She was smiling and it felt good.

"Aria, that you?" Her Mom peered her head around the door, breaking Aria's train of thought and reminding her where she was. "how was class?"

"Good. Great actually. I've got myself a work in progress, you might know her. Spencer Hastings?" she couldn't resist the opportunity to talk about her new student.

"Almost as talented as her older sister. Now Melissa." Ella smiled at the thought. "she really was the best student I've ever had. Spencer? She's a little less focussed, I guess that shows."

"Why because she's taking my art class?" Aria snapped a little defensively, finding it hard not to be irritated by her Mother's attitude towards her career.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Yes, you did." Aria replied flatly. "I can't forget Melissa. I remember how amazing you thought she was. Every night at dinner you went on about how you wished I could be more like her. It's not really what a teenage girl needs to hear."

"Aria." Ella placed her hands on her hips and stared at her daughter in disbelief, but Aria wasn't stopping. "You know I wouldn't have meant that. I love you. I was probably just making a point about your lack of focus, you could be so...so _flighty_."

"We can't all be straight A students Mom. Anyway, I like Spencer, she has a lot of spirit and don't think you know the real Melissa because she gave you a perfect smile and got perfect grades. From what I've seen, Spencer is ten times the girl her sister could ever be." Aria was shocked at how defensive she felt towards the girl she'd only met the week before, but she reasoned that she was so fed up of her Mom and her life right now that she needed to lash out.

"Aria, I don't know why you're being so difficult."

"I'm not being difficult, I just don't happen to agree with you." Her stern reply was met with a sigh from Ella.

"Okay." Her Mom held her hands up in defeat, but her face told a different story. "can I get you something to eat?"

"No, I'm good." Aria was left cringing at the way her behavior regressed to that of a teenager whenever she closed that front door.

"And did you see Ezra today?" her Mom pretended to ask innocently in an attempt to change the subject but Aria knew only too well what that question led to, it had been the same every night this week.

"I did, he says Hi. No, I'm not dating him again. Yes, he still wants to. No, I won't reconsider. That cover everything?" her tone more resigned then angry, she wanted it all to stop.

"You need to date, it'll do you good. You can't sit around here your whole life."

"I don't plan to. Right now I need to work."

"Oh really! So what was tonight?" Ella eyed her curiously.

"I took the class out. It was socializing. What you also want for me, right?"

"I just want you to be happy."

"So long as happy involves Ezra and grandchildren right?"

"Why are you always like this?" Ella sighed again and it was too much. Aria knew she'd been hard on her Mom.

"Sorry, I'm tired." Aria sucked in a deep breath. She didn't need this fight, not now. "I had a long day and...I should get some sleep."

"It's okay, I know how hard it is when you first start teaching, honestly it'll get easier."

"Thanks Mom."

Accepting the easy path out she kissed her Mom's cheek and finally found sanctity in her room. Pulling out her sketch book she began to draw. It was her only real release when she needed to escape from the inner workings of her mind.

When she finished she looked at the page in front of her thoughtfully. Spencer Hastings face stared back at her, she'd captured her features perfectly. A smile crept across her face when she realized it was actually the best thing she'd drawn in a while. Choosing not to dwell on the fact that it was Spencer, reasoning that she'd enjoyed the girls company tonight and that it made sense she'd draw her, she climbed into bed and gave into sleep.

xoxo

Aria woke with a sense of relief, Saturday was her day. Her Mom, Dad and Mike all left early. They had their things and her return didn't change it and for that she was eternally grateful.

Every Saturday she woke feeling rested. There was nothing to rush to and no one to exchange words with over breakfast. For the first time in weeks she attacked her work. The sketch from the night before smiling back up at her seemed to set her inspiration on fire.

Her paints got an outing, the colors worked together and when she stood up she smiled at what she saw. It wasn't another portrait of the girl that seemed to fill her thoughts, but it was credit to her, she couldn't deny that. She was already thinking about how to say thank you when they next had class, but Friday seemed so far off right now and soon she was lost again in her work.

Checking her alarm clock she realized she'd skipped breakfast and lunch. Her stomach growled on cue, so she cleaned up and decided it was time to get out. She loved to draw and adored painting, but she had lacked inspiration and a muse for so long.

Now she had found a spark again, her work this morning had been intense and it scared her a little that it came in the form of her slightly dorky student, but mostly it left her feeling invigorated.

xoxo

Getting out of the car she fumbled to store her keys in her purse as she walked along the empty sidewalk.

"Hey." She jumped when she heard a voice behind her. Turning she was met with the girl she'd just been thinking about.

"Spencer." She fidgeted with her keys nervously. Not sure when she became so awkward. Spencer was a student, her student, nothing to be awkward about.

"You okay?" Spencer's smile was replaced with a frown. "you've got..." a hand reached out and moved towards Aria's face, she didn't move. Her whole world stopped as the taller girl brushed her thumb lightly across her cheek. Spencer's eyes were focussed on whatever it was she was wiping away, but Aria's were locked on her. When Spencer finished and looked in her eyes, Aria quickly dropped her gaze.

"I need to um..."

"Did I do something?" Spencer asked a little startled by Aria's strange behavior.

"NO." Aria shouted and spun back around, she was being rude and the way Spencer's tone had changed made her feel awful. "No." she repeated a little softer this time, stepping back towards the girl. "I need food! And I get grumpy when I'm hungry, I've not had a thing since last night and my stomach is growling _so_ loud I expect you can hear it."

Spencer laughed and then looked at her watch, gasping when she realized the time "It's 3pm!" she said with a frown. "come on." She hooked her arm in Aria's as if it was completely natural. "you took me for the best burger, now I'm taking you for the best pizza."

"Spencer, you really don't have to." Aria failed in her protest, the warmth of where Spencer's hand rested on her arm distracting her as her stomach continued to growl for food.

"I do. I'm not letting a friend of mine die of starvation."

Aria laughed lightly, it felt good that Spencer already thought of them as friends. She really didn't have all that many since she'd moved back.

She'd have described Ezra as a friend, but she wasn't blind to the fact he wanted more. She also wasn't oblivious to the fondness she could already see in Spencer's eyes when she looked at her, but she wasn't ready to think more on that. For now they could be friends getting some lunch, even if it was the middle of the afternoon.

"This really is the best pizza." Aria nodded her agreement as she took another mouthful.

"I'm glad you share my love of food."

"I bought you the burger first." Aria countered.

"True, but I've a lot more for you to try."

Aria smiled warmly, their implied future sounded good. "I'll get fat."

"You'd never get fat, I'll take you running."

"No." Aria's eyes bulged as she shook her head.

"What? It's good to keep fit. I play hockey, you should come watch."

"Maybe I will, but I'm not running. It's all hot and sweaty and public."

"So you do hot and sweaty in private?" Spencer joked and then blushed at what she'd just said. "um."

"Um." Aria smirked, sucking her lips between her teeth in an attempt to stop herself smiling at the blushing girl in front of her.

"You've been painting...the smudge..." Spencer desperately tried to change the subject.

"I have. Actually I've had an amazing morning." Aria grinned uncontrollably. She felt good about her painting and even better now. She was so at ease with Spencer and it felt nice to have some company for a change.

"So that's why you skipped lunch?"

"Yeah, I found some inspiration." She looked up and locked eyes with the younger girl for a moment. She could feel a flutter in her chest as Spencer's smile shone back at her.

"I'm about to go to the exhibition around the corner, it's meant to be really...hey, do you want to come? It's research for class, but I guess you've been already?" Spencer was turning red as she spoke, clearly awkward about asking Aria to join her. Aria just smiled softly and placed her hand on top of Spencer's, stopping her from rambling.

"I'd love to go."

"You would?" Spencer's look of astonishment made Aria laugh. The girl was so enchanting.

"I was planning to go this weekend anyway, so why not now?"

She watched as Spencer's face lit up in excitement, finding it slightly adorable and then quickly pushing that thought to one side as they settled the bill.

xoxo

"Your Mom doesn't like me much." Spencer was busy looking at a sculpture. Aria found that she was a little too busy just watching her and the way the younger girl seemed to absorb everything she looked at. It was magical to see someone so into the things she loved, so magical that she'd barely taken in any of the exhibition or noticed any of their surroundings.

"Why would you say that?" she shook her head, knocked out of her daze.

"Because she's stood over there scowling at me."

"Oh." Aria stopped staring at the taller girl and sure enough there was her Mom watching them both. Her emotions changing rapidly. She'd been content, then felt something akin to guilt, which she quickly pushed aside and replaced with rage. "why is she even here?" she growled between clenched teeth.

"I'll go, it doesn't have to be a thing." Spencer stepped away.

"No, it is a thing. Come on." Aria took Spencer's arm and marched towards an unsuspecting Ella. "Mom, you know Spencer?"

"Aria." Ella nodded at her daughter. "lovely to see you Spencer. Are you here with your family?"

"No, I...we...lunch and then I was..." Spencer seemed to be fascinated with the floor suddenly and Aria caught herself watching her again before she realized her Mom's eyes were firmly focussed on them both.

"She came with me." Aria said with purpose, but her Mom's look made her wobble. "we ran into each other and yeah, its for the class or..."

"So your other students are here?" Ella pretended to look around the room, but Aria knew she already knew the answer to that question.

"I expect they're still recovering." Spencer scoffed remembering the state of Kristen the night before.

"You took you're students drinking and you let a minor go to?" Ella rolled her eyes in disbelief. "you better hope the Dean doesn't hear or Spencer's parents for that matter."

"It wasn't like that." Spencer began to protest, but Aria stopped her, gripping her forearm lightly.

"Goodbye Mom, I'll see you tonight. Spencer and I have art to see."

Ella narrowed her eyes at her daughter but didn't say another word. Aria didn't see the big deal, her Mom was just being difficult, it seemed to be her favorite past time lately.

"I told you she didn't like me." Spencer whispered with a giggle as they quickly made an exit.

"She doesn't like anyone at the moment, only Ezra."

"Oh."

"No 'oh' about it. He's a friend. We dated. Mom wants me to get married again and settle down. Usual stuff."

"You don't have to explain."

"I know." Aria smiled and Spencer returned it with interest. "you want to get out of here? My Mom will probably hide behind the statues spying on us if we stay."

"I know just the place."

Aria let Spencer lead the way, finding it easy to just go with it. She didn't want to think, she just wanted to feel and right now she felt happy and free. That was enough.

xoxo

"This is you're home." Aria stopped in the doorway, unsure if she should go in or not.

"Yep." Spencer nodded "and its full of popcorn, movies and not a single parent in sight..."

If Aria had been a student at the high school then it would have been perfectly normal to go in there, to watch movies, to hang out with the girl that was now smiling at her innocently. But she was the teacher, she was Spencer's teacher and perhaps that smile wasn't so innocent and perhaps her own thoughts weren't so clear anymore.

"Actually I should really get home, you know I've my work and..." She stepped back awkwardly. Her earlier defiance had evaporated now her Mom was out of sight and although she liked Spencer she also knew that going into that house right now wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be right because she wasn't sure what she was doing anymore.

"It's okay." Spencer tried to stop her, but Aria hated the fact that the smile was gone and now she saw sadness.

"Another time though. It'd be fun." She knew she shouldn't have promised that, but she also knew she wanted to do it, she wanted it to still be a possibility. Not spending time with Spencer just wasn't an option.

"See you in class." Spencer nodded, apparently satisfied with Aria's promise for another time. "I hope the painting goes well and thanks for today. I had a really good time." Spencer's smile returned and Aria held her gaze for a second.

"Me too. Really! You're great company." Aria half smiled and headed back to her car.

Opening the door slowly, she climbed in. For a moment she just sat there, her head resting on the steering wheel, trying to gather her thoughts, her breathing had steadied but she couldn't clear her head. Eventually she gave in and started the engine. Looking in her mirror, she saw Spencer watching as she drove off and again felt sad that she'd chosen not to go in.

xoxo


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

xoxo

"Can you get your head out of that book for one-second?" Emily whined, Spencer clenched her jaw as she looked up irritated.

"What's so important?"

"My life Spencer! Just my life and I need my best friend and you're so into all this." Emily looked at the book cover with distain and sighed heavily. "really? This has got to be one hot guy."

"Just tell me what's so important." Spencer folded her arms across her chest, tilting her head to one side and pursing her lips. Making sure Emily knew she didn't really want to do this.

"Fine." Emily sat down next to her. "I've got this English test and Ms Montgomery is being a bitch." At that name Emily had Spencer's attention.

"She doesn't like me much either."

"Normally she's cool, but this week...ugh...I need your help. Study date?"

"You're on. Come over after my art class?"

"Thanks Spence."

Spencer was already back to her book. She wasn't really reading it. Her thoughts were all about Aria, they had been since last Saturday.

Hanging out together had been fun. She found the woman interesting, funny, pretty and she knew she was getting lost in her, but she didn't want to stop, she was happy to be lost because it felt so good.

She'd watched from the window as Aria sat in her car last Saturday night. There was no doubt they had a connection, but it was clear Aria felt the need to keep a distance and Spencer wished that she didn't. She'd happily spend everyday with her, seeing that smile made her feel warm inside, she couldn't get enough, but their lives didn't work that way and she had no way of seeing her outside of her college class unless she accidentally bumped into her again.

She knew the only way to get any answers and to make sense of what she was feeling was to spend more time with Aria. She wanted to know her better, to understand what it was she felt for her. She knew they could become great friends at the very least, yet she couldn't deny she longed for something more. She was fascinated by Aria. Her smile, the ease of their conversations and she couldn't deny she'd found herself staring at her lips more than once, idly wondering...

"Hey, come back to me Spence." Emily nudged her playfully.

"Sorry." She put the book down. "you want to get a coffee?" The next hour flew by as she listened to her friend talk about school and her life. It was the perfect distraction, but every now and then she found her thoughts returning to Aria.

xoxo

When the week finally came to an end, Spencer couldn't get to the college quickly enough. The campus was beautiful, she preferred it to High School for sure. Her enthusiasm led her to be almost half an hour early. Picking up a coffee she took a walk under the trees, finding a bench she sat down and watched all the students as they made their way to class.

When she saw Aria in the crowd, a smiled filled her face. She tried to bite it back, but then her teacher turned her head and their eyes connected. She felt the same rush, but she also noticed the smile on the other woman's face and it blew her away, she could only imagine it was similar to her own. As if pulled by a magnet she got off the bench and jogged towards her.

"Hey, you're early." Aria greeted her warmly which was a relief after her sudden departure the other night.

"I like to make a good impression, remember?"

"You're really not failing on that." Aria winked and Spencer blushed. "come on, you can help me set up."

Spencer fell in line, walking to class with that ridiculous smile filling her face, but it felt good, she felt like she was meant to be here, doing this. Spending time with this woman that she had an intense connection with. Spencer liked her, she couldn't fight it, she didn't want to. She wasn't sure she could if she had to.

xoxo

Aria couldn't stop smiling either, she found Spencer's company infectious. Despite her attempts to not think of the younger girl, she found herself doing nothing but for the best part of the week. The moment she saw her sat on the bench she knew she couldn't just shut herself away. Being around Spencer made her feel happy.

"Did you get much done?" Spencer asked as they walked into the classroom.

"My painting?" Spencer nodded. "Yes. I've been lost in work all week." Aria's face lit up at the thought of it.

"So the exhibition helped? I'm glad we went, I really enjoyed it."

"The exhibition." Aria nodded, clutching her bag tightly. Inside was a sketch pad that gave away her true inspiration. She didn't need it right now because that person was stood in front of her smiling her prettiest smile and she knew it was wrong, that feeling like this for a student shouldn't happen, but with Spencer it just seemed impossible to fight it, besides she was just looking. It wasn't a thing unless she let it become a thing, that was the mantra she'd been repeating to herself all week, but now they were together again and all her restraint seemed to vanish.

"Do you want to get coffee after class?" Spencer looked at her hopefully, Aria couldn't miss it. She noticed the cup in the girls hand and wondered just how much coffee she drank.

"I'd...yeah coffee." Aria nodded, taking a sharp intake of breath, this was definitely bordering on a thing but she couldn't say no to something she wanted. Coffee on a friday night could happen and her inner conflict could wait until Saturday morning.

xoxo

Spencer was grateful that the next hour passed fast. She'd tried to focus on her pottery, but mainly her eyes had been on the teacher as she moved around the class. Occasionally their eyes would meet and Aria would smile or look away shyly, she couldn't describe it as anything other than adorable.

When the room cleared, Spencer stood and made her way towards Aria's desk, she waited as the older woman cleared away her things and just as she was about to look up a voice broke the comfortable silence.

"God Spence do you really hang out late here too?" Two heads turned towards the doorway only to see Emily Fields there, watching them curiously.

"I'm, uh, why are you here?" she rounded on her friend confusedly, this is not what she expected at all.

"Study date remember! I thought I'd catch you after class and make the most of our time together. Plus I've got to admit, I wanted to check out what it is that has you so absorbed." Emily stepped into the room, drinking in her surroundings, but finding little of interest.

"You really didn't need to. I have my own car."

"I know, but I can follow you. We can get pizza. I've a lot to do if that Montgomery witch has her way."

"I?" Aria had felt completely surplus to the conversation until this point, but now she was intrigued as to how this strange girl knew her.

"You're Mom." Spencer put her hand on Aria's shoulder to explain, but it only made the shorter woman's heart race, causing her to step back awkwardly.

"Her what?" Emily eyed the encounter suspiciously.

"Emily, this is Miss Montgomery, Aria. She's Mrs Mon..."

"I get it." Emily put her hand up, stopping Spencer's unnecessary explanation. She was much more interested in the other woman now. "really? Well, you're way better looking, is she nice?" She turned to Spencer, nodding her approval and Spencer quickly realized what she was doing. Her friend was checking out her teacher and she couldn't have that. She smacked her on the arm.

"We're going." She grabbed Emily and dragged her out of the door, leaving a very perplexed Aria behind.

"Chill will you." Emily growled, rubbing the spot where Spencer had caught her.

"Why would you show up here?" Spencer spat through gritted teeth.

"Because you were hiding something and now I see it's a hot art teacher."

"Drop it Em."

"Fine." Emily huffed, breaking free of Spencer's grip and making her way to her car. "but you promised me a study date!"

Spencer looked back to see Aria watching the pair from the classroom door. She looked at her sadly. Itching to run back to her, but then Emily called out again. So she sadly waved goodbye.

xoxo

"Em, you've got to read the text. I can't help if you don't."

"What's it look like I'm doing?"

"It looks like you are moaning and doing your best to just stuff your head full of answers that are in my brain without even reading it."

"Fine." Emily picked up the book, narrowing her eyes at her friend. Annoyed that Spencer always caught her out.

"I'm going to get us something to eat."

"I thought we'd have pizza?"

"Yeah and I thought you'd read this!" Spencer raised her eyebrow and Emily sunk back in her chair. "I found the best burger in Rosewood. I'll be back soon, well actually I'll be gone long enough for you to read that uninterrupted." She picked up her keys, tapping Emily softly on the head on her way out.

This really hadn't been what she wanted to do. Emily was slacking and Spencer had missed out on the chance of coffee with Aria because of it. She couldn't walk around Rosewood tomorrow in hope that she might bump into her, but she probably would give it a shot.

Cursing herself for not having any other form of contact but their weekly class, she drove to the burger place Aria had taken her. Taking her time in a hope that Emily would actually read some of the text before her return. On her way back she stopped at the red light. Something caught her eye and she found herself staring into the window of a quaint restaurant, it looked so warm and cozy and then she saw her. Aria, laughing freely. Spencer got lost in watching her for a moment, she considered parking up and finding a reason to go inside, but before she could form a plan of what to say, she saw Ezra. Even from her car she could see the way he looked adoringly at Aria and it made her feel sick when she saw the way Aria smiled back. The light turned green and the car behind her got impatient and beeped, so she sped away quickly before the occupants of table 7 turned to see her.

xoxo

Spencer was still shaking a little when she walked back into her house, but Emily didn't seem to notice as she examined her food.

"This better be good." Emily sat back on the couch and took a bite. Spencer just stared out the window, her appetite lost. "whoa. Okay so what's up now?"

"Nothing."

"Then can I have yours? I mean you're just picking at it and it seems such a waste."

"Go ahead. Then be ready because I'm going to test you." Spencer stared at Emily, deciding she needed to stop thinking about Aria, she grabbed her burger back and took a bite. Remembering how good it was and didn't give it back. "what? You'd get fat." She shrugged.

Emily didn't look amused, but they got back to studying and Spencer did her best to focus on her friend, suddenly truly grateful to have her company tonight.

xoxo

Aria didn't say a word on the way home, they'd had a fun night and she even let Ezra walk her to the door. He'd shown up at her classroom a few minutes after Spencer's departure and caught her at a weak moment, sitting behind her desk, her head a complete mess.

The girl that had collected Spencer was pretty and she was the same age and now Aria was wondering why that thought kept racing through her head. When Ezra's head peered round the door, she smiled. He was right there offering her an out and she decided to take it. She was a little surprised at his choice of restaurant. It was very romantic and a quick bite after work was beginning to feel like a date, but she didn't stop it. It was her, it was him and it wasn't the girl that filled her thoughts for the past few days. Perhaps this was the right thing to do. She helped herself to wine and tried to forget.

The food was surprisingly good and Ezra, as ever, was good company. She idly wondered what it'd be like if she was into him. She looked at him thoughtfully, but nothing happened, her heart didn't skip a beat, her skin didn't tingle. She heard a car horn on the street outside and it woke her from her thoughts. When she turned all she saw was her reflection in the window, hers and Ezra's and she knew it was time to go home. The charade had to end before she hurt him.

Yet, as if back in her earlier daze, she let him walk her towards the door. Imagining her Mom on the other side, holding her breath, hoping for that moment. She stopped and looked at him sadly, not sure what she was going to say, but he must have misread her expression and lifted his hand towards her cheek. Alarmed she backed away quickly.

"Good night." She turned and fumbled to get her key in the lock, suddenly desperate to get away.

"Aria, wait." He reached out and gently took her wrist, his fingers lightly brushing against her skin. She sucked in a deep breath and slowly turned to look at him.

"Ezra, I like you, but I can't...I mean...we..." she dropped her gaze when she saw the confusion on his face. "tonight was fun. You're a good friend." She said softly.

"A friend?" he mashed his lips together and she knew it'd hurt him.

"Yes, a friend. I'd like that. I can't be anything more. It's complicated and I think, look it's not..."

"Not me, it's you?" he quipped.

"Yeah." She sighed, looking at him sorrowfully. "I need a friend." She added with sincerity and he nodded slowly. Taking a moment before looking back up at her.

"I'll see you Monday." He half smiled and she knew he'd pretend she'd not hurt him. Glad he'd still pretend he was okay with friendship. She watched him drive away and hoped he'd find someone soon. Someone that could love him because now she knew she never could.

Everything had changed and she wasn't sure how she was going to deal with it because ever since Jake she hadn't been able to trust her heart and all of a sudden Spencer Hastings walked into her life and she was struggling to make sense of anything all over again. Walking into the house she was relieved the other occupants were already in bed. Making her way to her room she dropped her bags on her bed and pulled out the sketch of Spencer. Wishing they'd made it out for that coffee, she wanted to know this girl more, she needed to know what it was that had her so intrigued. Instead she was left with a long list of doubts and all she really knew was that it'd be another week until she saw her again.


	4. Chapter 4

xoxo

Note: Mistakes are mine. Hope you're still reading.

Chapter 4:

xoxo

Spencer didn't magically bump into Aria that weekend and she didn't go looking for her either after what she'd seen through that restaurant window. Instead she ran, trained and worked. She did her best not to acknowledge it, but for the last month her whole week built to that Friday class. It already felt like she'd known Aria so much longer, only now a little bit of her wished she could stop thinking about the teacher that set her pulse racing whenever she saw her. It was getting too much. Her thoughts consumed with someone so out of her reach, someone she knew she shouldn't be so carried away with, but it was getting too hard to resist. When her week came to an end she wondered where it had gone. Class had been easy, Emily had been quiet and now it was time to make her way across Rosewood.

Yet, returning to Hollis didn't feel so good today, in fact she walked onto the campus and felt her heart ache the way it had the moment she saw them together last Friday night. She wasn't early today. Her feet didn't want to move as she stood back in the courtyard taking in her surroundings. The beauty seemed to have faded in just one week and she wasn't sure if it was just her eyes or if the seasons had changed.

Taking a deep breath and pulling her shoulders back just a little, Spencer walked slowly into class exactly on the hour mark, not looking towards her teacher as she made her way to her usual seat. She could feel eyes on her and finally looked up to see Aria watching her, a slightly perplexed look gracing her features. It made her suck in a shaky breath. Still in awe of the woman and the effect being in the same room had on her.

"Hi, everyone. I'm glad you all came back." Aria's eyes met Spencer's again, a soft smile pulling at the corners of her mouth, before she continued. "Tonight I want you to carry on with your projects, if we can all get something ready to be fired at the end of the session it would be awesome and because that's a lot to ask I want you to work together."

She walked around the class, setting everyone off and Spencer watched and waited but nothing.

"Ms Montgomery?" she looked up when Aria walked back to her desk without saying anything.

"You're with me." Aria turned back and made her way towards Spencer, her sketchbook in hand. The class paid them no attention, they were an odd number and Spencer was the youngest, why would anyone look. "I sketched some designs and wanted to see if you could follow them. I'll help."

"Really?"

"Yes, Spencer, really. Can you do that?" she quirked her eyebrow amusedly and Spencer clenched her jaw, setting into the task. Of course she could do this. Whatever Aria had planned, she'd show her she could do it.

"I..." Spencer started but stopped again, she didn't really know what she wanted to say.

"Emily seemed like a nice girl. Are you close?" Aria half questioned.

"Yes, um yeah, since forever, school and..." Spencer nervously ran her hands down the wet clay.

"If you do it like this..." Aria's hands moved deftly over hers, moving them gently up and down as the wheel spun, shaping the clay with each movement. Her touch was soft and tender. The way the wheel spun was quite hypnotic and Spencer thought she'd have spaced out if she hadn't felt the older women's breath ghosting across her neck.

"Thanks." Her voice breathy and a little shaky was enough to make Aria stop. Letting go suddenly and leaving a cold shadow on her skin from where the touch was lost.

"And you've known Emily a while?" Aria returned to her original tack, clearly keen to find out more. If Spencer thought it was odd, she didn't show it.

"Best friends for years. She's cool, kind of annoying and sucks at English. Thinks you're Mom has it in for her."

"So it was study? Right of course. I thought, well she is...and you, my Mom told me..." Aria stuttered and Spencer knew full well what Aria's Mom had told her. A smile filled her face as she watched her teacher try to form words.

"Emily only wants me for my brains, you don't have to worry." She knew what she was saying, the innuendo was obvious and she watched purposefully for Aria's reaction.

"That's really good." Aria nodded and then purposely pointed to Spencer's work, changing the subject. "here." She showed her the sketch she'd made and Spencer was shocked.

"You're really talented."

"Thank you. I...uh...do you want? Look I was thinking..." Aria was flustered again, but as endearing as it could have been, Spencer couldn't hold her own issues in any longer

"I saw you." She blurted out suddenly. Shocking the woman next to her.

"I'm sorry?" Aria's face was a picture of confusion and it took Spencer a moment to calm her now racing heart before she could continue.

"I went out for food last week and saw you and Ezra. I guess I'm happy you decided to give him a shot or something." She shrugged, trying to portray nonchalance when all she felt was something close to jealousy and resentment.

"Or something." Aria spoke softly and waited for Spencer to look up and meet her eyes before nodding her head lightly as if to confirm her words. "We're friends."

"It's not a thing?" Spencer swallowed thickly, aware her questioning and behavior had crossed a line, but unable to care about going back now.

"No, definitely not a thing. We're...he's a friend, that's it. He showed up after you..." Aria closed her eyes and chewed on her bottom lip. "Not now okay? I should..." she stood up and went back to the front of the class, unable to say anymore because she wasn't sure where it would end up.

Spencer didn't care that she was blatantly staring at her teacher for the rest of the class, she couldn't wait for it to end, when it did and the room eventually emptied she moved to the front of the room, sitting back on the edge of the table top in front of Aria's desk.

"That coffee?" she asked hopefully.

"Yeah." Aria smiled softly with her eyes and Spencer felt like a million butterflies exploded in her stomach with that look. "I'd like that."

xoxo

With a slightly steadier heartbeat she opened the door to the coffee shop "I didn't mean to pry."

"You did." Aria giggled.

"So maybe I did, but you said it wasn't a thing and then I saw you both eating and..." she stopped herself the moment she realized she was beginning to sound like a jealous teenager, perhaps because she actually was one, but right now she was with this woman and she didn't want to mess it up again. She just prayed Emily didn't miraculously appear from the shadows and interrupt them again.

"Ezra and I..."

Spencer stopped Aria by raising her hand, she wasn't ready to hear this. "It's not my business. You get a seat I'll get the coffee."

When she made her way to the table she noticed that Aria was still watching her intently.

"You did really well today, your work, I think you're very talented."

"It's fun." Spencer shrugged.

"Fun? So not a serious option for you?"

"Not really the Hastings way. I fought to get into your class. There are expectations."

"I'd have thought you're happiness was the most important thing?" Aria half shrugged.

"I'm too clever to be artistic. That's the way it is."

"That's kind of sad really when you think about it."

"I know, but there are..." Spencer dropped her gaze for a moment before looking back up. "I have other things I need to fight for. I love art, I love your class, but I also like school and then I have plans."

"So my class is about pissing off your parents?"

"A little..." Spencer ducked her head guiltily. "but honestly it was more about finding my own thing, my space. Something that wasn't wrapped in Hastings pressure. You know?"

"I think I do. I'm glad you...I'm happy I got to meet you."

Spencer smiled, her eyes meeting Aria's and again she found that breathing was becoming increasingly difficult whenever the woman looked at her like that.

"You're beautiful."

xoxo

"Thank you." Aria blushed. "I meant it though, I'm happy we got the chance to meet. I think we could become great friends." Aria knew what she was doing, putting the friend card up there. She felt obliged to because she knew this coffee was more than that. She knew that from the moment she tried to suggest it earlier in class but lost her way when Spencer confronted her about Ezra.

"I'm glad we got to have this coffee at last." Spencer didn't appear perturbed.

"Me too." Aria nodded. "and about Ezra..." she stopped Spencer protesting with a stern look. "he's a friend. I'm not into him. He wants something, but I told him I can't be that. I shouldn't have gone with him last week, but he suggested something to eat and I'd had my usual forgetfulness and skipped lunch."

"It looked romantic..."

"I think, now, that it was meant to be. I can be a little blind to these things. Then I saw my reflection in the glass, I saw how we looked and knew what he must be thinking." She shook her head and found herself reaching out across the table, placing a hand on top of Spencer's almost instinctively in an attempt to stop the girl's nervous tap, but not pulling away when she realized what she'd done. "We left and I told him, he can't make me happy. Sometimes, I probably wished a little that he could, but no."

"I've never really felt like that, you know? Um with a guy. Never thought they got me." Spencer shrugged. "I just want someone that understands, makes me laugh. Someone that makes me feel warm on a cold day just with a flash of their smile." Spencer ducked her head slightly embarrassed by her confession and unable to look at the women opposite, because she knew she felt some of that for her.

"Yeah." Aria's tone was wistful and when Spencer looked up she expected to see her staring off, but she wasn't. She was looking right at her. A cup fell to the floor across the room and as if the spell had been broken Aria pulled her hand away. "I was married." She said suddenly.

"You were?"

"Swept off my feet the first week of college and that was that." Aria waved her hand as if it wasn't a thing, but Spencer knew it was.

"He was good to you?"

"For a while. Showed me things I'd never seen. I explored my passion, my art and felt so alive. It was invigorating and It was infatuation, but it seems I was the only one that couldn't see it. He ran off with my money, what little I had and I ended back in Rosewood with a Mom that isn't contrite about saying 'I told you so.'"

"Do you still love him?" Spencer asked the only question that mattered to her right now.

"No." Aria looked up determinedly. "it happened. I'd like to say I don't regret it, but I kinda do. I just wanted to break away, be my own person and for some crazy reason I thought marrying and tying myself to some guy was the answer. Crazy!" She shook her head, still unable to make sense of her past choices, but enjoying being able to share them with Spencer so candidly.

"And since him? Just Ezra?"

"I've..." Aria fidgeted with her fingers, not sure how she should answer this. "I don't trust my heart so much, so I've dated a couple of people, but nothing..."

"I was dating this guy, Toby. He was sweet. My parents weren't too keen..."

"When are they ever? Parents just don't seem to get that it only makes girls do the opposite of what they want."

"I never..." Spencer's sucked her bottom lip between her teeth and looked at the woman opposite her. "I know now that I didn't feel anything for him. That it didn't work because I'm not..." but she couldn't say it. She couldn't confess what she really felt right now because she still wasn't sure.

"And now? I mean would...is there another guy at school?" Aria tried to fill in the gaps.

"Not school, but I do like someone." Spencer nodded shyly. She wasn't sure where she was going with this and Aria seemed content to leave it there for now, her cell ringing and providing a perfect out.

"I'm going to have to go." Aria looked at her message smiled apologetically. "I'm glad we got to do this though. Much better than last week."

"Much." Spencer stood up too and they looked at each other awkwardly neither quite sure how to say goodbye.

"My Mom has this faculty dinner thing." Aria shrugged as she tried to explain. "I've skipped out the last two and really can't...I promised, but it was really fun tonight."

"Sure. I'll see you next week?"

"Yes." Aria paused for a moment. Suddenly another week really did seem too far away. "or we could get coffee Sunday?" she looked at Spencer hopefully. "My number." She quickly pulled out a pen and scrawled the digits on the back of a napkin. "text me if you can make it. Bye." Aria almost bolted it towards the door, aware that she probably shouldn't have just done that and leaving before her nerves took over and snatched the napkin back.

xoxo

"Bye." Spencer replied but her eyes were locked on the piece of paper in her hands, when she turned around the door was swinging closed and she sat back down heavily. "wow." A smile filled her face and she couldn't describe her emotions as anything but giddy right now.

She couldn't get over the fact Aria had explained everything like that. The hand touch. The number. She was flying high, a little part of her letting in the possibility that Aria might actually feel something back and it was the best feeling imaginable. Now all she needed to do was work out what to say in that text, because she definitely wanted to make that coffee on Sunday happen, she wanted it more than anything.

xoxo


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

xoxo

Spencer was up early the next morning, mostly because she'd been unable to sleep. Her thoughts kept drifting back to Aria. It wasn't coffee after class that kept her awake, but the memory of those deep brown eyes boring into her soul. The thought of meeting up with her again on Sunday, completely outside of college and class, had her needing to burn off some energy.

Resisting the urge to take a detour towards the Montgomery home, she stuck to her usual trail. She saw her as soon as she turned the corner. Her heart was working hard from the fast pace she'd set, but now it was going crazy and she was frozen to the spot.

Aria Montgomery was in her own world. An easel set in place as she painted. Clearly enjoying the quiet of the early morning, but Spencer couldn't help herself. She knew she was hot and probably a little sweaty but her feet wanted to move again and there was only one direction she was going. A smile spread across her face that would have any passing stranger asking questions, thankfully there were none. 6.30am was a little too early for the majority of this town.

"Hi." She had to resist the urge to scoop the smaller woman into her arms when Aria almost jumped out of her skin.

"Spencer. Wha...it's..." Aria scrambled to pick up the brush she'd dropped before finally looking up.

"Running. You?" Spencer grinned, finding Aria's fluster amusing.

"Couldn't sleep and it's better to come out when no one else is around." Aria grinned back as she regained her composure.

"Oh sure. You're painting, I won't stop you..." Spencer meant to go, but her feet seemed to be stuck firmly in place.

"No, wait." Aria's fingers laced around her wrist. She didn't dare move, her eyes locked on the point where their bodies connected. "Sit with me...Unless you need to run?"

"I can sit." Spencer blushed and took the space on the bench. She looked at Aria and then at her painting. It was amazing, but suddenly it was being ignored as the artist picked up her sketch pad and focussed her attention on the girl next to her. A hand reached out, brushing a loose hair off her face and Spencer's breath hitched.

"What?"

"I want to draw you."

"Now? I'm sweaty and..."

"You look pretty." Aria said as a matter of fact. "Beautiful." She whispered. Her eyes darting from Spencer's face, back to her sketch pad.

"Aria?" Spencer heard her voice crack as she said that name, unable to control the emotions that were washing over her.

"Shush." She was quickly hushed and didn't dare move or speak as the woman in front of her scribbled away frantically. It gave Spencer the perfect excuse to stare. She watched as soft hands moved swiftly across paper, it was mesmerizing. Then her attention was drawn to the way the woman chewed on her bottom lip as she concentrated. She couldn't stop looking and for once she didn't really have to. "Sorry." Aria ducked her head, the moment she was finished, completely oblivious to the way Spencer had been watching her.

"Show me." Spencer reached out for the pad. Aria tried to stop her, her hand resting on top of Spencer's. Their eyes locked for a brief moment and Aria shyly let go.

"It's rough, so don't be offended."

"Offended?" Spencer was blown away the second she saw it. "This is...wow...you're amazing."

"Thanks." Aria blushed. "you're nice to draw." She stared a moment longer then necessary and then stood abruptly. "I should go." Aria began to pack her things away.

"You want to get breakfast?" Spencer looked up hopefully, she didn't want this to be the end of their weekend, not after the great start they'd had the night before. "it's still early, but we could...um I could make something?"

"I..." Aria stopped walking but still had her back to Spencer. She took a moment more before answering. "Can you make Pancakes?" turning to face the younger girl. "I can never say no to pancakes."

"Blueberry, choc chip, plain? Whatever you desire." Spencer grinned, picking up one of Aria's bags. They walked to her house chatting freely, the way they always did and all the doubts and questions slipped away. In that moment Spencer couldn't imagine feeling more complete.

xoxo

Aria placed her dish in the sink and smiled at the girl next to her. "That was fantastic, but next time I'll make the coffee."

"What's wrong with my coffee?" looked up defensively.

"Nothing." Aria replied sheepishly.

"Fine." Spencer shook her head, but it didn't wipe the smile from her face. "you can make a pot now! I'm taking a shower." She didn't wait for a reply. She needed to clean up but she didn't want it to mean goodbye. So she raced upstairs and took the fastest shower possible. Rushing back downstairs she couldn't deny the relief she felt when she saw Aria sat at the kitchen table like she belonged there.

"Feel better?" Aria handed her a coffee and Spencer readily took a sip.

"Yes, and wow, that's a good coffee."

"I'll show you how to make it next time."

The thought of a next time made Spencer smile. She liked her own coffee, but she thought she might like Aria's a whole lot more.

"I'll hold you to that."

"Do you have plans today? Emily?"

"Emily is all studied out. I don't think I'll see her for a while. I'm a bit strict. She'd use another word, but I'll have helped her pass and then she'll be back."

"You want..." Aria sucked her lips between her teeth nervously, clearly conflicted about what she was about to ask and Spencer felt a sudden urge to reach out and hold her, but before she could Aria continued. "there's...my friends band are playing in Philly tonight. If you wanted?"

Spencer had to fight not to bite her hand off, but she nodded enthusiastically anyway. "I, yes."

"Great, so I was planning on getting some shopping in first, so maybe you'd want to join? And we could eat and yeah..." She let out a deep breath as her invitation had finally been extended and accepted.

"Give me half an hour." Spencer realized she was in no state for a trip into the city, her hair was still dripping and shorts and a vest wouldn't cut it.

"Sure. Look I've got to change, so shall we say an hour?" Aria looked at her watch, realizing just what time it was and that the Montgomery house would just be stirring, she'd have no choice but to face them all and suddenly she didn't want to leave, Spencer's home had felt so welcoming, but now they'd made plans and she needed to get herself together. Reluctantly she walked towards the door.

"Perfect." Spencer couldn't stop smiling as she watched Aria walk back to her car, leaning against the doorframe as she drank in the image of the woman she was going crazy for, before turning around and rushing upstairs to get ready. Today was going to be a good day.

xoxo

Aria let out a breath of air. The door to the Hasting's home had only just clicked shut. She'd invited Spencer out for the day and it felt great, but so scary at the same time. She shouldn't be doing this, but spending time with the girl felt so good, she wanted more of it.

The past week had been strange. She'd felt guilty after her dinner with Ezra and found herself looking out for Spencer all week. Coffee last night couldn't have been better, meeting again this morning just felt so right.

Her early morning expedition had come about because of that girl and then suddenly there she was. Aria couldn't resist the urge to draw her. The second she touched her face she felt something, but quickly dismissed it as she focussed on her drawing.

Now she'd spent the morning with her. Indulging in a breakfast she should have refused, only to find herself inviting her student to spend the day with her. She couldn't help it, whatever it was that Spencer had, she wanted. Being near her felt amazing and she was finding it hard to resist.

Her parents didn't live that far away and as she made her way through the front door she could hear the fuss coming from the kitchen. She always avoided them on Saturday's but now her schedule was upside down.

"Aria?"

"Hi Dad." She called out, a little relieved it wasn't her Mom, she just wanted to change up and go out again. Not think about what she was doing or who she was going to be spending the day with incase she talked herself out of it.

"I'm making pancakes, I didn't realize you'd gone out! Mike was just going to call for you. Practice is cancelled so we're free for the day."

"I've eaten." She poked her head around the wall and smiled at him. "Going for a shower now. I'll see you later?" she shrugged apologetically.

"You can't say no to pancakes?" he pressed her.

"I can when I just had some."

"Anything I need to know?" he looked at her, a wry smile on his face.

"Nothing!" she jokingly rolled her eyes at him.

"Probably a good thing, by the way you're Mom's invited Ezra for dinner. Says to be home for 7pm."

"I'm out and she knows it." Aria sighed. "and Ezra needs to be out himself and not hanging with my Mom."

"It's a work thing, she promises and half the faculty will be here. I told her you wouldn't be happy, but really can't you try to be there?"

"I was there last night! How many times can she have half the faculty over?" Aria looked at her father completely perplexed, but she knew he got it. "Tell her I'm seeing old friends, it's been arranged for ages and she knows that too! She needs to get over this thing with Ezra. I have and hopefully he has too. Send my apologies to the others?"

"I'll do my best," he kissed her cheek. "have fun with the mystery pancake maker!" he winked at her and she knew he knew it was something. She could feel the heat rising up her cheeks and quickly made her exit without any further questions, relieved to find the house empty when she made her way back out to her car less than an hour later.

xoxo

On her way back to Spencer's, her nerves began to kick in. She was aware that going through with this was risky, it shouldn't be anything other than two friends hanging out, but she knew it wasn't that. She was a teacher, Spencer was a student and friendship was not like this. She also knew turning around now wasn't an option. She couldn't stop now and she didn't want to.

Telling herself again that it was just a day of shopping, music and food, she climbed out of the car and made her way towards Spencer's door. She didn't get far because when she stopped looking at the floor she was met with a smiling Spencer bouncing down the path towards her car and her thoughts all dispersed, for in that second all she could do was look at the girl and try to keep her breathing steady.

"Aria Montgomery, you're really stunning." Spencer smiled at her as she stepped closer.

"Not bad yourself Ms Hastings." Aria bumped her hip into Spencer's as they walked back towards her car. "You're parents okay with you going out and..."

"They're out of town. No one really cares what I do. So long as I get A's and make the squad it's all happy. Except sometimes Melissa can be a pain, loves to stir things up."

"My Mom loved Melissa." Aria rolled her eyes at the memory, she'd spent too long listening to tales of that Hasting's girl. "I think she's everything she wanted in a daughter."

"Why not you? You're amazing." Spencer said it with so much conviction that Aria was bowled over.

"Thanks." Aria glanced sideways and saw the sincerity in Spencer's eyes and she loved the way it made her feel. "I was a difficult teenager. Followed my heart and it bothered my Mom. She had expectations and I didn't meet them."

"I know all about that!" Spencer sighed. "Melissa is too perfect at _everything_. I'm not really like her."

"Perfect people always have huge flaws, hers will show one day." Aria reassured.

"I know. It's better this way sometimes. I get to be myself when they're not looking." Spencer grinned mischievously and Aria knew exactly what she meant.

"I hope you can be yourself around me?"

"I only really feel like myself around you, you know? That this is the real Spencer Hastings." Aria chanced another look, but Spencer was staring resolutely out of the window now, mischief gone. Still a small smile played at the corner of her mouth and Aria found it made her feel warm. Her doubts about today were gone, for now.

xoxo

Note: Thanks for those reviews. Thanks for reading.


	6. Chapter 6

xoxo

The morning had slipped into afternoon. The breakfast they'd shared a distant memory, as they'd walked together talking before attacking the shops. Aria had given in and bought the boots she'd been admiring for months. Spencer had given her the final encouragement she needed, so what if it meant another month stuck at her parents. Her finances were improving, but there was no point working so much if she didn't get something in return.

Her Dad had offered her an out, she could take his money and start again and she took it. She'd pay him back slowly but back at zero meant there was a long way to go and now she was back to thinking about her foolish mistake and failed marriage. Rolling her eyes at her own thoughts she looked back towards the dressing room.

"You hungry yet?" Aria didn't mean to sound so grumpy, but they'd skipped lunch and it was getting too much. Pacing up and down in an attempt to stave off the hunger she waited for Spencer to try on the dress she was considering for prom. Aria had somehow forgotten how important Prom was and really didn't want to revisit the memories of her own. Truth is she was having so much fun that she didn't want to be reminded that the girl she was with was still at high school. All thoughts were forgotten the second Spencer swung the door open. The breath was knocked out of her. Spencer looked so stunning, so sophisticated and definitely not 17.

"You like?"

"Beautiful." Aria exclaimed, her eyes finally finishing examining Spencer's outfit and meeting her deep brown eyes, it turned out breathing was a little beyond her today.

"Then I'll get it."

"You're date will be blown away." Aria couldn't look at the taller girl a moment longer.

"My date?" Spencer turned back, but Aria was fixated with the floor. Raising her eyebrow slightly. "I've not. No. No date...I..." but Spencer didn't continue, she closed the door and Aria finally looked up. Her pulse still racing as she stared at it, wondering just what she was getting herself into.

When Spencer walked back out and made her way to the counter, Aria couldn't help but wonder who would be taking this amazing girl to that Prom and why it was bothering her so much.

xoxo

The place that Aria had chosen for lunch was an old favorite and from the look on Spencer's face it was a winner.

"I'm beginning to think you know all the best places to eat."

"I do." Aria felt a little smug as she watched Spencer devour the food on her plate.

"This is too good. Honestly why don't I know about this place?"

"Because you mostly eat at the country club?"

Spencer nodded sagely. "It's true! We always seem to do the same thing, my parents love all that, but wow it can be so draining."

"When you get away, the world changes. It did for me. Leaving Rosewood and my parents home was eye opening...it's been hard coming back, really hard somedays."

"I'm glad you did." Spencer spoke so softly that Aria could barely hear her.

"Me too." Aria's eyes sparkled as she met Spencer's gaze.

"And I'm glad we met, because it's been so great and I think we have a connection." Spencer shrugged as if what she was saying didn't carry the weight that it did.

"Yeah, we do." Aria replied wistfully. Caught in the moment she reached out a hand, it hovered just above Spencer's on the table for a brief moment but she felt like she'd been staring at it forever, wondering just how it got there. Eventually she let it rest on top of the girl opposites hand. "we should get going though, it's getting late." She squeezed lightly and then pulled back.

"I'll pay." Spencer let out a heavy breath as she reached for her purse.

"You don't...no, we can split."

"No, you drove, you got the burgers that time and you..."

"OK." Aria put up her hands up in mock resignation, she didn't want to argue with Spencer, she couldn't help but think she was adorable when she protested so vehemently though.

The check paid and coats wrapped around their bodies, they made their way through the cool night air towards the club. Aria closed her eyes briefly when Spencer linked their arms, the taller girl acting as if it was completely natural and perhaps it was. Suddenly Aria was unsure if she'd imagined Spencer's feelings towards her, perhaps it was just a crush, perhaps this was just friendship to the younger girl. Her conscience was getting the better of her. Then she felt Spencer pull her a little closer and decided to just go with it and enjoy the night ahead.

xoxo

Once indoors, Aria raced to the dance floor with Spencer hot on her heels. The music was really good and they were both high from spending the day together. Inhibitions lost. She'd missed getting out and living like this. The past few months had revolved around her return to Rosewood and picking up work. Now for the first time she felt like she was herself again and the fact that the person she was sharing it with was Spencer was no real surprise.

It was because of Spencer that she'd felt a spark return inside, something that woke her from her mundane existence. The thing that got her to ask Spencer along today and it was that thing that made her want to keep dancing.

She looked admiringly at the taller brunette and was rewarded with arms being placed loosely across her shoulders. Deep brown eyes staring down into hers and it nearly took her breath away.

"You're amazing." Spencer licked her lips and Aria was mesmerized.

"This is awesome," she took a step back, trying to get a grip on the situation. "let me get some more drinks." She began to move away but then she saw one of her friends and waved them over.

"Hey girl, been too long." Harrison kissed her cheek, before looking toward Spencer, waiting for an introduction.

"God it's good to see you, where're the others?" Aria was giddy now, it'd been too long since she'd last seen her friends and now they were giving her an escape from a situation she was getting too lost in.

"Come over, we've got a booth. Hi, I'm Harrison." He offered his hand to Spencer, not waiting on Aria anymore. Taking his time to check out the taller girl and giving her an appreciative smile that woke Aria from her daze.

"Sorry. Spencer, this is Harrison, he's my best friend from college, he's a complete rogue and player, so stay away."

"Hey." He played at being offended but the glint in his eye told a different story.

"It's true!" Aria nudged him in the ribs. "and this is Spencer, she's...um...a friend from Hollis."

"Pleased to meet you and really don't believe anything Aria tells you, I'm a great guy." Harrison still had a hold of Spencer's hand and shook it lightly.

"Nice to meet you." Spencer felt a little awkward and she got a feeling it probably showed.

They made their way towards the others and she felt Aria's hand at the small of her back, tilting her head sideways she was met with apologetic eyes.

"You're going to love them all, I promise." Aria whispered softly against Spencer's ear and Spencer could have sworn there was no one else in the room in that moment, but it was over in a second as a group stood and hugs were exchanged between old friends.

xoxo

True to Aria's promise, Spencer found that she really did love them all. Aria's friends were so much fun and a world away from high school. She didn't mind the little white lies about how she knew Aria. It made a complicated situation simple and it seemed to be what Aria needed. She noticed her teacher watching her from the bar as she collected drinks and smiled at her softly.

"Be good to her, she'll never tell you but she's a mess." Spencer turned to look at Aria's so called best friend curiously, but he didn't flinch. "You'll have to make her realize what's good for her, because she sure takes a long time to see it." Harrison continued, but before she could respond he'd grabbed one of the girls and taken her off to dance.

"What did he say?" Aria must have raced back from the bar, because now she was sat next to Spencer, looking at her intently. "I warned him not to touch you."

"You warned him?" Spencer looked at her incredulously but failed to hide her amusement.

"He's dirty."

"He's your best friend."

"I...look, don't. Not with him, yuck." Aria visibly shook at the thought.

"I'm not into him, totally not my type and besides," Spencer shrugged, "he didn't hit on me."

"Oh." Aria suddenly felt bad, but she didn't get to find out anymore.

"You want to dance again?" Spencer stood, ending the conversation and offering her hand, which Aria happily took, it had been an hour or more since they'd left the dance floor, she'd been busy talking and not realized how late it had got. Letting herself get lost in another dance was better than admitting how jealous she'd felt moments before. The lines with Spencer were definitely becoming too blurry and right now she could barely see.

The song ended and then another began, the band quickly moving through their set, but Aria didn't even know. They could have been dancing for hours. Their bodies seemed as one as they moved together. Her head was foggy and her heart beating with the music.

Instinctively, she let her hand run across Spencer's bare back and with that came the realization that this dance was becoming too intimate, too intense. Aria backed away for the second time that night. "I need another drink." She mumbled and excused herself to the bar, gripping it tightly as she tried to pull herself together. Wishing she could just take a shot, but knowing that she had to drive them both home. She was getting too lost in this whole thing and turned back to watch Spencer dancing happily, apparently blissfully unaware of the inner turmoil she was causing.

A smile filled Spencer's face when she saw Aria watching and she wanted to go back, to be on that dance floor and back to the place she was moments before but she couldn't.

Turning her back she tried to get the bar tenders attention, but really it was hitting her hard that the reason she'd had to run away just now was because she wanted nothing more than to kiss Spencer and that fact terrified her.

Aria couldn't deny what she was thinking, her motivations for today or her need to spend time with the girl that appeared in her class just a few weeks ago had become too clear and she couldn't keep lying to herself. With that realization also came the knowledge that she could never act on what she was feeling right now. Her own emotions were unreliable. She'd messed up before. She couldn't mess up Spencer, she couldn't do any of this.

xoxo

"Hey." Aria was broken from her thoughts with a shudder as the words were whispered into her ear. Turning around she hadn't expected Spencer to be so close, their bodies almost touching. She swallowed thickly and noticed the curious flicker in the other girls eyes. "you took too long." Spencer explained.

"I'm tired...we should go." She knew her tone was clipped, she couldn't help it. Right now she felt like she was treading water and so close to being sucked under, she had to get out.

"Are you sure?" Spencer frowned at the change in mood.

"It's been a long day and it's a long drive back." She attempted to soften her tone, but knew it was failing.

"Okay." Spencer tried to stay upbeat. "I'll collect our coats." She pulled out her ticket and waited for Aria to hand over hers. "You go say goodbye to your friends."

"Spencer..." Aria pleaded feebly.

"I get it. We should go."

Aria left Spencer and said her goodbyes, she ignored the way Harrison looked at her, she knew he could see through her and her lame excuses for an early exit were falling on deaf ears, but she didn't have the energy to try to pretend otherwise.

She just hugged him and felt relieved that he didn't say a word, his eyes had said enough, but she didn't have the answer to the questions he was holding back or the ones that were racing through her own head right now. The only thing she could think of was that her best friend didn't get it because he didn't know Spencer was a student. Her student.

xoxo

"I'm sorry." Aria stopped suddenly the moment they hit the fresh air outside the club. It was still cold and she quickly put her coat on.

"It's fine. Next time we'll get the train." Spencer didn't seem perturbed.

"Next time." Aria repeated, sucking her lips between her teeth. She wasn't sure there could be a next time. "Spencer?" she closed her eyes for a second, trying to find the words she needed to say, but when she opened them again all she saw was the taller girl jogging across the road. Spencer hadn't heard her or the pain in the voice and now she was beckoning her over as if everything was normal.

"Best ice cream in Philly." she said proudly a few moments later and handed her a cup of toffee.

"How?"

"I listen. You said something about toffee ice cream and some football game..."

"Thanks." Aria felt her heart well and wanted to hold onto the way Spencer could make her feel. She wasn't ready to let this go, not right now.

Spencer must have seen though because she was now looking at her strangely "what's wrong? We were having a great time. Did I do something?"

"No." Aria sighed. "It's been...I've had an amazing day." She tried to smile and found it came easy when Spencer smiled back.

"The best." Spencer agreed.

Aria pushed her conflict aside for a while and indulged in the ice cream.

They drove back towards Rosewood, singing along to the songs on the radio. Aria's heart felt light and when Spencer pulled her into a hug she wondered just what she was doing outside of the car in the first place. She could have just said goodbye and driven off, she probably should have because now she was holding Spencer and it felt too good.

Their bodies fit together like they should always be like that and arms wrapped around each other, holding tight. A hug was now more like an embrace and she couldn't let go, instead she held her closer, she needed to be closer.

When Spencer pulled back a little, Aria was reluctant to look up, her heart was racing in her chest and she wasn't sure she could meet the taller girls eye. A hand brushed along her cheek and she gasped for air, her chin was slowly being lifted and when she finally met Spencer's gaze she thought she could swim in the dark pools that were boring into her soul. She wanted to scream for help, but she also wanted to jump right in at the same time.

A door slammed and Spencer looked away. A startled look on her face that surprised Aria, she realized the other girl was looking towards the house. Aria didn't move, her feet were glued to the spot, but Spencer stepped away and with that movement the warmth was gone.

"I thought your parents were away?" Aria struggled to come back to her senses.

"It's probably Melissa."

"Melissa? She's home?" Aria wasn't sure why that scared her more than if it had been one of Spencer's parents.

"I better go in before she comes out here. Do you still want to meet tomorrow?" Spencer asked hopefully, but they were both tense now and neither could hide it.

"Yes." Aria answered in an instant and was met with one of Spencer's best smiles. Nothing more was said. Spencer made her way towards the lit up house and Aria got back in the car and headed home.

Tomorrow they'd have coffee and by tomorrow Aria knew she somehow needed to work out how to handle this whole situation. No matter how impossible it seemed right now.

xoxo

Note: Thanks for reading.


	7. Chapter 7

Xoxo

Aria heard her phone and wished she could just grab it and run away. Instead she was stuck in her Mom's kitchen and from the look she was getting leaving right now was not an option and if she even tried to check her cell, it would be flushed.

Ella pursed her lips and Aria sighed, she knew the interrogation was coming and wondered if she should get out now. "Late night?" her Mom placed a coffee on the table in front of her and she couldn't refuse it once she'd caught a whiff. It was a weakness she'd never overcome.

"Not that late." She mumbled, taking a sip. Her Mom always made the most awesome coffee and it was just what she needed this morning after a fretful nights sleep.

"I was disappointed you didn't make it to dinner. I had Noah and Sandra take a look through your portfolio."

"You did what?" she almost spat out her coffee as she looked up alarmed.

"It was in the hall, so I showed them and he was very impressed. You seem to be getting back into it."

"I am." Aria was curt, she knew what else was in the folder.

"And Spencer seems to enjoy posing for you." Her Mom added after a pause and she knew.

Finally. The bomb hit. She closed her eyes tight and tried to seek some comfort in the aroma emanating from the cup in her hands, but it didn't hold the answers. "I find her interesting."

"Angela said she saw you getting coffee with her on Friday." Ella pressed on.

"Yes and?"

"Nothing." Ella wiped the worktop for the third time. "she's a nice girl, but I'm glad you went out with some friends your own age last night. Spencer...hmm well, she's just a school girl and is easily influenced."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That she has a great future ahead of her in Law or something challenging, but sometimes she gets distracted."

"And art is a waste of her time?"

"No, you know I don't think like that, but her parents most likely do. It can't be easy for her growing up in that kind of environment. Melissa struggled, Spencer must find it hard."

"No, I don't think it is easy, it's not easy for any teenager." Aria puffed out her cheeks and let go of a deep breath, but her heart was still hammering against her chest and she wished it'd stop. Stop hammering, maybe even stop beating. Anything to stop the pounding in her head.

"So just be careful is all I'm trying to say." Her Mom's voice was soft, but she could detect the severity of the warning, she knew her well enough. "Spencer, perhaps idolizes you and that's a huge responsibility for any teacher, you have to be careful. She needs to follow her path, not yours."

"Not run off and marry young?" Aria quipped, not wanting to dwell on her Mom's words too long.

"Were you always this difficult?" The tone had definitely changed. "Spending time with a pupil outside of campus isn't wise. You've spent a lot of time together, people have seen you. Do I really need to say more?"

"I'm too old for this." Aria gave up on the coffee and got up, she stopped at the doorway and turned back to see her Mom watching her, frustration written all over her face. "she's a friend. Leave it alone."

"Keep it that way." Her Mom replied with conviction and for a second Aria felt like her Mom could read her mind, that she knew and then Ella dropped her eyes back to the clean worktop and she shuddered.

Aria escaped, the words hadn't been said, but she knew and she remembered what happened when her Mom caught her that night. It was an unspoken part of her life at home.

High School seemed an eternity ago, but she still remembered clearly the night she'd found the courage to kiss her best friend and been unlucky enough to be caught at the first attempt. The inevitable 'talk' happened and the end result was that it was just a phase, but Aria knew otherwise. She knew how much it hurt when Alison refused to acknowledge what had happened and slowly they drifted apart. Since then she'd learned to accept that she liked boys and she liked girls and she always had, but she'd never broached the subject with her parents. The fiasco with Jake had made her certain that some truths were best kept hidden.

xoxo

Finding some comfort in her room she checked her messages, nothing from Spencer. She knew it was all set, they'd meet, she'd enjoy herself. Forget all the guilt.

Then she picked up her voicemail from Harrison. He wanted to meet and she needed a friend. Someone she could be honest with because right now she was getting too good at lying to herself.

Typing out her message she read it over but deleted it. Her Mom had got to her, she always did. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she tried again.

**Can't make today. Harrison in town, insists needs me. See you at class Friday. Had fun yesterday and sad won't see you. Aria x**

She knew it was short, she also knew the implications of saying she was sad but she had to because no matter what her Mom had said she didn't want it to sound like the brush off that it was. She was chicken and she knew it, but she also knew she needed time, she couldn't just stop, she was in too deep.

When her cell beeped, her heart skipped. Spencer's message was ready to read.

_I had fun too. Also sad you can't make today, but can't wait until class. Say Hi to Harrison. He's not as bad as you made out. Spencer x_

They'd both signed with a kiss and it just made Aria think about how close she'd got last night, how much she'd wanted to kiss the girl. Whatever she thought she was feeling, she was also in a position of responsibility. Her Mom was right, she had to control herself for Spencer's sake, but then she was sending messages and keen to see her again. Nothing made sense and she felt such a mess. Sure that Harrison would make things better, she got ready to go out.

xoxo

Harrison stirred the sugar in his cup and sighed.

"So you need to call her." He gave Aria the benefit of one of his knowing looks and she almost crumbled.

"I can't and it's not that simple. We could be great friends, maybe that's all it is?" she knew it sounded more hopeful than certain.

"You don't need any more friends."

"What?"

"You heard. You've got the best friends a girl could hope for and we all love you, but Spencer is not your friend. She doesn't look at you like she wants to be your friend either."

"You worked all that out from last night." Aria rolled her eyes.

"Yes!" Harrison grabbed her hand. "Come on! It's been too long. I know Ezra was a thing, well not a thing, but he happened and you know it's been years since Jake."

"And for a good reason. I jumped in and fucked up."

"Your Mom scared you, told you to stay away and you...well, you got married." He shrugged, still unable to make sense of what Aria had done back then.

"Well, this time she's still telling me to stay away and I am not going to run off and get married. No way!"

"She knows about Spencer?"

"Not exactly."

"So this time when the girl is hot and you actually really care about her and yeah she's hot, did I mention the girl is HOT and wow that was something seeing you two on the dance floor."

"Hey."

"Well, she is soooo hot and she's into you. You didn't listen to your Mom last time, so why now?"

"Because now I'm older. I know not to jump in..." Aria put her head in her hands. She could feel tears stinging at her eyes.

"Aria." Harrison softened, his fingers stroking the top of his friends hand. "You know not to listen to your Mom, you have to listen to your heart. Get it right this time."

"She's...I...it's not and I can't."

"When did you get so old and serious? I'm going to buy you your own place if this keeps up because living with your parents is clearly bad for your health. Yes, I blame your mother for everything! And I mean everything."

"You probably should." Aria somehow managed a laugh. "I wish it was easy."

"Stop thinking. You know you hold back too much, it was so good seeing you last night. You were living! Jeez girl you've been missing for years and then I saw my best friend out there dancing and wow, I love Spencer so much for getting you back and..."

"Can we talk about something else?" Aria pleaded and was relieved that he agreed. She'd spent weeks thinking about Spencer. The rights and wrongs of what she was feeling and nothing made sense, because whatever she resolved would count for nothing the moment she saw the girl. Her heart would flutter and she was there, caught in the moment. A coffee after class had turned into a whole Saturday together and she would have gone to see her again today if Harrison hadn't shown up and now he was telling her to go for it.

Last night she'd held Spencer and she couldn't get that out of her head. It felt right. She wished she didn't have to listen to her head, she wished she could ignore her mother, but both were holding her back right now, no matter how much Harrison was pushing her, he still didn't know the whole truth.

xoxo

Spencer sighed and fell back against her pillow. Sunday was passing slowly since her message from Aria, until then she'd been living in a dream. The day before had been perfect. Aria had been having so much fun and it was heaven to watch. There had been a strange moment, she knew something was wrong the second Aria wanted to leave. It was getting hot on the dance floor, they'd been getting hot. It was everything Spencer could have dreamed of, but then Aria raced off. The ice cream was the antidote and that hug was still keeping her warm now.

Time apart had clearly brought back all Aria's doubts and Spencer wished she could just stalk her teacher a little and stop her from drifting away, but now she had to wait until Friday.

Picking up her books she threw herself back into study. It was all she could do to pass the time, but it wasn't working. She could have searched them out. Harrison would have been easier to catch sight of then Aria, but somehow she resisted and found herself instead at Hanna's house.

An afternoon of movies and popcorn was exactly what she needed and the best part was that Hanna didn't ever ask why she'd shown up. Emily was still in her own world and avoiding her since their last study date and for that she was truly thankful. She knew Emily would have known immediately that something was up, but Hanna just passed the bowl and offered her another soda with a soft smile that made Spencer want to hug her forever. Without saying a thing, she was the perfect friend.

xoxo

Somehow Spencer made it through to Wednesday, but the second she saw her best friend she knew she was in trouble.

"Hey you remember Spencer, right?" Emily sat down with a thud, Hanna just watched her curiously.

"Of course I do." The blonde frowned, her confusion palpable.

"She's trying to be funny." Spencer explained to the confused girl. "I had a whole weekend to myself and now I'm missing or something."

"Weekend? Spence, you don't call, you don't write..."

"You didn't want to talk to me after the English study date." Spencer shrugged.

"Well, I passed, so I like you again and really you need to start spending time with me again."

"I do." Spencer nodded, she needed something, she needed her friends.

"You should have joined us on Sunday. Spencer was sobbing to that movie, what was it called?" Hanna looked to Spencer, but got no response. She'd been emotional and something had set her off, she didn't even remember what they were watching. She felt her phone vibrate in her purse and was relieved for the distraction. Surprised to see it was a message from Aria she struggled to hide her smile from her friends. It was the first contact since Sunday and it had her fingers tingling.

**Coffee later? A x**

The message was so simple but it was big and Spencer knew it.

_My house? I've got a test tomorrow, so can't go out._

**Perfect. I'll be there at 4pm.**

She smiled and put her phone back in her bag, a little hope back in her heart. Looking up she realized she had two sets of eyes watching her and Hanna's pouty knowing look was all she needed right now.

"So Em was right, you got it bad?"

"I don't. What? Seriously!"

"You can tell us. Come on. Who is he?" Hanna teased.

Spencer looked at them both, she wanted to share, to tell them her secret, but it wasn't just hers and she wasn't sure if it was anything or just in her head.

"It's not. I just have other friends and like to see them sometimes too."

"Liar." Emily nudged her shoulder. "but when you want to talk, then you know where we are. Come on Han, lets get some cake, leave Spence to her other _friend_." Emily's words were soft and Spencer looked at her with a sad smile. Glad that her friend understood a little.

"Thanks." She whispered and received a kiss on her cheek from both girls.

"We love you." They chimed as they made their way out of the room.

Spencer wondered why she couldn't just get up and go with them, but she wasn't ready to spend an afternoon dodging questions or confessing truths. She had one thing on her mind now and that was seeing Aria after school.

xoxo

Aria was still shaking from the message she'd sent hours ago and now here she was on Spencer's doorstep. Her day had been impossible, her head had been a mess since Saturday night and all she wanted was the one thing that made her feel good, so selfishly she sent that message.

"Hi." Aria struggled to contain her emotions when Spencer opened the door, a soft smile greeted her and she had to fight the impulse to pull her into a hug.

"Hi." She replied, opening the door a little wider so that Aria could step inside.

"I'm sorry."

"You say that a lot."

"I do!" Aria laughed, taking a seat at the counter, her hand propping up her chin. "god, I'm just so tired. This week's been crazy. I needed to..." she stopped and Spencer watched her for a moment.

"It's okay. I make an awful pot of coffee and you're always welcome."

Aria felt so relieved to be back here. She'd felt like she was going crazy and didn't want their next encounter to be at class on Friday. Truthfully she was finding it hard to stay away, but somehow she'd told herself she was the one that had to do the right thing and being friends with Spencer was okay. She just couldn't act on the other feelings she was developing, no matter how much she wanted to. Her Mom was right. She was the responsible adult. That had all been fine until lunch today and she'd cracked and now Spencer was sitting down next to her and she was beginning to forget all the reasons she'd come up with as to why this was wrong.

"Harrison said Hi. I'm sorry I bailed but I kind of neglected him on Saturday and..."

"You don't have to explain." Spencer's hand was soft and warm and Aria sighed as it rested on top of hers on the counter. She couldn't just pull hers away. So instead she turned to look at the younger girl.

"My Mom found my sketches. We talked. I..."

"Of me?" Spencer sat up a little straighter.

"Yes." Their eyes met and the world shifted, she knew then that Spencer must have felt something back. What exactly it was she couldn't be sure, but there was definitely something.

"So what? Tell her, tell her anything. What's wrong with you drawing me anyway?" Spencer sounded almost sure of her response. Almost.

"I did, but she's watching and she's right. I'm a teacher and I have a moral responsibility."

"Yeah that sounds like your Mom. Don't listen. We're friends, we're..."

"That's what Harrison said."

"Then listen to him."

"It's not that simple, not for me." Aria cut Spencer off, she couldn't hear anymore and looked away, her pain clear.

"We're not doing anything wrong." Spencer persisted.

"Spencer, do you go out for coffee with your high school teachers? No! Exactly, because you don't do _that_."

"And you aren't my high school teacher, so whats the big deal? We like each other, we get on and besides you took the whole class out for drinks."

"True."

"So?"

"I don't know." Aria shook her head, she couldn't say why it was wrong, that would involve accepting her feelings and she wasn't ready for that. "let's just forget it, forget my Mom. I was having fun."

"I can go back to that." Spencer smiled softly and Aria felt like her heart had been lit up.

The door swung open and before either got the chance to look up the room was full of noise.

"Spencer, help me with these." Spencer's Mom hadn't even noticed they had company and suddenly Aria was concerned about how her presence could be explained.

"Mom."

"Take this." Spencer took one of the bags and with that a set of eyes rested on Aria. "Oh, hello."

"This is Aria. She's from the college." Spencer tried to explain but her nervousness only made Aria even more tense.

"Nice to meet you. Can I get you both something?" Spencer's Mom looked at the cups on the table. "Oh please don't say my daughter has forced her version of coffee on you?"

Aria couldn't help but laugh and when she saw the slight blush on Spencer's cheek she had to resist the urge to reach out and squeeze her hand.

"It's improving." Aria picked up her cup and looked at it thoughtfully.

"Well, thats something."

"Hey!" Spencer clearly didn't want this conversation to continue.

"And you take this art class too? At Hollis"

"I...um, well actually, I teach it."

"You do? Oh, is Spencer in trouble?"

"No." Aria shook her head vigorously, she didn't want to lie, but now she'd told the truth and had no idea what to say next.

"I left my sketch pad in class and Miss Montgom...Aria, she's Ella and Byron's daughter..." Spencer filled the silence.

"Of course you are. I knew you looked familiar."

"I should go." Aria stood suddenly. She needed to escape this situation, she certainly wasn't ready for it. Her own panic didn't let her miss the look on Spencer's face pleading her to stay and she really wished she could, smiling apologetically. "I'll see you in class."

"Yep." Spencer said glumly and Aria looked at her beseechingly. She didn't want to leave Spencer looking sad, she didn't want to leave when they were just beginning to talk and she didn't want to leave because she loved seeing Spencer. The last few days had seemed like forever, but she had to go. Spencer's Mom coming home just reminded her how wrong it was for her to be here in the first place.

"Bye Mrs Hastings." she half waved, a forced smile at her lips as she left. Not daring to chance another look at Spencer.

xoxo

Five minutes later and Spencer was still staring at the door. Her week had been chaotic. She wasn't sure where she was at anymore. The moment Aria arrived at her door had made it all seem so clear, the way her teacher talked. She knew there was something, she wasn't imagining it at all. Her own confusion was mirrored by Aria's turmoil and she wished she knew how to fix it. She wanted it to be simple, she wanted Aria to stop fighting against it.

"That was kind of Aria to bring your work around." Her Mom pushed a cupcake under her nose and she couldn't resist. "But it's really not like you to be forgetful. Are you sure this course isn't a bit too much?"

"Maybe it is." Spencer shrugged. She couldn't fight her Mom right now. "I love it though. It's helping me get through some stuff, you know school."

"So long as it doesn't effect your grades. I didn't realize it was Ella's daughter taking the class. Do you know she was an inspiration to Melissa? Wonderful woman."

Spencer didn't show her irritation, instead she smiled sweetly at her Mom, letting her thoughts drift back to the woman that had just left. It wasn't simple and it wouldn't be easy but she wasn't giving it up just yet.

Aria was so hot and cold it would probably drive her mad but it wasn't going to make her stop. Her Mom could think the class was too much, she had since she'd first mentioned it but she needed it more than ever now.

It was the connection to Aria that she couldn't let go and she'd fight for it if she had to but not today and thankfully her Mom wasn't too bothered either, patting her on the back and walking away. Two days until Friday. Two days.

xoxo

* * *

Note: Sorry for the delay and any mistakes. Checked it so many times I can't see anymore.


	8. Chapter 8

When Friday arrived Spencer found herself rushing to campus. She was hooked and she knew it. It wasn't just a crush. The way Aria made her feel was the most amazing thing in the world.

The conversation about moral responsibility had been going round in circles in her mind. It didn't make sense for Aria to be worried unless she felt something too.

She wanted to believe her feelings could be reciprocated. She needed to believe.

They'd spent most of last weekend together and it had been amazing. She'd felt something between them on the dance floor and knew Aria was running scared. She also got the feeling it was just because she was still at High school, but she couldn't be certain.

Harrison had made it clear that Aria didn't trust her own feelings and now Spencer was convinced that she had to find a way to show the older woman that it was ok, that she could feel like that, but she had no idea how to make that happen.

Pushing the door open, she closed her eyes for a fraction of a second. The room felt so welcoming and she knew why the second she laid eyes on Aria.

xoxo

"Hi." She made her way to Aria's desk and paused for a moment while waiting for the other woman to finish what she was doing.

"Spencer!" Aria looked up and a smile filled her face, with that Spencer lost all thought.

The two of them stuck in a moment, looking at each other and smiling for what felt like minutes but was probably mere seconds. They both blushed when a cough broke the silence. Spencer didn't look, she knew the rest of the class were slowly filing in. "I'll see you after class?" Aria stood up, welcoming the others and not really waiting for an answer from Spencer.

"Definitely." Spencer replied unnecessarily and made her way to her seat. She loved watching as Aria addressed the class. It was probably obvious to anyone that cared to notice.

Sometimes their eyes would meet and Spencer's heart would stop in those fractions of a second. Then she'd see how Aria's eyes sparkled and she wanted the room to empty. To stand up and walk across the room. To take Aria's face in her hands and to slowly kiss her lips.

The rest of the hour passed in a daydream. She didn't worry that she'd no idea what was going on. Not now, right now was all about Aria and she wasn't going to waste it worrying about the A- she got today at school.

Spencer waited for the others to leave, pretending she was still cleaning up, but really her tools couldn't be any more spotless.

"You done?" Aria walked up behind her and looked over her shoulder into the sink. Their bodies millimeters apart and Spencer could feel the warmth of Aria's breath ghosting across her skin. She didn't move, she could barely speak.

"Yep." The word left her mouth but she wasn't sure how she managed it or if it really was audible enough.

"Great." Aria must have heard and was already walking back to her desk by the time Spencer turned around.

Spencer tried not to stare but it was proving impossible, Aria was fit and so hot. She watched as the older woman toyed with something on her desk. Spencer was drawn in by the look on her face.

When she stepped closer she could see that Aria had tickets to the charity fashion show. She knew exactly what they were because her Mom had pinned them up just the day before and Spencer had, of course, been informed she'd be attending. It was a tradition she hated, but couldn't get out of.

It had seemed like the worst thing in the world but if Aria was going to be there then it'd be a whole different story. "You hungry? I don't think I can face coffee." Aria didn't mention the tickets, just stuffed them in her bag and looked up shyly.

"Always hungry." Spencer smiled, but her eyes locked on the place the tickets were now hiding, she knew there were two and she wondered why Aria was keeping them quiet. "I'll drive."

"You'll have to, my brother has my car. I'm being an awesome big sister apparently." Aria was already half way to the door and Spencer had to jog to catch up with her.

"Really? Is he going to the game?"

"Yes, and I don't need to know any more details. I still remember teenage boys."

"It's probably best you don't. Scandalous doesn't describe the pre game parties."

"Shush." Aria laughed and pretended to cover her ears. "I just hope my car gets back in one piece."

"You fancy something different? I have a craving for spicy." Spencer dug out her keys and looked up to see Aria watching her thoughtfully.

"Sounds perfect."

xoxo

Spencer grinned as Aria savored her glass of wine. "You should make me drive more often."

"I'm not allowed to be drunk in charge of a teenager."

"Why do you always do that?" Spencer frowned.

"What?"

"Nothing." Spencer shrugged it off. "Is that someone you know?" Deliberately changing the subject, she wasn't ready to confront their issues and had noticed a woman looking over and realized she wasn't about to stop.

"Shit." Aria rolled her eyes. "One of my mothers crazies. They all seem to be stalking me these days."

"Should we go?"

Aria looked at her wine thoughtfully and then at the food still left on Spencer's plate. "I was kinda hoping for some dessert. You know after spice, I like sweet." Aria winked.

"Mmm." Spencer hummed her eyes locked with Aria's. Something had just shifted and it was making her feel warm inside, but when Aria's eyes shined back at her she felt like her belly was doing somersaults and dessert wasn't really an option for her anymore.

She stuck with a coffee, whilst Aria indulged.

xoxo

They left the restaurant a little after 10pm, both had relaxed and forgotten about the pair of eyes on them. The moment they stepped outside Spencer shuddered, the night's were definitely cooling, so she quickly raced to the car, turning the heaters on as Aria climbed in.

"Thanks for tonight."

"I enjoy spending time with you." Aria was staring out of the window and Spencer indulgently watched for a moment.

"Aria?"

"It's nothing." Aria replied turning to look at the girl, her smile was soft and inviting. "You okay to go?"

"Sure." Spencer drove towards the Montgomery house, she didn't know what to say, she wasn't sure what to do. She was half tempted to lean across the console and kiss the woman next to her, but her nerves were spiked and she had too many doubts, it was a big risk no matter how perfect the moment felt right now.

She liked Aria, she liked her a lot and adored the friendship they'd developed but lately she was just so confused about whether it could be something more. She wanted to believe there could be and at times she just wanted a big neon sign flashing to tell her what to do, but it didn't exist and somehow she had to figure it out herself.

"I better go." Aria practically ripped her seatbelt off before Spencer stopped the car and it felt like another curve ball had hit her. It was going so well and now she was running away, again.

"Did I do something?" Spencer rushed out before Aria could pull the door open.

"No." Aria stopped her fingers still on the handle, her body still positioned to make a quick exit.

"It's just we seem to be having a nice time and then you bail."

"We were having a nice time, I meant it. What I said earlier." Aria shifted in her seat until she was facing Spencer. "I guess, sometimes, I wonder why you want to spend time with me? I'm old and dull and you have your friends and should be going to the parties my brother goes to and..."

"I like spending time with you more. I can miss a party or 200 to be honest. I'd normally be studying or hanging with Emily and Hanna."

"Don't they miss you?"

"They do, but I'm seeing them tomorrow for a girls night."

"Great, I worry I'm taking you away from your normal life." Aria seemed satisfied with this, but Spencer was still curious.

"I want this, you know that. Last weekend was amazing and I can't talk with them like I do with you. You get me. I think we have something, don't you?"

Aria smiled shyly. "I really should go."

"Do you want to meet up on Sunday?"

"I can't. I've...there's something I need to do. I'll call you in the week?"

"Maybe we could catch a movie?" Spencer felt like Aria was slipping away from her again. It didn't make sense, so she desperately tried to hold on.

"Maybe. I did have fun tonight, honestly." She added and Spencer looked up hopefully.

"Me too."

Her face sincere as she rested her hand on Spencer's arm. "Goodnight Spencer."

"Goodnight." Spencer looked at her for a moment before leaning forward and placing a kiss to her cheek.

Pulling away slowly, their faces hovering with just a breath between them. She saw the way Aria's fingers moved to the spot that her lips had graced just a moment before, a soft smile pulling at the corner of her mouth spoke a thousand words and then Aria shifted slightly. Leaning a little closer.

Spencer's heart was threatening to burst out of her chest as Aria closed the gap between their bodies. Then like a flash, the porch light filled the night sky and as if a firework had exploded inside her car Aria jumped back against the car door. The Montgomery porch was illuminated and so were they. Aria grimaced apologetically, but nothing could stop Spencer's heart racing, a happy feeling raged through her body as she watched Aria get out of the car and make her way indoors. Aria looked back once and Spencer knew. She knew there was definitely something there.

xoxo

It had all seemed perfect, but then Spencer sent a message and the reply was short.

**Speak Friday**

Nothing more and Spencer was so lost. She wrote back, but nothing and when Wednesday arrived she was only too aware how quiet things had got. This was becoming typical. She'd spend time with Aria and it would all feel so perfect, that something was developing between them, but then life got in the way and the moment Aria went back into that house it all changed back again. It was becoming frustrating and confusing and Spencer was left with little choice but to talk to someone, she needed her best friend.

xoxo

"And then?" Emily was leaning on the edge of her seat, she'd listened to every word and was captivated.

"She said goodnight." Spencer exhaled as she spoke, her chest hurt a little. It had been like that all week. Aria made her happy, but lately it wasn't feeling so good.

"That's it?"

"Yeah, so I don't get it." She tried to sound upbeat, but it didn't seem to work.

"And you like her? Like really like her."

"Like really like her, but she's been married and you know kinda straight."

"Marriage doesn't make you straight. Maybe she's BI? Jeez I don't know but I do think she likes you, definitely into you."

"You do?"

"Yes! The whole number thing, taking you out for the day. Dancing. Another dinner. Coming to your house. Wow, she must be so messed up." Emily puffed out her cheeks.

"So what do I do now?"

"Kiss her!" Hanna had been quiet until this point and her sudden words startled the other two. "Just do it already."

"I can't just kiss her. Can I?" Spencer had no idea. "no." she answered for herself. "she's my teacher and no."

"Why not?" Hanna shrugged. "you could leave it, get all old and forget and die of regrets. Anyway isn't it Aria that keeps going on about the teacher thing? you said it didn't matter."

"I guess so." Spencer frowned. "stop listening to what I say."

"Old and regrets!" Hanna nodded meaningfully.

"That's a bit much though, I'm not going to regret..."

"No really." Hanna cut Spencer off. "Why is a bit whatever? What is it with everyone, why not go for it? She turns you down and so what? You can get back to school and Emily can take you to some gay clubs or something. Wow, so you're both gay?" Hanna looked at them as if she'd just figured it all out. "maybe you should, you know, date each other? No wait, no. Then I'd be the third wheel. No, no dating."

"No dating!" Spencer and Emily replied in unison.

"But you're going to kiss the teacher?" Hanna nodded and Spencer copied her, but quickly stopped.

"How can I? I thought that was the moment and then the porch, but now the ignoring me again. It's like freaking torture all week."

"But it was great until that moment? Tell me again about the dancing." Emily asked.

"Yes, everything. We danced that night and...we were close and she ran her fingers along my back."

"Shit!" Emily was wide eyed. "and then?"

"I told you, she went to get a drink and when I followed she got frosty and wanted to go. I don't know it was a long day. Maybe she really did have enough. Maybe I'm imagining it all?"

"And then you went for dinner and you kissed her and she touched her face and you think you could have kissed her, like really kiss her?"

"Maybe? I don't know. When you say it like that it sounds so simple and so confusing. I don't know if she even likes me, like that I mean. It could all be in my head."

"She gave you her number, so she likes you." Emily folded her arms across her chest with finality.

"It's not that simple though."

"Text her, call her." Emily persisted and Spencer got the feeling she'd be doing what Emily wanted no matter how much she protested because she desperately wanted to do both. She wanted to call and text, but she needed a push.

"I...I can't." Spencer shook her head. "can we just get the popcorn and watch the movie now?"

"No, your life is way more exciting." Emily jumped onto the bed next to her and placed her arm around Spencer's shoulders. "Text her. It's Wednesday! You've been playing it cool. If she's cold again then we make her jealous."

Spencer shifted out of Emily's grip and lay back on the pillow. Typing a message into her cell before finally pressing send. She didn't really like the thought of Emily plotting anything, but she'd needed some encouragement to send that text. Nervously she waited for a response. Idly toying with her phone as the movie started. Five minutes in and the beep made all three girls sit up straight.

Emily stopped the movie and Spencer could feel the anticipation building as she unlocked her cell.

xoxo

"It just says Friday." Spencer groaned. "The same as before."

"What's that mean?"

"How should I know?" Spencer shifted in her seat and felt Hanna take her hand, gently squeezing it.

"Don't go!" Emily screamed as if she'd just figured it all out.

"I have to, it's a class."

"No, Spencer, you have to stay away. Make her think for once! Come on, she's got it all her way and..."

"And what?"

"Come out with us! Paige is getting us tickets to..."

"Paige?" Spencer's eyes almost burst out of their sockets.

"We're dating." Emily said a little shyly.

"After everything?" Spencer was not so impressed, she remembered Emily's history with Paige only too well. "What she did, she's a bully."

"People change okay and I like her. She's...please Spencer. I like her, she likes me. Being gay can be so confusing and it was hard for her."

"So confusing." Spencer nodded. "How did I miss this?"

"Because you've not been listening?"

"I'd have heard if you'd been talking. Did you know?" She looked at Hanna and a small nod said it all. "I'm sorry." She whispered looking back at Emily.

"I get it. I knew something was going on and tried to be there, but hey I got my own life too and Paige is... I _really_ like her."

"Then Friday I'm yours. You're right." Spencer knew she needed more friend time and yeah maybe it would make Aria think a little. Either way she had to do something, things were becoming impossible.

xoxo

Aria was on edge, she'd not got the outcome she'd hoped for. It was Friday and she been building up to this moment all week, but still nothing was certain and now she was sat in the class she taught and the girl she ached to see was five minutes late. She already knew that Spencer wasn't going to be there. She was never late.

Aria hated that she didn't know why Spencer hadn't shown and wished she hadn't been so evasive all week, but she'd wanted to get the job and to be able to surprise Spencer, but now it wasn't happening. Not this week anyway and now Spencer was nowhere to be seen.

Aria hadn't fought with her emotions so much this past week, instead she'd been desperately trying to accept them. One thing she was sure of was that being Spencer's teacher was becoming impossible. She didn't want to be a teacher at all, but needed the money. So a chance of another job and a way to get out of the hole she was digging had seemed perfect, but it seemed like it wasn't to be.

Aria lost track of what she was saying to the class and checked her cell was on again. Still no message. She'd thought they were close, friends at the least. Surely Spencer would have told her if she couldn't make it. Suddenly her mind slipped into a world of worry. What if something had happened to Spencer?

She couldn't concentrate. Somehow her other students hadn't noticed how distracted she was or if they did they weren't about to complain. Stepping outside for a moment, she scrolled to Spencer's name and hit the button. It rang and rang and her nerves were on edge until finally she heard the call connect.

"Spencer? Are you okay?" She rushed out.

"Hello?" An unfamiliar voice answered. "Spencer's in the shower, can I get her to call you back?"

"No, um sorry, I..." she was lost for words.

"Any message?" The girl asked and Aria couldn't be sure, but she thought the girl sounded amused.

"No, thanks. Bye." She ended the call and fell back against the wall. "Fuck." She sighed.

"Hey you." Ezra appeared at the end of the hall before she got a chance to dwell on the phone call.

"Hi." She looked up, but couldn't manage a smile.

"Whats up?"

"Nothing." She mumbled and he stepped closer, concern written all over his face. "Really, it's nothing. I just got confused about something. It's done now."

"OK." she knew he didn't believe her, but didn't really care.

"I should get back."

"Sure, but maybe get a drink later? A few of us are heading into town."

"Count me in." going for a few drinks and forgetting for an hour or two was just what she needed right now. She didn't want to go home. Mike had convinced her that it'd be cool if he had a party while their parents were out of town and If she went home after work she'd just be left wondering who that girl was on the other end of the line and why she'd been with Spencer when Spencer was supposed to be in class right now. Here. Now. With her.

xoxo

"Was that my phone?" Spencer walked back into the room a towel wrapped around her wet hair, but got no reply. "Hanna?"

"Sorry." The blonde looked up from her magazine. "Did you know that he's dating _her_ now?"

"What?" Spencer rolled her eyes as Hanna showed her the photo set of the new hot couple that were keeping her distracted. "My cell? Ringing?"

"Oh yeah. It was that hot teacher of yours."

"Really?" Spencer charged towards her phone but Hanna beat her to it.

"She didn't leave a message and you promised!"

"So why did she call?" Spencer wasn't asking Hanna. Hanna would have no idea. She'd wanted to send a message saying she wasn't going to class, but Emily had made her promise that she wouldn't and now Aria had called. She wished she could return it. Aria must have been concerned or something, damn she wished she'd spoken to her.

"Can we just get out already?" Hanna sighed and Spencer switched on the hair dryer to drown out her complaining.

Emily showed up a short time later and Spencer had to ignore her instinct to snatch her cell back from Hanna's bag and call Aria. She'd have no chance now the two of them were watching her.

xoxo

"You look so hot." Paige grabbed Emily's hand and earned a look from Spencer. "Hi."

"So this band is good?" Spencer tried to be friendly but it was a little hard to forget that the girl now holding her best friends hand had once tried to drown her.

"They're awesome!" Paige assured. "Right Em?"

"Yep." Emily replied and Spencer just watched as her friend turned to goo.

"She really likes her." She whispered to Hanna when Emily and Paige left them to get drinks.

"Oh, so much! It's cute, but kinda you know...not Em and then I just end up wanting what they have."

"Yeah." Spencer sighed. She wanted it. She thought she'd something, but no. She tried not to think and that was simple because soon she was drinking a beer and listening to some great music. She tried to remember what it was like to have fun and a bunch of guys on the dance floor seemed quite happy to remind her.

The music played and the beers kept flowing. She'd barely seen her friends in the last hour, but then she saw Emily charging towards her.

"We're going to go." Emily grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out of the pack.

"What? NO! I'm having fun."

"Yes, a little too much."

"You said..."

"I know what I said, but really." Emily took the beer from Spencer's hand. "You've had too many."

"And I'm having more."

"Not here, not with these guys."

"Ew, no, not into guys." Spencer giggled.

"You a fucking dyke?" one of the boys had been grinding into Spencer and couldn't miss the conversation between the two girls.

"I like girls." Spencer turned to look at him. "So yeah, that thing you keep doing...not good."

"Lesbian bitches." He shouted and suddenly a whole group were staring at them angrily.

"We're leaving." Paige took Spencer's hand before she could think of a retort and led her from the club, Emily and Hanna grabbed their coats and met them outside.

"You're crazy!" Emily laughed loudly the moment she saw Spencer still swaying to the music in the parking lot.

"I'm not ashamed, I'm in love and some college boy isn't going to scare me."

"She's in love?" Paige looked startled.

"Yeah with her hot art teacher. Arrrriiiiaaaa!" Emily sung the name, mocking her friend.

"She's hot." Spencer nodded, feeling a little inebriated now the fresh air had hit her.

"She's Ms Montgomery's daughter." Emily chuckled, nudging her drunk friend in the ribs.

"No way." Paige laughed. "so why aren't we at Mike's party tonight then?"

"Mike's having a party." Spencer stopped swaying and was completely alert.

"Yeah, it's been the talk all week. Mrs M is on that field trip and..."

"How do I not know anything that goes on?"

"Because you're focus is on a certain college lady." Emily sighed "and we're not going to Mike's party."

"Why not?"

"Because we're not. You're playing it cool and..."

"I wanna go." Spencer whined.

"Me too." Hanna added. "What? It's fun hanging with you two, but really I want to meet a guy and have some myself."

"Come on Em." Paige joined in.

"Fine." Emily huffed.

Spencer was glad that Paige had been there because she knew no way would Emily be driving them towards the Montgomery house otherwise. She'd probably drunk a little too much, but the chance that she might see Aria was keeping her alert. One block away and she could feel the nerves building in her stomach. She was only a few minutes away and she couldn't wait to seek Aria out. Her alcohol fuelled confidence was sure to get her some answers.

xoxo


	9. Chapter 9

xoxo

Chapter 9:

xoxo

The house was completely illuminated when they pulled up outside and it looked a lot different to Spencer tonight. The first thing she noticed was that Aria's car wasn't outside and with that came the realization that if Mike was having a party, Aria was probably the cool older sister that stayed away and now she was wondering where she'd be staying and realized she'd probably know if she'd gone to class. Maybe Aria wanted to stay with her? No. She knew that wasn't a real possibility.

"She here?" Emily had softened a little and Spencer appreciated it. She shook her head and her friend squeezed her arm. "We can still have fun."

Spencer stepped inside Aria's home for the first time and it felt so strange. Music filled the room and her classmates were loud and mostly drunk. A drink was thrust into her hand but her eyes were on the room, taking in the details. Childhood photos of Aria in silver frames adorned the mantel and others covered the walls. She felt like she was intruding somehow, like she shouldn't really be here now, looking at these memories. Not without Aria being here too.

Then she noticed a painting above the fireplace and knew immediately it had to be one of Aria's. She stood there unnoticed. Drinking in the painting and sipping her beer. Emily had been distracted finding her way to the beer pong game and unwinding, her duty as designated driver now forgotten as they could all walk back to Spencer's from here.

Spencer watched as Hanna chatted with one of the football team and took the opportunity to steal her cell back from Hanna's unwatched purse. Checking her messages but, after the earlier call, nothing. She tried to resist the urge to text Aria, but found herself typing out a message, after five minutes she'd got as far as 'hi' and was about to give up.

"Don't do it." Hanna appeared behind her.

"Why not?" Spencer looked at her sadly, not bothered that she'd been caught.

"I've no idea, but you're drunk and it's probably best you wait until tomorrow. There's a good reason I was guarding your cell and we both know it."

Spencer listened, not sure when Hanna became the voice of reason but drunk enough to be happy to let someone else make decisions for her. She slipped her cell back in her pocket and grabbed a discarded bottle of vodka from the table.

She moved through the house unable to hold back her curiosity and the vodka that touched her lips only made her want to see more. So maybe she couldn't call her, but she could check out where she lived.

She wasn't surprised to find herself at the top of the stairs. Opening the door, she knew immediately this was Aria's place. Her space. The scattered paints a give away, but it was something else that drew her inside. A warmth and something she craved. The faint smell of Aria's perfume lingered in the room and she found herself closing the door and climbing onto the bed with a sketch pad she'd found resting on the chair. She lost herself in the pictures, helping herself to vodka and trying to imagine how Aria had felt when she'd created these images.

It all got a little overwhelming and the room began to spin. She had a slight awareness that what she was doing was a little creepy, but the alcohol was sloshing around in her brain and she really needed to lay down. It was the floor or the bed and moving wasn't really an option anymore, the bed was too comfy.

xoxo

Aria got back to her parents a little after midnight. She knew Mike would push it, but she hadn't expected to find the place in such a mess. Quickly she got him to throw the last stragglers out with Ezra's help and began the clean up.

Taking out the trash, she heard a noise on the porch and that was when she noticed Emily. Spencer's friend didn't see her, she was lost in a heated make out session and for a moment Aria's heart landed in her throat. The bag she was holding gave out and a heap of trash landed on the lawn. The noise startled the girls and the relief she felt when she saw it wasn't Spencer must have been visible because Emily just smiled at her amusedly.

"Miss Montgomery."

"Emily, what are you doing here?"

"Just, um, talking and stuff." The girl said a little sheepishly.

"Everyones gone home." Aria began to gather the bottles she'd dropped.

"Oh. Hanna?" Emily called out.

"Here." The blonde had been falling asleep on a lounger, just out of sight.

"What on earth are you girls doing? It's freezing out here." Aria gave up and left the bag on the floor and hugged herself, rubbing her hands up and down her arms in a vain attempt to warm herself up.

"The boys just stare when we kiss, so..." Emily shrugged.

"Right." Aria felt a little awkward.

"And I was looking for Spencer, but this chair looked so good and...blankets!" Hanna displayed how wrapped up she was but it was still so cold and Aria knew they'd all been drinking and certainly wouldn't have survived a night out here and then she realized what Hanna had just said.

"Spencer's here?" Aria was hyper alert. "where?" Emily just shrugged and Hanna was stretching.

"She can't have gone. We're staying at hers."

"I kicked everyone out." Aria had, but she'd not gone upstairs. "Oh god." She ran back inside. Taking the stairs two at a time. She didn't have to look far, the moment she opened her door she saw Spencer sprawled in a heap. Closing her eyes, she caught her breath. When she opened them again she couldn't help but feel happy that Spencer was there. She was there and she was alone, a sketch pad wrapped in her arms.

Relieved that none of the crazy scenarios that had whipped through her mind in the short time it took her to climb the stairs were anything other than crazy, she grabbed the rug off her chair and placed it carefully over the sleeping girl.

The stench of neat liquor was making her feel nauseous and she knew there would be consequences later. An empty bottle of vodka caught her eye and she wondered why Spencer had been drinking alone. Brushing the hair from Spencer's face, she couldn't resist the urge to watch her sleep, it'd be easy to stay here, but she had Spencer's friends to deal with. When she turned, Emily was watching her from the open doorway.

"She okay?"

"A little bit passed drunk." Aria whispered as she stepped towards the younger girl. "are her parents away again?"

"Yeah."

"Probably a good thing. How did she get like this? Don't you guys look after each other?" Aria couldn't hide her frustration, she was mad that Spencer had got in this state and was left alone. Vulnerable.

"We do, but hey sometimes other people get in the way and mess with my friends head. I can't fix everything." Emily spat back and Aria didn't even try to hide her guilt.

"I'm...Emily..." Aria started but this was a conversation she should have with Spencer, not her best friend. "Spencer can stay here. Actually, she's going to have to. I'll keep an eye on her." Aria looked back at the intoxicated figure on her bed. She didn't trust Emily to be able to deal with what was to come. At some point Spencer was going to wake and she was going to be very sick, that much was certain.

"I'm not sure..." Emily hesitated and Aria couldn't blame her.

"You can all stay. I'll get you some blankets and then I'll know you're _all_ safe, please?" Aria smiled softly. "I think its for the best."

Emily nodded. She knew they couldn't go back to Spencer's house without her and staying here didn't seem like such a bad idea right now, she was feeling real sleepy.

"And where are you...I mean..." Emily's eyes were locked on the bed where Spencer lay.

"I'll sleep in the chair." Aria pointed to the leather armchair in the corner. One thing for sure, she wasn't going to leave Spencer's side. Emily seemed satisfied with her answer and they made their way back down the stairs, both laden with blankets and spare pillows.

Aria set the girls up in the living room and wearily crept back up to her bedroom. Spencer was still sound asleep and Aria watched her indulgently for a while before slowly drifting off.

She can't have been asleep for long when she heard Spencer stir. The unfamiliar surroundings causing her trouble as she sought out the bathroom. Aria was quick to her feet and guided Spencer into the room, she pulled her hair back gently and rubbed her back until the retching ceased. Her stomach empty and the tears wiped from her cheeks, Spencer looked up and managed a half smile. Aria passed her a toothbrush and then waited as she drank a glass of water. Not a word was spoken and a short time later she tucked her back into bed.

"I'm dying." Spencer whined as Aria stepped back.

"You're going to be fine. A sore head, but nothing more."

"You promise?"

"Of course." Aria found herself sitting back on the edge of the bed, gently stroking Spencer's forehead, watching as the younger girl slowly drifted back to sleep.

When she was happy that Spencer was settled she stood up and was about to walk back to the chair when she felt fingers wrap around her wrist. "Stay." Spencer whispered, lifting her head lightly off the pillow, but wincing at the effort.

"I..can't..."

"Please? I need you."

Aria closed her eyes, but her jaw was slack as she tried to remember how to breathe. She'd been drinking herself, but no way near as much as Spencer. Her night had been half entertaining, but she'd spent most of it pining for the girl that was now asking for her to stay, to share her bed. "Aria?"

She didn't say a word, just climbed into the bed next to Spencer and didn't pull away when she felt Spencer's hand reach for hers. When she was certain that Spencer was asleep again she let go, rolling over onto her side, still trying to decide if she should get out and walk over to the chair she was busy staring at. She didn't move though, she didn't want to wake Spencer and eventually gave into a restless sleep.

xoxo

Aria woke when the sun crept through the window, filling the room with light that stung her tired eyes. Turning to the sleeping girl next to her, she smiled sadly. She didn't know the why's of what happened but she blamed herself for Spencer getting into that state last night. She didn't know why Spencer had skipped class and was surprised that it would be to go partying. She needed to know more and an obvious source of information was sleeping on her floorboards downstairs.

xoxo

The smell in the kitchen was a little over powering, so she opened the back door and put on a pot of coffee. Aria didn't cook often, not since she'd moved home, but knew pancakes and bacon would be a sure cure for the disheveled girls that were slowly stirring in the living room. She could hear them whispering and decided it was time to step in.

"Coffee and pancakes." She announced and could see Hanna was ready to bite her hand off, but Emily was a little hesitant still. "It's okay, Spencer didn't make the coffee." She earned a snigger and three girls followed her into the kitchen. "my brother throws a good party huh?"

"Pretty awesome." Paige agreed.

"And Spencer drank a lot?"

"She had a few beers at the club..." Emily looked up from her plate. The pancakes were really good.

"And a bottle of vodka when she got here?" Aria raised an eyebrow, but Emily didn't seem perturbed.

"Oh." Hanna grimaced and drew Aria's attention. "well, maybe she had a few too many."

"And you guys were looking out for her?" Aria stood up and opened the fridge, she couldn't look at them, she felt so angry and was using it to mask her own guilt. Spencer had been in a state and her friends had no idea, she was just thankful she'd been the one to find her.

"She needed to unwind. Maybe a little more than any of us realized. So we took her out, tried to help her forget. You know she's been a little distracted lately, so maybe..." Emily's tone was clipped and Aria remembered their conversation from the night before. She wasn't going to get anywhere with her.

"Right." Aria closed the door, but didn't turn around.

"Maybe you could talk to her. She seems to think a lot of you." Emily added, her voice a little softer but Aria was in no doubt that the girl would kill her if she hurt Spencer, so she just nodded and Emily seemed happy to leave it at that.

Aria watched as the girls ate, she knew Spencer probably wasn't up for food, but put a tray together and made her way back upstairs. Gently pushing the door open she noticed immediately that the bed was empty.

A second later and Spencer walked out from the bathroom, her wet hair wrapped in a towel. Her Eyes flashed straight to Aria and the guilt on her face was painful to witness.

"Hey, feel better?" Aria tried to make it easier, but Spencer still looked like she was desperate to run away and hide.

"Yeah." Spencer hung her head a little. "I'm so sorry. I mean about last night and then taking a shower. I saw the towel's you'd left out so...and thanks for the toothbrush and I'm such a mess, so I washed and..."

"It's okay." Aria walked over to the dresser and placed the breakfast tray on it before sitting on the edge of her bed. "I got you something to eat."

"Thanks." Spencer went straight for the coffee. Her eyes peeking at Aria over the rim of the cup.

"Why did you do it?" Aria had picked up the empty vodka bottle and noticed Spencer flinch when she saw it.

"I make mistakes?" Spencer shrugged.

"You do." Aria nodded, not satisfied with Spencer's answer and making it obvious.

"I'm young? We go out, we get drunk, that's what we do and what you wanted right?"

"And not making it to class?" Aria ignored Spencer's comment about what she wanted. She may have felt bad taking Spencer from her friends but she'd never wanted her to go out and get wasted like that.

Spencer blushed but was saved by Mike walking in the room.

"Hey. So you're not going to tell Mom on me right?" He didn't even notice a blushing Spencer or the fact that she was only wearing a towel, his attention solely focussed on a frustrated Aria.

"What?" Aria rounded on him, perhaps a little harder than she'd intended because he'd just walked in and she was a little stunned. "you said it wasn't going to be big and then what do I come home to? Jeez if Ezra hadn't helped me get rid of your football heroes I'd have had to call the police."

"They're not so bad." Mike looked away, unable to take the dressing down his sister was giving him and then he saw they weren't alone. "Oh hey Spence. Didn't realize you made it. Great party huh?"

"Ezra was here." Spencer mumbled, not looking at either Montgomery in the room. "Of course." A fake smile fixed to her face as she looked up at the boy. "Hey, Mike, yeah great party. Totally awesome." She ducked her head again and the smile quickly disappeared. "I should go. My friends will be worried."

"Your friends are downstairs." Aria frowned. She'd seen the look on Spencer's face when Ezra's name had come up.

"You make me some of those?" Mike continued, oblivious to the tension in the room and gestured to the pancakes, Aria nodded. "cool." He left the room and Aria closed the door before turning to face Spencer.

"Ezra is dating someone." Aria stepped forward. "You know I'm not into him, I..., so yeah he told me all about her last night before driving me home. I'd had a few drinks and needed a ride. He helped get rid of some of the guys and...so, you know. I guess I needed to unwind too and he helped me kick out a load of drunk kids. You can't have a problem with that and I really don't have to explain myself to you." Aria hadn't meant to sound so defensive, she was so confused and so worried and knew she wasn't handling this well.

"No, you're right. I can't. I...whatever." Spencer narrowed her eyes. "I should go see my friends."

"That's it." Aria stepped in front of the door, blocking Spencer's exit. "you're in a fucking towel, you got wasted and you chucked in my bathroom while I held back your hair and thats it?" her anger suddenly taking hold.

"I can't." Spencer's voice cracked, a tear stuck in her eye and Aria broke. She stepped closer to Spencer, desperately wanting to wrap her arms around the girl and make all this confusion go away. To be honest and act on what she felt instead of playing this game of uncertainty that was scaring her.

"I was so worried." Aria struggled to swallow the lump in her throat. Her hand resting on Spencer's bare shoulder. She could feel the softness of her skin under her finger tips and slowly rubbed her thumb back and forth. "Are you ok?"

"Yes, no. I don't know." Spencer looked as confused as Aria felt. "I need to get changed and get out of here."

"You don't." Aria tried to change things back, to get Spencer to stay. She needed to explain that she wasn't mad, that she cared. She cared too much.

"I really do." Spencer insisted, finding the sweater she'd worn the night before and grimacing when she realized it was ruined.

"I've got a sweater you can borrow." Aria had been watching her the whole time and quickly pulled out something for Spencer to wear home.

"Thanks." Spencer disappeared back into the bathroom to change.

Aria sat on the edge of her bed and stared at the floor. She wanted to talk, to work out what to say, but the words couldn't be found and when Spencer reentered the room it was clear that she didn't want to stay a minute longer.

xoxo

"Hey girl." Emily couldn't hide her amusement as Spencer walked into the kitchen. "Your friend here, makes the best breakfast in Rosewood."

"She really does." Hanna nodded, looking forlornly at her now wiped clean plate.

"You all want to help me clear up?" Mike collected the plates in an attempt to tidy and placate his sister.

"I did most of it last night. Just fix upstairs before Mom gets back or we're both dead."

Aria watched as her brother reluctantly set out to clean.

"You're going to the fashion gala?" Aria looked to see Hanna examining the tickets that had fallen out of her purse. "I'd love to go, but my Mom wants me to do something with my Dad. So boring!"

"You're going though Spence?" Emily looked far too amused for Spencer's liking.

"Yeah, you know. Every year, the big mother daughter thing." Spencer half moaned but it didn't sound convincing to anyone.

"Oh." Aria shook her head and put the tickets back in her bag. She saw Spencer watching her but things were strained enough as it was without the audience and now Spencer was going and she couldn't ask her like she'd planned and to be honest after this morning she wasn't sure Spencer would even say yes.

xoxo

"We should get going." Spencer eyed her friends purposefully and was relieved that they all stood up and she didn't have to physically push them out the door. She needed to get home and process, recover and figure out what the hell she was going to do next. She'd fallen asleep in Aria's bed. She'd begged Aria to stay with her and she remembered how good it felt to wake in the night and feel Aria's arm resting across her stomach, but now she was mostly embarrassed and then Aria had got mad and her head hurt almost as much as her heart. Her life was getting too messy.

"Ready?" Emily went to start the car, but Spencer was busy searching for something.

"Shit."

"What?" Emily nudged her.

"I forgot my cell." Spencer looked back at the house, half tempted to leave it there, but she couldn't, she wouldn't be able to come back later. "You drive, I'll run back."

"Sure?"

"Yeah I'll be back before you anyway, it's quicker by foot." She wished she didn't know that, but it was. She'd ran past this house for years although she'd not taken that route since she met Aria.

"You just want more time with the hot teacher." Emily joked, but Spencer didn't even look at her. She knocked the door, but there was no answer. Figuring Aria was probably taking a shower by now and Mike was busy pretending to clean, she let herself in and hoped to retrieve her cell unnoticed.

xoxo

Of course life didn't work that way. Aria was still in the kitchen, her back to Spencer as she sat at the counter, a cup of coffee gripped tightly in her hands. Spencer was tempted to sneak back out, but then she saw Aria's shoulders shake and realized she was crying silently.

"Hey." Spencer instinctively stepped closer, she couldn't bare to see Aria like this. Her hand rubbing at the older woman's shoulders as she took the coffee from her. "I'm sorry I was off before. I was rude, you helped me and how do I repay you? I just felt so bad and embarrassed. I've never, never been drunk like that and then I was in your room and I'm so so embarrassed."

"Don't." Aria managed, wiping the tears from her face. "It's me. I shouldn't have got mad, I was just so worried, Spencer I care about you, so much and you..." Aria turned and found herself wrapped in Spencer's arms. "It's my fault and I'm sorry."

"How could it be your fault?"

"I just blame myself. I should have listened to my Mom and stayed away, let you..."

"Let me what? What is your Mom's problem with me?"

"It's not with you. It's with me, with us." Aria pulled back a little and looked up at Spencer.

"Us." Spencer repeated, nodding her head gently. It was the first spoken acknowledgement that there was something there and it was all she needed. Her eyes darted to Aria's lips, but she hesitated a moment too long.

xoxo

"Aria? Mike?" as if on cue Ella called from the front step. "why is the front door wide open?"

"Fuck." Aria jumped out of Spencer's arms. Unable to hide the fear on her face as she ushered Spencer towards the back door.

"It's...my cell?" Spencer bit her lip nervously, Aria ran back to the table and grabbed it. "I'm sorry." she grimaced, trying to make her escape before Ella entered the room.

"Spencer, you don't have to be." Aria tried to be reassuring but her focus was on the doorway, expecting her Mom to walk in at any second.

"For what it's worth you shouldn't listen to your Mom." Spencer chanced.

"What?" Aria turned and their eyes locked again.

"You should listen to your heart. Your head. Your heart." Spencer said with a conviction that Aria wanted to buy into.

"I wish it was that simple."

"It could be." And whether it was the alcohol traces that remained from the night before or the way that Aria's eyes sparkled, Spencer couldn't be sure, but she was slowly leaning forward and pressing her lips gently against Aria's. Closing her eyes and letting her mouth linger for just a second, she felt Aria's lips push gently back against hers and a small sigh escaped her mouth and with that Aria pulled away.

"I..." Aria opened her mouth but the words wouldn't come. Spencer just smiled at her and finally Aria smiled back, but this smile was new. It was nervous and exciting and everything Spencer felt fluttering in her tummy.

"Aria?" Ella's voice was closer now and Spencer saw the panic wipe away that smile.

"You should go." Aria whispered. "I'll see you tomorrow at the gala?"

Spencer nodded, she longed to kiss her again, but she heard footsteps on the kitchen floor and quickly ran.

xoxo


	10. Chapter 10

Authors Note: Sorry for the delay, I was a little unwell and it didn't lend itself to writing or much else.

* * *

xoxo Chapter 10:

Spencer got to her own back door, but she didn't want to go in. Her smile was too big and she knew it'd be obvious. She tried to shake it from her face, but Hanna caught her the moment she walked in and a detailed run down of events at the Montgomery kitchen door then followed. Emily was practically bouncing around the room when she'd finished and Spencer wasn't far off following her.

"I'm coming too." Emily stopped and grabbed Spencer's hand. "I'm not missing this."

"What? Missing, huh?..." Spencer looked at them all confusedly.

"The fashion gala thingy. You said Melissa wasn't going, so I'm having her ticket." Emily said with such conviction that Spencer was half nodding her agreement.

"And my Mom has a say in this?"

"Your Mom loves me."

"Um." Spencer bit on her bottom lip. She half wanted Emily there and half didn't. Aria was going, but there were two tickets and Aria had been coy about it and then she'd kissed her and now Spencer wasn't sure about anything.

Her friends were getting carried away and she was trying to keep herself grounded. She tried to reason that it wasn't that much of a kiss, even that she could pass it off as friendly? Except she couldn't. Aria had definitely kissed back and the things she'd said in the kitchen had been sincere. She wanted to kiss her again, she wanted it to last more than two-seconds too. Emily was either going to be a help or a hindrance and as she eyed her best friends she really couldn't decide which.

"OK then." Emily rolled her eyes at Spencer's indecision. "How about that head of yours entertaining the thought that I can keep your Mom busy...yeah? Then you can run off and make out with the hot teacher all night."

"Sorry, yes." Spencer nodded and then blushed. "No, I mean not the make out, oh god Emily?..."

"So you don't want to kiss?" Emily teased and Spencer didn't think she could possibly go a deeper shade of red.

"You can come, but you dare embarrass me."

"Would I?" Emily smirked, patting Spencer on the back and helping herself to another cup of coffee.

xoxo

Aria was still frozen on the step when her had Mom walked in. She somehow closed the door and turned around, but her heart was racing and her lips still tingled.

"Hi." Ella repeated and Aria realized she'd been in a daze and her Mom was now looking at her strangely. "Where's Mike? I see we had a party."

"Huh?" Aria was totally not with it.

"A party! Here. there was one?" Her Mom repeated slowly, waiting for Aria to catch on.

"How do you know?"

"I know. You know I always do and there's garbage on the lawn, not the best clean up. So, where is he?"

"Upstairs. Meant to be cleaning, probably sleeping." Aria shrugged, they both knew what Mike was like.

"Just tell me there were no drugs and no cops?"

"Nope, nothing. All good." Aria sat down and watched as her Mom restocked the fridge. She was a little stunned, correction, she was completely stunned and focussing on her Mom right now was all that was stopping her from floating away.

Spencer had kissed her. Just a peck, but it was so soft and it meant so much. She wasn't sure what came next. They'd need to talk. They'd needed to talk for a while now, but Aria never could work out what to say. She wasn't sure what this could become.

Her own indecision had caused enough of a mess for Spencer to get into a state last night and she didn't want that to happen again. She had to face up to things.

"I'm not cleaning your room." Mike mumbled as he entered the kitchen, not realizing his Mom was home. "Spencer can help you."

"Spencer?" Ella's eyebrows almost disappeared in her hair line.

Aria felt like she couldn't breathe. She had no idea what to say.

"Mom!" Mike dropped the bottle he was holding and as the glass hit the floor the question's on Ella's lips disappeared. She rushed to help him and became caught up in chastising him so Aria snuck out of the room and found herself curled up on her bed, glad to have escaped.

xoxo

Spencer tapped her foot restlessly. She'd got bored of waiting for her Mom an hour ago and now Emily was teasing her, again. Truth is she'd not heard from Aria since she left that house yesterday morning and she'd not tried to contact her either and now she was beginning to feel anxious about the whole thing.

When they finally arrived at the hall Spencer was desperate to rush inside, but Emily linked their arms and made sure she stayed close.

"You gotta play this a little cool Spence."

"Why?"

"Coz you run in there and grab hold of her, you're only going to freak her out and history says she doesn't need anymore freaking, you get it?"

Spencer nodded. "I'm so glad you came, really!"

"I know." Emily winked.

"Come on you two." Spencer's Mom stood in the doorway waiting for them. "we're going to be late."

Spencer tried not to roll her eyes and quickly tugged Emily along with her.

It didn't take her a second to spot Aria in the crowd. Their eyes were instantly drawn to each other. Spencer felt her tummy do a little dance as Aria's lips curled into a half smile and she shyly raised her hand and offered a subtle wave.

"Who's she with?" Emily cut the moment short. Her eyes scanning the room eagerly.

"I...well that women looks familiar, but from Hollis or something." Spencer really couldn't be sure.

"You think she's her date?"

Spencer hoped she wasn't and was relieved when the woman that had been talking to Aria appeared to say goodbye before making her way to her seat.

Aria was alone.

"I'm going to go say hi." Spencer stepped forward but Emily pulled her back. "What?"

"Wait for her to come to you."

"Emily!" Spencer whined.

"She wants to, just wait." Emily insisted and Spencer felt she had little choice but to wait it out. She felt so nervous and wasn't sure she could actually walk across the room.

It didn't take long, probably thirty-seconds at the most, before Aria made her way over, but it felt like a lifetime.

"Hey." Aria was as calm as ever. "Emily." She said in greeting, reminding Spencer they weren't alone.

"Em, can you, uh..."

"Sure." Emily laughed.

"How you feeling?" Aria asked, turning her attention towards Spencer as they stepped into a quiet corner of the room.

"Feeling?" Spencer looked at her quizzically, she couldn't possibly describe how she was feeling right now, her emotions were nothing short of chaotic. "oh, you mean after...yeah good. Lots of sleep and food. You're Mom okay?"

"She guessed there was a party and Mike's been scrubbing the floors since she got home. She's not too mad though."

"So yeah." Spencer couldn't work out why she suddenly felt so awkward. Conversation had always been easy between them and it seemed to still be that way for Aria. Maybe she really had imagined it all. "I guess I should take my seat." she mumbled.

"Spencer?" Aria looked at her confusedly. "Did I do something?"

"I didn't hear from you or..."

"I thought...I've been...I should have called." Aria knew she should have. She'd gone to make that call several times.

"Did your date not make it?" Spencer cut in and it clearly threw Aria.

"My date?"

"Two tickets. I couldn't help but notice."

"No." Aria stepped closer. "There was never a date. I mean, well I had wanted to ask someone but..."

"Oh." Spencer's eyes dropped to the floor. Her heart couldn't take this now. She'd got her hopes up and now she was on the verge of being rejected. She wished she could just run before Aria said another word.

"But she was already going to be here and I didn't want to mess with her Mom, she's like some hot shot lawyer or something." Aria reached out her hand and rested it on Spencer's arm. Like a jolt Spencer looked up and finally her brain remembered how to function properly and she realized Aria was talking about her.

"I kissed you." She blurted out and Aria's grin faded as she quickly glanced to see if anyone had overheard.

"Not here." She whispered and Spencer felt her heart go heavy again.

The lights dimmed signaling the start and she knew her Mom would be looking for her.

"I've got to go."

"Or you could sit with me?" Aria asked hopefully. "please."

"I don't think I can. My Mom..."

"Aria can have my seat." Emily appeared at Spencer's side.

"What about you?"

"Paige just texted, so I'm going to go out and meet her. You're ok right?"

Spencer mouthed a thank you to her best friend as she skipped away. She sucked in a deep breath before nervously leading Aria towards where her Mom was standing, she didn't know if this was a good idea or not, but it was definitely happening. After a few pleasantries they made their way to the front row and Spencer was relieved that her Mom became engrossed in a deep conversation about some trivial matter with Meredith Jepson the moment she sat down beside her.

"I did want to ask you, you know?" Aria leaned in to her slightly as the music began.

"You did?" Spencer turned, a grin filling her face at that revelation. "Then, I'm just happy it worked out."

"Me too." Aria turned to the catwalk but Spencer just looked at her. Their hands resting millimeters apart on their respective chairs. Aria leaned sideways and took Spencer's in hers. "I love that dress!" she whispered, but then stopped looking at the model and her eyes went to where her hand was resting, instead of pulling away she entwined their fingers and looked at Spencer for reassurance. Spencer smiled and squeezed their linked hands. The music was loud and the lights bright around them, but Spencer was lost in her own world now. She didn't see a single outfit. All she could focus on was Aria.

xoxo

"You want to get out of here?" Spencer leant in, her lips almost brushing Aria's ear as she spoke. She wanted to run. To be like this forever because right now in this moment Aria was hers and the second this show ended she was terrified it'd go back to how it was. She knew Aria would sit up straighter, scan the room, let go of her hand and the conversation would be stilted. She really didn't want to go back to that.

For a moment Aria just stared at the catwalk and Spencer wondered just what was going through her head. She imagined it was all sorts of ways to nullify the kiss or the hand holding, what she didn't expect was to be jerked up from her seat and half dragged from the room. The double doors shut behind them and Aria turned to face her, a wicked glint in her eyes and a chuckle escaping her lips and it was the sweetest sound Spencer could ever imagine. It said so much and she knew she wasn't in this alone.

Aria stepped closer, the smile was gone and her eyes had darkened. Spencer felt weak as she looked back into those eyes and saw the need that she felt inside reflected back at her.

"We should..." she whispered, but Aria stopped her, placing a finger to her lips.

"We should be ourselves." Aria's voice was thick and she rose slightly on tiptoes, her lips brushed gently against Spencer's, but suddenly they were gone and so was Aria. Spencer opened her eyes to see Aria hiding behind a pillar.

"The fu?" she exclaimed. They'd been so close and now Aria was hiding.

Aria's eyes were no longer dark, but that now familiar look of fear had returned.

"Shush. Someone's there."

Spencer rolled her eyes at the drama of it all, she'd not heard a thing but moved next to Aria and looked around the corner. A door was ajar, but no one in sight.

"They've gone."

Aria pulled her into an empty meeting room without saying a word. Closing the door and making sure they were really alone she turned back to face Spencer.

"If they saw." Aria was practically shaking.

"So what if they did?"

"You know it's not that simple for me."

"I like you." Spencer closed the gap between them. Lifting her hand, she cupped Aria's cheek and took another step so that their bodies were lightly pressed together.

"Spencer." Aria sighed, tilting her head into Spencer's hand and closing her eyes for a second.

"why is you're heart beating that way?" Spencer could feel it racing against her chest.

"I'm scared. If we got caught."

"We didn't. We're alone. Just us."

"We are."

"Are you still scared?"

"I'm petrified." Aria whispered, her eyes locked with Spencer's.

"Me too."

"What we're doing, what I'm doing is wrong. I can't."

"How? You feel it, the same as me, I know you do. At your house, here tonight! You wanted this..."

"Yes." Aria swallowed thickly, she felt it. She felt everything and she wanted her so much.

"And I want this, I want...I've never felt like this before."

Spencer was so close that Aria would only have to move an inch and their lips would touch. When the taller girl rested her forehead on hers and cupped her cheek, she shuddered. It felt so right.

"I'm your teacher." She protested feebly, but didn't edge away.

"I'll quit the class." Spencer mumbled as she connected their lips.

Aria felt like her whole world shifted the second she felt those soft lips meet hers. The kiss was firm but tender. The need they both shared somehow kept under control as pink flesh melded together. Spencer was the first to pull away and Aria instantly felt the loss.

"Spencer." She whispered the girls name. Wrapping her fingers around the back of her neck and pulling her into a second kiss. Her senses and instincts taking over. She was lost in the moment and the second Spencer's tongue ran across her lip she knew she was in deep, but right now she couldn't stop. Their tongues collided and the slow languid kiss became heated with each stroke, their bodies pushed into each other, fighting to get impossibly closer. Her hand moved across Spencer's hip, grasping at her, desperately trying to pull her closer and knowing that she could never be close enough. Her heart was pounding in her chest and her head was a daze. Nothing could really describe how amazing it felt to be kissing Spencer Hastings. She was too lost to even think about it.

xoxo

"Wow!" Spencer exhaled as Aria pulled away. "That was..." she saw something flash across Aria's face and stopped dead. "What's wrong?"

"Your Mom is going to be looking for you."

"Really? That's it. We kiss like that and all you can think of is my Mom?" Spencer joked.

"No, shit." Aria grimaced. "We should talk, I want to and I want to stay, but we can't sit here. I can't keep kissing you. I won't be able to stop."

"I don't want you to stop." Spencer pulled her into another kiss and it took all the strength she had to end it.

"You want to get coffee tomorrow?" Aria picked up her purse and waited for Spencer at the door, smiling at her warmly. She wasn't a teenager that could sit up all night talking, but she wanted to. She wished she could find a reason for them not to have to say goodbye tonight, but she also knew that if Spencer kept kissing her like that...well there wouldn't be much talking or anything else.

"I do." Spencer finally answered. Her cell rang on cue and of course it was her Mom. "so, yeah I got to go." she shrugged.

"Goodnight." Aria kissed her softly one last time, before opening the door. She watched as Spencer made her way back and smiled when the taller girl turned to wave at her shyly one last time. "No going back now." She thought, but for once it didn't fill her with worry anymore. Maybe she was lost in the passion of it all but right now she knew she wanted this and it felt good.

xoxo


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

Aria fell back against the wall and hugged herself. She couldn't believe how happy she felt and it made her wonder why she'd been resisting the attraction towards Spencer for so long. Now it was a lot more than stolen glances. She felt something and it felt like it was worth taking a risk on.

Her life wasn't just her job, she'd never planned to become a teacher and in theory she could just quit the job tomorrow, but even if it wasn't the life she'd envisioned, she liked what she did and it gave some stability and a steady income. An income she really needed as she tried to get her feet back on the ground.

It wasn't just the job that had held her back, she knew that much. Spencer was young and Aria knew that the next few years in her life would be some of the biggest. She'd be leaving Rosewood. Moving out of her family home and truly experiencing life. Aria had made some bad choices when she'd first made that leap and didn't want to get in Spencer's way. She wanted Spencer to consider her future, to have a life but Spencer was all about the here and now and it made it hard to resist her.

She wanted this to work. She wanted it to be everything she hoped it could be between them, but she wasn't stupid. She knew it wouldn't be easy. The people around them wouldn't let it be. She still lived with her parents. Her life was not where she'd imagined it to be and she had little to offer a girl that was just about to start her journey, but she wanted her and now she was in and she didn't think she could stop it. Her reasoning was fading, she was ready to try this.

It was a little after 11 when she got back to her parents home. She left the engine running for a few minutes as the song played out on the radio. Spencer lived minutes from her and she remembered a day when she would have sneaked through the back of their houses and found some reason to call on her, but that wasn't happening tonight. The light went off in the living room and she knew her Mom would wait in the kitchen for her, so she headed indoors.

"How was it?"

"Amazing." She replied dreamily. She wasn't going to act anything but as happy as she felt and she didn't care if her Mom caught on or not.

"And tomorrow we're all going for lunch, your Dad is counting on you to impress the...what?"

"I can't tomorrow. I've got...I've a date."

"You do? From tonight? So that's what that smile is about." Her Mom was a little too excited and as much as Aria wanted to spill it all out, she didn't. She just nodded and it was enough. Her Mom was talking, asking question after question and not really waiting for an answer to any of them, so Aria yawned exaggeratedly and was relieved to be excused to her room.

xoxo

Of course it wasn't the end of it. Her Mom was waiting at the breakfast table in the morning, a heap of pancakes smiling up at her as she walked in the room, but her happiness from the night before had been replaced by nerves and she didn't think she could stomach a thing. Knowing a lack of appetite would only lead to more questions, she desperately tried to enjoy the food in front of her.

"You know I'm glad you've met someone. I was getting worried about you." Ella seemed genuinely happy and Aria wondered why her Mom worried so much about her relationship status.

"Why? I've been doing ok."

"It's...the mess with Ezra and then all this, you know, with the Hastings girl."

"Spencer."

"Yes, Spencer. She was taking up your time."

"She's a friend. I like her."

"I know, but those friendships don't ever last. She'll be 18 soon and heading to college."

"So what I need is to meet a nice guy, settle and have kids?"

"Yes." Ella beamed. "and now you're making some progress it seems. At last."

"No career?" No dreams?"

"Don't be difficult, of course I won't all that for you. You've settled into teaching, you have so many prospects."

"What if I met a girl?"

"Aria." Ella rolled her eyes, but Aria just stared back resolutely. "Is it? The date?"

"Does it matter?" Aria wasn't giving it all away now. She knew her Mom was difficult. Planting some seeds now would help when she finally told her everything.

"No. I...uh." Ella was flustered, but Aria wasn't going to rescue her this time. She remembered how this had all gone down years before. She'd been a mess and her Mom just said 'it's a phase. You think you're gay, just think.' And Aria hadn't the strength to fight her then.

In her Mom's world she'd only dated about 3 people. Her high school boyfriend, Jake and Ezra. She was about to enlighten her a little when she saw her Mom turn towards the door.

"Hey you." Her Dad walked into the room and kissed her on the cheek, oblivious to the tension in the air. "I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks." He poured himself a cup of coffee. "but you're on for today right? I can't wait." He said excitedly and she felt a little guilty for letting him down.

"Actually I can't. I was just telling Mom..." but not that guilty.

"She has a thing."

"A date." Aria corrected.

"Yes."

"Not Ezra I take it." Byron picked up that there was a problem.

"He's dating someone."

"He is?" Ella couldn't hide her intrigue.

"So this date?" Byron ignored his wife. He'd had an earful of why Aria and Ezra should be together and couldn't see why for the life of him.

"She's pretty, smart. Likes me. It's early...so..." she let out a breath, not meaning to say so much, but finding it hard not to.

"She?" He quickly covered up the surprise, having checked his wife reaction he realized this wasn't something new. "and you like her?"

"I do." Aria was a little overwhelmed. Her feelings were raw and just thinking about Spencer made her heart thump in her chest. She looked at her Dad, tears of happiness and some relief stinging at the corners of her eyes.

"Then I hope it goes well today and sometime soon we'll get to meet her? We can do lunch another time." Byron placed his coffee cup on the side and gestured for Ella to follow him, but she wasn't moving. "We need to get ready and our daughter doesn't need us interfering in her life, so Ella..."

Aria watched as her Mom struggled to bite her tongue, her parents needed to talk, they needed to talk about her and she suddenly felt uncomfortable. When her cell rattled on the counter, signaling a message she quickly grabbed it. Relieved of the distraction.

xoxo

The text was from Spencer and it made her smile even though she knew there were eyes on her. She needed to get out of the house, so quickly responded and rushed out the door. She guessed her Mom was probably watching her from the window as she drove off but she would deal with that another time.

xoxo

"Want to get out of here?" she asked before Spencer opened the door to the coffee shop.

"I haven't even got in here yet?"

"No, I mean Rosewood." She felt like a hundred pairs of eyes were focussing on them both and really just wanted to be somewhere else.

"Brookhaven?"

"Sounds great."

"I'll drive." Spencer went back to her car and Aria climbed in. "So, what's got you so spooked? It's not?"

"No! I've been looking forward to this. It's just my mother." She let out a puff of air. "She found out about last night? I mean that we were together, not the..." Spencer cut the engine.

"Kiss?" Aria locked eyes with Spencer for a moment and smiled. "she doesn't know it's you, but I said I was on a date today. I said with a girl, but if she knew...that I, that we."

"Why is it such a big deal?"

"Because you're my pupil, thats what she kept reminding me. Thinks I'm going to lead you astray and into a world of art and possibilities."

"How evil of you, someone needs to protect me." Spencer laughed and Aria joined in.

"But if they knew the truth, they knew what I was thinking when I'm with you..." her voice was so low that Spencer had to tilt her head slightly to hear. "they can't find out."

"They won't, we can be careful." She started the engine and drove towards Brookhaven. Spencer pulled into a parking space and shifted in her seat until they were facing each other. She lifted her fingers to Aria's cheek. "it doesn't have to be complicated."

Aria swallowed thickly, leaning across the console and capturing Spencer's lips in a tender kiss, slowly pulling back she smiled at the girl. "but it is complicated, and being discreet is going to be hard."

"But worth it." Spencer smiled back, pecking her on the lips and getting out of the car. "it's been two hours, I need coffee." Her tone light and breezy.

Aria got out of the car slowly, wishing she shared the same optimism. It wasn't simple and she had a feeling it would all get a whole lot more complicated.

Stepping in line with Spencer, they finally got that coffee and settled into a morning talking about everything from Spencer's favorite holiday as a kid, to Aria's first encounter with her ex-husband.

"He was charming and I was easily led. Charm can be misleading."

"Do you wish you were still with him? I mean it sounded like you had an amazing time together."

"No, not still with him, but you're right it does sound like an amazing time, but it wasn't. It's my past. I don't regret it. Maybe I'd have done some things differently. Maybe I need to learn not to act on impulse so much. Clearly it's my weakness." She grinned mischievously.

"Impulse or instinct?"

"Debatable. Stop figuring me out Spence."

"It's fun." The girl grinned back at her, chancing the touch of her hand on the table top.

"For you!"

"Oh come on! Everyone deserves some fun and when you finish that we're going to go and watch the latest 3d horror film and if you're too scared I'm going to kiss you senseless on the back row."

"Really?"

"Why not?"

"Why not!" Aria couldn't bite back her smile. She was caught up in the moment and in the smile of the girl opposite her and she planned to be very scared on that back row.

"And we're going to try this?" Spencer stopped stirring her coffee and looked up. Aria knew from her face that she been waiting to ask the question.

"Yes," she answered simply. "If you want to, because I want to."

"I definitely want to."

They walked towards the movie theatre with their arm's linked and bodies pressed as closely together as possible, neither able to hide the happiness that being together made them feel.

xoxo

As the days passed, Aria found that Spencer was fully capable of sweeping her off her feet. She was living in the most blissful world and really didn't want to come down. She couldn't be more grateful that it was thanksgiving and there was no class. That decision could wait until Monday. They'd managed to spend most of the week together, but the Thursday was all about family and somehow she'd survived. Her Mom had been quiet since she got back from her date the other day. Her Dad asked a few questions and Mike was just Mike. Spencer was at home with her parents, at least that is what she thought until she heard a tap at her window. Looking out, she couldn't wipe the smile off her face when she saw Spencer grinning up at her from the lawn.

"I'm just taking a walk." She rushed out of the house, before her Mom had the ingenious idea of joining her.

"Hey beautiful." Spencer tried to hold her smile back, but failed.

"I thought today was a no way kind of day."

"I told you, I have ways. My Dad took out one of the prized bottles and since then they've all been pretending they like each other the other 364 days of the year. It's usually fun to watch, but I had a better idea."

"How did you get out?"

"Told them I had to train."

"So that explains the sweats. You look hot." Aria had a thing for Spencer in her workout gear ever since that morning they'd ran into each other.

"I do." Spencer twirled jokingly, but she must have seen the look in Aria's eyes and stopped suddenly, capturing her lips in a heated kiss, that was definitely more teeth and tongues than usual, both desperately trying to be closer to the other.

"I missed you." Aria pulled out of the kiss before she lost control, she joined their hands as they walked.

"I've got a secret." Spencer whispered, letting go of Aria's hand, she ran ahead. Aria watched as her svelte figure disappeared behind some trees and quickly picked up her pace to follow her.

Spencer was crouched over a picnic blanket when Aria turned the corner and for a moment she just watched as Spencer made sure everything was perfect.

"A picnic?" She stepped closer. "It's cold and we ate all day and..."

"It's just dessert. Some wine." Spencer looked at the bottle. "A '76. One of my Dad's favorites. Come, sit down."

"It's cold." She repeated.

"Here." Spencer stood up and wrapped a blanket around Aria's shoulders. "Better?"

"Much." She sat down and found herself chewing nervously on her bottom lip, something about Spencer had her stomach fluttering with each romantic gesture. She didn't know why she'd mentioned the cold twice, because really she felt so warm inside. Spencer made her feel so special and she couldn't imagine it was possible to feel more content as they lay on the blanket and shared the wine. The sun began to set and she wondered when Spencer would need to go, but she made no move. Just shifted closer and wrapped her arm around her shoulder, Aria leant into the warmth of her body and never wanted to let go.

"So we're...I mean...um..." Spencer had been packing away their things, but not really getting anywhere so she stopped and turned to face Aria.

"What? Come on Spence..." she ran a finger along Spencer's cheek until she reached her chin, lifting it slightly so that Spencer was looking at her properly.

"Are you? I mean are we...girlfriends?" Spencer tried.

"You want to be my girlfriend?" Aria said through a smile. She knew it was a promise of something to come and she was a little scared.

"Yes." Spencer heaved forward as she answered and they rolled back on to the blanket.

"I want to be with you Spencer. I do. It's just..." Aria stopped for a second, lifting her palm to Spencer's face. "I'm scared I'm asking too much."

"I can live with being quiet. I just need to know that this counts. That I mean something to you."

"You do." Aria grabbed Spencer's hands and looked at her pointedly. "You really do." Aria kissed her hard, she could feel the familiar warmth fill her body and her head went fuzzy. She was in so deep. She'd not expected this today at all. She didn't want anyone else. She knew the second she'd seen Spencer that there was something and now some of those questions had been answered.

On her desk at home lay a letter of resignation. She wasn't sure when or how she'd deliver it, but it was ready, she was ready to choose a life with the girl she was holding.

xoxo

On Friday she was woken by a rather too enthusiastic Harrison knocking on her bedroom door. She'd not left Spencer until the early hours, but no one in the house knew that and her best friend clearly had no idea as he threw clothes at her and eagerly told her stories about his current girlfriend.

"You have to come meet her, she's expecting us."

"Now?" She looked at him, exasperated.

"Yes. So what's with you?"

"Nothing." She fell back on her bed, trying not to let her tiredness control her. The tiredness caused by sitting up late and making out with her girlfriend. She couldn't help but smile and she knew she'd been caught.

"Oh you got some!" Harrison's eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets. "you so did!" his laugh filled the room and Aria knew she was blushing. "Man, it's been what 10 years or something?"

"Hey." She threw a pillow at his face, but it wasn't going to stop him.

"So tell me! Who is it? Not Ezra." His face said it all.

"No! No! What is it with everyone? Do you all think I should be with him?"

"God no. the boy is so dull. So tell me all about him."

"He is a she."

"Oh my god, you did it? Spencer?" he did a little twirl and went to high five her but she just stared at him, it didn't deter him though. "You banged Spencer!"

"No." She tried to hush him before the whole house heard. "We've not, I mean it's not what you think...just stop already."

"But you finally gave in? About time, that girl is crazy about you, any fool could see it." He softened his approach and she was glad.

"I'm a fool. It took me too long."

"And that smile of yours is beautiful. I'm happy for you. She's so hot and you deserve something good."

"She is hot." Aria nodded, her thoughts really weren't progressing much past the Spencer is hot stage lately.

"Girl you got it bad, but wow. I actually never thought you'd act on that and..." he paused for a second and she knew he'd seen something in her eyes. "What is it?"

"She's a student."

"Not ideal, but you're both adults and really who cares about that these days?"

"No one I suppose, except she's a student at high school. She's almost 18, but..."

"Oh fuck!"

"Yeah." Aria sighed, she wasn't in the mood for reality right now, but she needed to tell him. Hiding and keeping secrets took a toll.

"But really it's not that bad. You quit a job you never wanted and you can be together."

"I kind of like it and definitely need it."

"But she's worth more than a job right?"

"Really?" She didn't expect him to say that at all.

"What?"

"Quit my job and make a long term commitment. You're normally the first to say have fun and move on, this is big. Life changing and it's so new, but..."

"I'm in love Aria! It changes a man."

"It sure does." She looked at her friend in a whole new way and instead of thinking of her own situation she sat and listened to him tell her all about Lisa. He really was in love and it sounded perfect. As she listened she wished she could be like that. Do the things they did.

"You're happy?" he sat down next to her.

"Yes." She nodded immediately. Things were great, she couldn't hide that.

"Then that's what matters. You like each other. It's obvious you have some crazy chemistry going on. You almost melted the dance floor that night."

"And my past? All those mistakes?"

"You're not that girl anymore. You've learned. Stop being so hard on yourself."

"I'm trying. I want to live in the now, but I could do with a new job and a heap of cash to pay off my Dad and universal acceptance of the fact that I'm in love with a high school girl."

"Love?"

"What?" she looked up confusedly, unaware of the slip she'd made.

"You love her?"

"I don't know." She couldn't answer that, she couldn't answer him, but she knew it felt a lot like that.

"I think you're right to try it. I do." He looked at her assuredly. "For what it's worth I think she's amazing and good for you and that smile on your face is worth a million bucks."

"She is amazing. Sometimes I get scared that maybe my Mom's right. That she's infatuated and can't see that I'm not really so great at all. She could have anyone and I'm old and stuck living in my parents home."

"Bring her today."

"Bring her? Bring her where?"

"You've forgotten? You're coming to meet Lisa. We can make it a double date."

"I made plans with Spencer. I didn't know you were coming here today. Actually, why are you here?"

"You begged me." He looked at her confusedly, but clearly she had no recollection. "you were out drinking..." he continued..."with Ezra." Aria shook her head. "He'd been going on about his new girlfriend so you called me up and begged me to rescue you at thanksgiving. I see now that things have changed...a lot!"

"If I bring her, you'll be nice? No high school jokes."

"Aria, I'm your best friend for a reason. Besides it'll do me good. Lisa is a little uptight about me having a girl for a best friend, especially one she's never seen. Now you've got a date too, things will be so much easier. Please?" he gave her his sweetest look and she picked up her phone.

xoxo

An hour later, they were all sat in a diner on the outskirts of town. It was a place she'd visited before with Spencer and remembered the booths offered some degree of privacy in a town where everyone seemed to see everything.

Lisa was as she expected. Just like Harrison's last love of his life and the one before. Blonde, slim, pretty, but she was a little different and it was obvious why Harrison had fallen hard this time. Aria liked her instantly. Lisa was awkward at first, but once Harrison announced that Spencer was Aria's girlfriend she relaxed, Spencer grinned and Aria felt like she was doing something normal for once.

Not having to hide in front of her friend made everything so much easier and she got an inclination of how good things could be. Taking Spencer's hand in hers as they walked back to the car, she wished it could be like this all the time.

* * *

Note: Thanks for reading.


	12. Chapter 12

xoxo Chapter 12:

xoxo

Spencer closed the kitchen door and quietly made her way through the house. She could see a light on and knew her Dad was probably still working, even though he was officially on holiday. She clicked her bedroom door shut and caught her reflection in the full length mirror. Her hair was ruffled from that last kiss and the thought of it made her close her eyes. Aria was amazing and acting on their feelings was mind blowing.

She couldn't imagine her big plans for thanksgiving going any better last night and then today the time with Harrison and Lisa just made her feel like they were a real couple. It was something so simple, being together in the company of others. This was a first and she knew she wanted more of it. She didn't envisage doing something similar with Emily and Paige, not yet anyway, but one day.

Tomorrow she'd be 18. An age that she'd always thought was important, but these last few months had changed her in so many ways and now it didn't seem to matter. It wouldn't change anything or make her life better. She'd quickly muted her parents attempt to organize a party. She didn't want one. It wasn't her anyway and she didn't want to sit through a night like that where she couldn't be with Aria.

She'd not even told Aria it was her birthday. They'd always kind of avoided the age discussion because it was obvious Spencer was at high school and obvious Aria had been there, gone to college and was now a teacher. She had a feeling that her age was probably one of the things Aria would freak about and now that things were working out she didn't know how to mention it. She'd tried a couple of times, but now they day was fast approaching and she knew Aria would be pissed at her for not saying anything. She'd just have to deal with that when it happened.

Tomorrow Emily and Hanna were coming over and they would do what they always did on Spencer's birthday. Eat pizza, watch movies and remember that it was good to be a teenager, sometimes.

Aria never questioned her when she said she had plans. They'd spent most of the last few days together and it made sense to take some time away with friends, but now she was home and she really didn't want to go a whole day without seeing that smile, or kissing those lips.

She changed into her pjs and brushed her hair, staring at her reflection in the mirror and imagining how amazing her life with Aria could be if she just happened to be about four years older and not reliant on her parents.

Aria needed them to be discreet, but Spencer wanted it too. She wasn't quite ready to face up to her parents. She knew they'd be a problem and Melissa would somehow try to make things worse, she always did. The way they were right now was all she needed. Their close friends knew and they could sneak around and have fun. It made it all the more exciting. She didn't want to share that with anyone else, not yet anyway and she really couldn't say when she would. She'd learnt that sharing her happiness could lead to it ending. It seemed to be the way things worked when you were a Hastings and she'd learnt to savor her own triumphs and victories for as long as she could before her family shot her down.

She didn't want that to happen now, not with Aria. She didn't want them to try to take that from her, because she knew they'd try, they wouldn't be able to help themselves. It's how it always was, she couldn't see it changing just because she was falling in love.

xoxo

When she woke up she could smell the coffee and bacon and slid from under the covers. Her Mom always cooked her the best birthday breakfasts and she loved it.

"Morning."

"Happy Birthday." Veronica put the pan down and hugged her daughter. They weren't exactly a touchy family so the hug took her a little by surprise even though she got one every year.

"Thanks."

"Your Dad had to go into the office, but he promises to be home for tonight." Her Mom returned to the breakfast and Spencer sat down waiting patiently.

"Tonight?"

"We're going out for a meal."

"Of course." Day with the girls, evening with Mom and Dad. No Aria. She sighed inwardly, not wanting her Mom to see her sadness. It wasn't worth the questions.

"I'm afraid Melissa can't make it, she's met someone and you know how those early days are, well I guess you don't but...she's in love and he's got something planned, but sends her love."

Spencer knew how those days felt. She knew only too well and she wish she could be enjoying them the way Melissa could. Her sister wasn't her best friend and it wasn't a huge surprise that she wouldn't even make an appearance tonight. It was Spencer's day and that would be too much for her to deal with, but she didn't care. She just wanted to ditch her family and go see Aria.

"It's fine." She shrugged and then a blue box was pushed under her nose. She opened it to see a necklace. She knew it had cost a lot, but as usual it felt a little impersonal. She didn't show it, just jumped up and kissed her Mom's cheek. Making a big show of putting it on. It was enough. The coffee was poured, the pancakes eaten and finally her friends arrived and they retreated to her room.

xoxo

"What did Aria get you?" Hanna was making herself comfortable and was oblivious to the glare from Emily, but Spencer saw it.

"I didn't tell her."

"Why?" Hanna persisted. "She'd want to know. She'd want to see you and..."

"Exactly." Emily punched Hanna lightly in the arm. "So lets watch the movie."

"I don't get it." Hanna huffed.

"Come here." Spencer wrapped her arm around her friends shoulders and pulled her closer.

The movie began and they all relaxed. Emily glanced at her a few times and she hated the sympathy on her face.

Things weren't perfect, how could they be. She didn't get to see Aria everyday, or share classes with her the way Emily and Paige did, but what they had was something else and she knew Emily wouldn't get it. Spencer was happy as they were and that's all that mattered.

It was 5pm by the time her friends left. She had two hours until dinner and was tempted to take a run via the Montgomery's. She'd not heard from Aria all day and now it was beginning to sting that she didn't know it was her birthday.

She was tempted to tell her parents she needed to be with her friends, that they were all going out and she wanted to be there too, but knew it'd never happen. Instead she got changed and made her face for the obligatory dinner. Tomorrow she would find a way to casually mention to Aria that it had been her birthday and tomorrow she'd deal with the consequences of keeping it from her girlfriend.

xoxo

The meal was delicious, but she felt so empty. The conversation was always the same. They talked of her dreams, her college choices, but she knew they weren't her dreams or her choices. They were the choices her parents expected. She'd worked out a long time ago that she could live with their ideas. It wouldn't be so awful going to that college. She was lucky. She was privileged. Yet, tonight she found it hard to see, because tonight all she wanted was Aria.

Somehow she survived the questions and small talk, she checked her messages the second she got into her room. Aria had called but no voice mail. Just a text about meeting up tomorrow and it felt a little empty. She closed her eyes tight and tried not to dwell on it. It was only a minute later that her cell rang again, but when she answered, it went dead. She tried to call her back, but nothing.

It was another ten minutes before it rang again and this time she wasn't letting it go.

"Hi."

"Hi." Aria's voice sang down the line.

"I..."

"No don't say anything. I'm outside."

"You want me to sneak out?"

"Or sneak me in? I saw Hanna."

"When?"

"Tonight. I was getting some dinner with Mike and she came in with Emily and Paige. I don't think she meant to say it, in fact judging from her ramblings I think she definitely feels bad, but she told me something important."

"She did?" Spencer gasped for air, she knew what Hanna was like.

"So, can I see you?"

"One minute." Spencer pressed end on her cell and checked her reflection in the mirror. She crept downstairs, knowing her parents were already in bed, but still making sure they didn't hear. She opened the French door and Aria stepped inside. They paused for a moment, before Spencer led Aria slowly up to her room. It felt a little strange doing it like this, she'd imagined inviting Aria here, but something was different tonight.

"Happy birthday." Aria spoke softly, not sure of her surroundings as Spencer closed the door and guided her inside.

"Thanks." Spencer sucked her bottom lip between her teeth a little guiltily.

"Why didn't you say? I'd have...we could have..." Aria started, but her sentences were going nowhere, they both knew it.

"You wouldn't and we couldn't." Spencer argued.

"I'm sorry." Aria stepped closer and Spencer pulled her down so they were both sitting on the edge of her bed. "I would have tried and it could have been special. You have to believe that?"

"I do. It's just...things were going well and I didn't want to mess it up and then my Mom made plans and it's not like I could ask a date along." She felt like the words were spilling from her mouth and she had little control. Her heart was racing a little faster than usual and she knew she was worried Aria would just leave.

"Except you could have if it was a boy and he was at high school." Aria said flatly.

"Honestly?" Spencer laughed a little nervously. "probably not even then. My friends know they have me for a few hours or whatever but when my Mom takes charge we all walk the line."

"She cares about you."

"She does, but she's controlling." She took Aria's hand. "I wouldn't want to subject you to that, not yet."

"One day I hope I'm ready to face it."

"Me too." Spencer wanted to hug her, but Aria was focussed on the parcel that rested on her lap.

"I got you something." Aria sucked in a deep breath. She hadn't had much time from when she'd heard but she knew exactly what she wanted to give to Spencer, she just hoped she liked it.

"You did?" Spencer was a little surprised. There weren't many shops open this late at night.

"I hope..." she handed her the parcel.

Spencer sat on her bed and smoothed the brown paper that had been delicately wrapped around the gift. Carefully she peeled back one corner. When she saw what was underneath she almost cried. "It's..." she was completely stunned.

"The sketch I did that morning." Aria finished for her, shifting closer. "It means a lot and this..."

Spencer looked at the other painting and couldn't stop. "it's the first..." Aria paused and looked at Spencer. "I hadn't painted for years and this was the first piece, so I wanted you to have it, because it wouldn't exist if it wasn't for you."

"Really?"

"Really." Aria pulled Spencer into her arms and kissed her forehead. "I wish you'd told me, but I get it."

"Do you?"

"It's my fault."

"It's not. It's a lot of things. I missed you today. I wish I'd said something."

"Well, now I know, I'm never going to let another one slip."

Spencer didn't want to let those words warm her heart, but they did. It was an almost promise of a future that she'd never expected. Since that first kiss it had been all Aria, she couldn't think of anything else and now she was promising future birthdays. It felt amazing.

"Do you want to stay and watch a movie?"

"That'd be good." Aria climbed onto the bed next to Spencer and they curled up together. "Did you have a good day?"

"It wasn't awful. Emily and Hanna stopped by and dinner tonight was good, especially as Melissa was too busy to join us."

"Is this new?" Aria reached over and toyed with the pendant hanging around Spencer's neck.

"From my parents."

"It's beautiful." Aria's words were breathy and her eyes were no longer focussed on the necklace, now they were locked with Spencer's and Spencer felt a shiver rip down her spine.

"Aria." The name slipped from her mouth before she joined their lips. She pulled her closer and suddenly her birthday felt a whole lot more complete. Aria deepened the kiss and Spencer felt her stomach tighten when she felt a hand slip beneath her shirt, slowly moving up her ribs and cupping her bare breast. She felt a jolt as Aria's thumb rubbed across her hardened nipple and she clenched her thighs together as the blood raced to her core.

Aria's hands were warm against her skin and she ached for them to touch her all over, but as the thought entered her mind, and a grown escaped her mouth, the hand was gone and so were Aria's lips.

When her breathing returned to normal she glanced sideways and noticed Aria was now a little flush, but resolutely focussed on the TV screen and it made Spencer smile. "you don't have to stop." She whispered into Aria's ear as she shifted closer.

"I do." Aria swallowed thickly.

"Why?"

"Because I forget my head when I'm around you, when you kiss me like that and..."

"I'm really failing to see the wrong in that." Spencer said with a smile and Aria shook her head but her smile didn't shift.

"Just hold me." Aria asked as she moved into Spencer's arms, her head resting lightly on her chest. They stayed like that as the movie played out.

"Stay." Spencer insisted when Aria made an effort to leave the moment the credits rolled.

"Set an alarm? I need to be gone before..."

"I get up at 5.45am for a run. No one else is up."

Spencer changed for bed while Aria made use of the bathroom. When she returned, Spencer pulled back the covers and Aria slid in beside her.

"Happy birthday." Aria kissed her lightly on the lips.

"Good night." Spencer turned off the lamp and felt Aria's arm move across her stomach. She loved the way they fitted together and the feel of Aria next to her. It was almost the most perfect birthday, next year she hoped it'd be a lot better and she had a good feeling that it would be.

xoxo

When the alarm went off Aria sat bolt upright.

"You ok?" Spencer looked at her amusedly.

"Yeah. Wow it's morning?" she rubbed her head and attempted to smooth her hair.

"Something like that. I've got to get a run in before practice."

"You have practice today?" Aria was still a little drowsy."

"Yeah, big game next week. You should come? I mean you can watch hockey right? Maybe wear a hoodie or something. No one will know we're on or you know...the things you think." She joked.

"I'd like that."

"Really?" Spencer hadn't expected Aria to make it. The game was at school. There'd be a lot of people. "You mean it?"

"It'll be something to look forward to."

Spencer couldn't stop smiling. Aria just acted like it was no big deal and made her way into the bathroom, returning a few minutes later with her hair back in place and last nights clothes looking as if they were fresh washed.

"You always look so good." Spencer let her eyes roam across Aria's body and let them linger on her curves. When she reached Aria's eyes she saw them darken and had to steady her own breathing. She couldn't describe the way it felt when Aria looked at her like that, because she couldn't think of anything other than getting across that room and kissing her senseless.

"I hope you think that when I'm penniless." Aria looked away.

"What? Why?"

"I'm quitting my job. I can't do this. You deserve more, so it makes sense. I want to be with you the way you want."

"I like what we have." Spencer quickly corrected. "I'm not asking anything of you, I'm not."

"It's...It's not meant to be like this."

"What isn't?"

"Nothing." Aria stopped short and Spencer knew she was holding back.

"Don't." She shook her head in disbelief. "Don't do that, don't cut me out."

"I can't teach and be with you, so I choose you." Aria insisted and Spencer couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"You do?" she asked, amazed.

"I do." Aria stepped forward, nodding. "You. This. Us."

Spencer pulled her into a lingering kiss, she couldn't get enough of feeling those lips against her own, but this wasn't how this was going to happen, so she pulled back and locked eyes with Aria. "But you don't have to quit. I'll tell my parents that class is too much. They'll pull me out. Problem solved."

"And in two months I can sit at the Hastings dinner table and hold your hand?" Aria quipped.

"Two months, two years." Spencer shrugged. "it's never going to be easy and we're still new. You can't quit. Not for me. I don't want that."

"I can't keep, this is hard..." Aria dropped her head and Spencer reached out her hand, lifting her chin up, until Aria was looking at her again.

"We can work this out. I don't need the class. You _do_ need the money. All _I_ need is you."

"OK." Aria nodded lightly, a tear in her eye and Spencer quickly pulled her into a hug. "But..."

"No, don't."

"Spencer, please?" Aria tried.

"I'll quit class. You stop worrying. It's a good deal."

"It is." Aria exhaled through a smile. "I want some...I want it to be more normal between us. Yesterday was perfect. I want more of that and I don't want to miss another birthday or anything."

"It's not going to be easy."

"But you could come over to my house some time." Aria said firmly.

"And your Mom?" Spencer didn't mean to be so wide eyed, but she really couldn't see this working.

"You can be my friend. She can worry about the rest."

"I like the sound of that. You sure?"

"Yes."

"Maybe after the game?" Spencer suggested. She was tying her laces and knew they'd have to move soon before her parents stirred.

"After the game." Aria kissed her softly. "Enjoy your run."

"Or I could stay..." she closed the gap between them and quickly pulled Aria into a heated kiss. Her hands wondering freely across the brunette's curves. She cupped her ass and pulled her closer, so that their bodies were completely flush. Aria was kissing her back with equal enthusiasm and it was making her head dizzy. Somehow she guided them towards the bed and the moment the back of Aria's knees touched the mattress, they both fell back.

"Fuck!" Aria put her hands on Spencer's shoulders and lifted her slightly, so she could see her. "You are too tempting."

"Then give in." Spencer pressed her lips to Aria's neck, sucking lightly at her pulse point. She could tell Aria wanted this too, wanted her.

"Not yet." Aria bit her bottom lip and tried to stay firm.

Spencer rolled off of her and pretended to sulk a little, but she couldn't hold out. She turned onto her side and locked eyes with the woman that had her heart completely. "I'll see you later?"

"You will."

"And after Hockey on Saturday, you're mine." Spencer added as they made their way out into the garden. Aria visibly shook at her words, but didn't say a word. They both knew what Spencer was implying.

Spencer set out on her run, she needed it more than ever. The game couldn't come soon enough.

xoxo


	13. Chapter 13

xoxo Chapter 13:

Aria dragged herself through the week. Monday had her on edge, she'd planned to resign, but now that letter was tucked safely in her drawer at home. As the days slipped into nights, she was happy to let Spencer lead. It took some pressure off but she couldn't help but think she should be the one taking on the responsibility, directing the way this relationship was going.

When Friday arrived the reality that she'd lost her favorite student hit her hard. The empty seat in her class held her focus for most of that hour and she couldn't help but think Spencer was wasting her artistic talent a little. The fact that it left them free to be together definitely softened the blow and this week she'd learnt that when they were together, she could barely think at all.

Spencer was kissing her like she would die if she stopped and it was making it hard for Aria to resist her. Spencer wanted more, she'd made it very clear and Aria wasn't sure anymore when or why she'd decided they should slow it down, but she was sure it made sense at the time. Things had been complicated. They probably always would be, but now Spencer was out of her class they both felt a little freer and it showed. It definitely showed every night this week when Spencer let her hands drift lazily across almost every inch of her body. Not quite touching her in the places she longed, but close enough to ensure she would go crazy. Every time she'd buck or moan, Spencer would stop and each time she saw a wicked glint in the younger girls eye. Spencer was happy and for the first time in a long time, so was she. Spencer had something planned for this hockey match and when Aria left her on Friday night she knew she was ready too.

She slowly made her way to the hockey field. Not wanting to be too early because she knew she had to blend in somehow. There was a reasonable crowd and school support was as she remembered from her days at Rosewood. Spencer had assured her that neither of her parents would show and she was right.

The moment she saw Spencer she felt her blood pressure rise. Spencer was beautiful, Aria couldn't miss that. She'd been trying to keep her cool, but Spencer was hot and today she was just about the hottest Aria had ever seen. She could feel the heat rising to her cheeks and realized from the smirk on Spencer's face that she'd been caught staring. This had become routine this week and she felt powerless to change it right now.

Aria climbed the bleachers and wrapped in her school scarf, cheered on the team. Her claps were always louder when Spencer was involved, but after about 10 minutes she found she'd lost focus of the game and could only watch Spencer.

The game continued but her eyes were trained on her girl. She had no idea who won until a group gathered and cheered and Spencer was at the centre, smiling in her direction. The crowds cleared and she crept inside the main school building. Hiding discreetly as the teams made their exits and joined friends and family. When her cell beeped she almost jumped out of her skin.

**Come to the locker room. S x**

She didn't reply. It wasn't a request. She made her way slowly towards the double doors at the end of the corridor. Jumping back behind a wall of lockers when she heard a door close somewhere in the distance, she waited a beat, but no one appeared.

She struggled to push the heavy door open and it made that same creak it always had. Making sure it didn't bang shut, she stepped into the changing rooms. It was quiet, which seemed strange, but of course all the other girls had left and it was just Spencer. She saw her the second she turned the corner and the butterflies that had been tormenting her stomach exploded.

"You're not changed." She croaked out.

"I know you like me like this." Spencer teased.

"I do." Aria managed a reply through heavy breaths.

"I've been thinking about you. It was tough out there today. Did you enjoy the game?" Spencer was being playful.

"Yeah." Aria couldn't think straight, she was too busy letting her eyes drink in the image of Spencer as she untied her shoes and rolled down her socks.

"You had no idea what was going on right?" Spencer laughed. Field hockey wasn't for everyone and she knew it. Her laugh faded and her eyes softened as she looked up to meet Aria's gaze. "I'm glad you came out to watch though."

"Me too." Aria moved a little closer and took a seat on the bench next to Spencer. She lifted her hand and brushed a loose strand of hair behind Spencer's ear. "You're beautiful."

"I'm sweaty."

"You are." Aria dropped her hand. "I can wait outside..."

"Or you could join me..." Spencer looked at her suggestively. She wasn't about to let Aria think of a reason to resist. She'd got the key to lock up and knew they'd not be disturbed. Standing she pulled Aria into her arms, kissing her tenderly on the lips.

"Is this what you want?" Aria asked tentatively and Spencer stopped for a moment, looking her directly in the eyes.

"Yes." She said assuredly, she could see the longing in Aria's eyes and let her hand slip beneath her waistband. "I want this. I want you."

"We should...Some one could walk in." Aria half protested, but she didn't want this to stop now.

"You should stop thinking and I've got the key." Spencer hummed, she didn't halt her assault on Aria's body. Her lips were moving slowly across her neck, nipping at the tender flesh and then soothing it with her tongue. Her free hand cupped Aria's breast over her shirt, but it wasn't enough. She tugged at the shirt, removing it swiftly and wrapping her lips around a hardened nipple. Aria groaned and Spencer's hips jutted into her instinctively, pushing her back against the wall of lockers with a thud.

"Fuck!" Aria winced, but before Spencer could check she was ok, she'd reconnected their lips and their tongues were moving in a slow languid dance.

This might not been quite what she'd imagined, but it was exactly what she needed. She needed Aria. She danced her fingers across Aria's panties and instantly knew just how much Aria wanted her too. She closed her eyes at the sensation of finally getting to touch Aria there and swiftly pushed the flimsy material to one side. Her long fingers running through Aria's slick folds, her thumb lightly teasing her clit.

Aria's hips jutted into her and her teeth mashed down on Spencer's lip. She couldn't stop now, she didn't want to. Slowly she slipped her middle finger deep into Aria and she groaned at the sensation, pressing her body harder into Aria's.

Aria's hands were all over her. Frantically tugging at her hair, then palming her breasts. She struggled to maintain a rhythm as the shorter woman rocked hard against her hand. She knew she was getting it right from the sounds she was hearing, Aria was so fucking sexy, she thought she'd come just listening to her. She added a second finger and almost instantly felt Aria's inner walls begin to clamp around her.

Panting hard into her neck, she struggled to hold them both up as Aria's orgasm ripped through her small body. Spencer heard her name escape the other woman's lips and she couldn't imagine a sweeter sound. She wanted to hear it again. She wanted to know how it felt forever.

"Hey." Spencer puffed out a breath of air a few moments later and placed a soft kiss to Aria's damp forehead. "that was hot!"

"So fucking hot!" Aria breathed, pulling Spencer into a sloppy kiss. She began fumbling at Spencer's clothes but Spencer took her hand and stopped her.

"Shower!" She insisted with a grin.

"Help!" Aria whimpered, but was the first to strip and run under the hot jets of water. Spencer wanted to laugh, but she didn't have anything but desire left inside her. She ran in behind her girlfriend and pinned her against the wall, but her dominance didn't last. Aria clearly had other ideas and as she was turned around she completely submitted. Aria's lips were wrapped around her clit and her hands were caressing her thighs. She tilted her head back and gave in completely.

xoxo

It was a little strange sitting at the Montgomery's Kitchen table an hour after they'd just done all the things that Spencer had ever wanted to do. Now she had an idea of how amazing sex could be and she was desperate to keep trying new things, but instead she was drinking coffee with Aria and Mike. It definitely felt peculiar, but Aria had wanted normal and apparently this was what she'd meant.

She had one eye on Aria and another on the doorway, thinking about how close that stairway was and how soon they could be in Aria's bed. She didn't care about being caught. Nothing else mattered right now, but then there was Mike. She glanced at him and wished he'd go and do something else, but he was telling Aria something that really seemed to matter to him and Aria was doing a good job of feigning interest.

The front door closed and Aria's eyes darted towards her, she felt her heart race from nerves. They both knew who it was before she walked in.

"Hey you two. Spencer..." Ella paused clearly a little surprised to find Spencer at her kitchen table. "lovely to see you." Spencer looked up and tried to smile, but figured it wasn't quite working as everyone was looking at her strangely.

"Hi Mom." Aria shot Spencer a look that was probably meant to be reassuring but really only reminded Spencer how much she felt for the woman, how much she wanted to get out of this room and how much she wanted to kiss those lips.

"I...are you and Spencer working on an assignment?" She turned to Mike, but he just looked at her confusedly.

"Spencer's having coffee with me." Aria explained. "She can't take my class anymore, but we're friends and..."

Ella seemed completely at a loss. "Aria you're hair is wet." She tutted, dismissing what her daughter had just said.

Spencer desperately tried not to giggle and when that emotion dissipated she was back to thinking just why Aria's hair was still wet and she looked up to see Aria watching her longingly and she knew. They had to get out of there fast. Being normal was great. It was what Aria had asked for, but really it could wait. Now she just had to think of a way they could both be naked in the same room together soon. Or anywhere, a room wasn't essential.

"We're just leaving." Aria stood up as if she could read Spencer's mind, but of course it couldn't be that simple.

"We can talk later." Ella made sure she had the last word, but the second they broke from the room Aria linked their hands.

xoxo

"I'll talk to her. I don't know what I'm going to say but I'll..." Aria had avoided the subject as they drove off, but now it was getting late and Spencer had just driven her home. They were parked outside the Montgomery house and all her worries seemed to slip back into her mind instantly.

"She's going to go crazy." Spencer looked up at the house.

"She already is!" Aria joked, but Spencer could see the worry in her eyes.

"Your Mom is going to be okay, she adores you and she will get used to us." She tried. "I promise."

"I know." Aria rested her head against Spencer's shoulder and left it there for a moment. Spencer slipped a hand around her waist and held her. She knew it'd be okay one day, it had to be. That day just wasn't today.

"I should go, but I want to see you again...like really soon." Spencer was practically bouncing at the thought of it.

"I'll call you later. Maybe we could get lunch tomorrow?"

"Can you get away for the whole day?" Spencer asked hopefully.

"Yeah, I guess. Where?"

"It's a surprise." Spencer tried to stifle her smile. Leaning in for a kiss without thinking that anyone, mainly Ella, could see. Aria didn't stop her. She kissed her back, wrapping her fingers in her hair and losing herself in the moment.

"I can't wait." Aria replied, finally breaking the kiss and reluctantly saying goodbye. She climbed out of Spencer's car and watched from the front step as the tail lights disappeared into the night.

xoxo

Whatever Spencer had planned was sure to be perfect, she'd not got it wrong once. Now she just had to find the strength to walk back inside and the warmth she felt in her heart right now made it seem a little easier. Today she had courage. Today she could handle her Mom. She had Spencer and it was definitely worth it.

"So?" Ella was sat up waiting for her, just as she'd expected. Mike and her Dad were nowhere to be seen which didn't surprise her at all.

"You have a good day?" she asked nonchalantly, pouring herself a juice before staring back at her Mom.

"I hope you know what you're doing." Ella stared back meaningfully.

"What if I'm happy Mom? Like really happy and it's all amazing and more than I'd ever imagine my life could be. What then?"

Ella pursed her lips and dropped her eyes. "Just be sure." She whispered and then looked up, not an ounce of anger in her eyes. "Be really sure, because what you're doing...what you're risking...for both of you. So think of her too." She spoke softly and it pulled at Aria.

"I do." Aria nodded. "I'm always thinking of her and what's right and...I love her."

"Does she love you?"

"I think so, I don't know. Yes. Maybe." Aria stuttered.

Ella stood up and made her way from the room and Aria wished for a moment that she could beg her to stay, but the words didn't come.

Ella stopped in the doorway, but didn't look back. "Just be careful." And then she was gone.

Aria found herself staring at that empty doorway for the next 30 minutes. Her Dad walked in a little later and she held something of a conversation with him. She still didn't move. Dinner was cooked around her and her Mom was acting as if nothing had happened. When she finally found her legs she made her way into the yard and stared up at the stars. She didn't know how it had all got to this point.

The last few months were a blur. She loved Spencer. Today she had told her Mom and she knew in that moment that she really did. Attraction and lust and feelings had been all consuming, but today when she finally had to face up to herself, stand up to her Mom, today she knew for sure. She'd not felt anything like this before. She wanted to shout it out, but could settle for finding the right time to tell Spencer.


	14. Chapter 14

Note: Apologies for the wait. I took a break over Christmas and then January came and life got hectic, I'd like to say it's settled down now, but I've no idea. Anyway, I've missed working on this and am glad to be back despite usual nerves of posting and all that stuff. Sorry for any mistakes.

* * *

Chapter 14:

xoxo

The next morning she sat on the front step waiting for Spencer to arrive. She'd caught her Mom watching her over breakfast, but nothing more was said. In fact, just before she left, Ella had taken her plate and lightly squeezed her hand.

Maybe she wasn't going to have to wait another thirty years for her Mom to come around as she'd feared. Perhaps seeing how much she cared for Spencer was making acceptance easier for Ella? She couldn't be sure and vowed to talk to her mom again, but for now she was itching to see the girl that was driving a little too fast up her driveway. She wanted to live. To feel everything and Spencer gave her that.

Her Mom reminded her of how life could stagnate and everything she'd tried not to be. Of all the reasons she'd left and all the questions as to why she'd found herself back here again. She'd failed. Her marriage was a mistake, her choices flawed and she'd landed back in Rosewood. It was the simple choice. The easy out and a chance to try to rebuild her life. She'd no idea where it'd go. Her inspiration had gone, her passions forgotten. Then she looked up that first day of class and there was Spencer and it seemed that nothing had been a mistake at all.

Her thoughts were broken as the car came to a stop in front of her. She looked up and her heart filled with a now familiar warmth.

"You all set?" Spencer jumped out of her car grinning from ear to ear, quickly running to the passenger side. Opening the door for Aria to get in.

"Where are we going?" Aria giggled, Spencer's smile was infectious.

"It's a surprise." Spencer backed out of the drive and set off on the short journey. Pulling up outside the lake house a little while later.

"I've been here before?" Aria scrunched up her forehead, she couldn't quite remember, but the aging house was locked in her memory somewhere. The steps to the porch and the path down to the lake all seemed familiar.

"It's my families. Melissa used it to party sometimes..."

"Ah, yeah there was this one party." Her eyes flitted closed as she tried to remember that night. "It was wild. Probably the only time I ever really hung out with your sister. She was okay then, we're were all friends I suppose, but then...she got with Garrett Reynolds and...changed."

"I remember. I was here. Halloween?"

"you were?" Aria didn't mean to gasp as she turned to face Spencer. A little bit of her wished they'd met then, that it was the way this story played out, but maybe it wouldn't have worked. Spencer would have been a kid and Aria could remember that she wasn't the nicest of girls back then. Spencer probably wouldn't have given her a second look.

"I was a little dorky." Spencer kicked at the dirt around her feet, a light blush forming at her cheeks that Aria wanted to wipe away with her thumb and then she remembered.

"Oh, I think I remember you, oh god." Aria grimaced. "...Ali was really rude to you?"

"She was a bitch!" Spencer recalled that night vividly. "That was you? The one with her?"

"Yeah." Aria chewed her bottom lip and looked at Spencer adoringly. "I'm sorry. I used to hang on her every word. Never had a thought of my own."

"It's a time long gone." Spencer dismissed it all with a wave of her hand. What could have been the first time they met and all that could have been. Aria was slow to realize that it didn't matter, because they were here now and they were together. "So, you want to come inside? It's not so scary in there now. My parents cleaned it out after and were going to sell it, but then something changed. I never asked." She shrugged, nervously waiting for Aria to decide.

They walked up to the front step and Spencer rooted out the key. The door creaked a little, but inside was beautiful and Aria took a moment to take in her surroundings. The paint was peeling on some of the walls and old furniture scattered the rooms. It was practically empty except the front room where Spencer was already getting a fire started. Candles were scattered around and Aria grabbed some matches and began lighting them. When she was done Spencer returned with a basket of food and a collection of blankets.

"It's beautiful." Aria beamed as if the room had a new lease of life. They set up a spot on the floor and delved into the food, but it wasn't long before it had been pushed to one side and they were tangled together. Aria was so lost in the girl in her arms, she couldn't be sure where she finished and Spencer began. Both hungrily kissing and pulling at each others clothes. Naked limbs melded into one as they no longer fought the attraction, now they just fought to be closer.

xoxo

They spent the next few hours like that before Aria reluctantly began clearing up. It had been a complete dream, free from the outside world and Aria couldn't imagine anything more blissful. The next week followed a similar pattern to the one before, except now Spencer's hands were touching her in the place she wanted and it felt impossibly perfect.

Her heart raced from the moment the younger girl would walk in the room, the second their eyes met she'd forget how to speak. She realized it was a good job that Spencer didn't seem phased by her sudden loss of words. She was content kissing her slowly until she couldn't breathe and was forced to separate for air.

Her class on Friday was still missing her favorite pupil, but tonight she knew she had a date with her and it made it seem so much easier. They didn't need fancy restaurants, they needed each other and Spencer showed her exactly what she wanted by driving her back to the drive thru and ordering two of Aria's favorite burgers. She sat happily in the car and was a little confused when Spencer stopped at her house.

"You forget something?"

"No. I...They're away again and..." Spencer looked up and Aria had to catch her breath when she saw the desire in her eyes. "You could stay? I'd like it if you stayed."

Aria still couldn't speak. She nodded and followed Spencer inside. Finally she found her voice as Spencer offered her a glass of wine. "Burgers and wine! We know how to live."

"Works for me." Spencer chuckled, Aria reached out a hand and pulled her girlfriend closer.

"You're beautiful."

"Mmm." Spencer moaned at the feel of Aria's lips against her neck. "we eat. Then more of that." She pulled back and sat opposite, neither of them were able to take their eyes off the other and the food was soon forgotten. The wine was another one of her Dad's good bottles. She knew it straight away, but it provided little distraction.

"Spencer..." Aria had had enough, she pushed her food away and stood up.

"Aria." Spencer chewed on her bottom lip, but her eyes gave away what she wanted.

A second passed, maybe less and Aria had pulled her up and mashed their lips together. Eagerly deepening the kiss, pulling her closer, her fingers wrapped in her hair.

"I want you." Her words came out as more of a growl and it made Spencer's knees go weak. She didn't have to worry, because Aria was gripping her tightly and never letting go.

When she woke the next morning she felt Aria's hand across her belly, anchoring her to the bed and slowly she tilted her head to see how beautiful the woman next to her was as she slept. She didn't know how long she'd been watching when Aria looked up, smiling as she blinked hard against the sunlight.

"Morning."

"Morning." Aria stretched and couldn't stifle a yawn.

"That was something else." Spencer's eyes sparkled as she recalled the night before.

"Our first full night together." Aria placed a kiss to Spencer's collar bone, then another to her neck.

"Yeah." Spencer exhaled as her eyes rolled back in her head. Aria's mouth was moving across her jaw, slowly kissing a path to her lips and she knew then that she couldn't have imagined a better way to wake up in the morning. She could feel her body drifting and then a tune filled the room and a sigh escaped her lips. "My mom." She grumbled, recognizing the ring immediately and knowing she couldn't ignore it.

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"I'm sorry." Spencer repeated as she walked Aria to the door a little while later.

"It's not your fault, it's probably a good thing they called and didn't just walk in on us."

"Probably." Spencer bit her bottom lip, but it didn't hide her smile. "When can I see you again?" Spencer's hands were snaking around Aria's hips and pulling her closer.

"Soon." Aria was helpless when Spencer looked at her like that. "Tomorrow?"

"Count on it." Spencer kissed her chastely and rushed back into the house. Her parents would be home any minute.

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The moment the sun came up on Sunday Aria reached for the phone to answer the call. They couldn't stay apart for long and Aria knew she'd be having an impact on Spencer's studies if she continued to fill her evenings and weekends like this, but right now as they lay together she couldn't seem to care. They'd gone back to the boat house. It was the most private place they knew and a place they both could relax. She'd tried to show some restraint and packed some food, but it was left untouched somewhere near the front door. The moment they'd walked inside Spencer had pushed her back into the wall and everything from that moment had been a blur as their bodies reacted instinctively to their inner most desires.

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Neither heard the car outside, or the steps towards the front door. They were lost in their passion for each other and even if their visitor had walked in banging a drum they probably wouldn't have noticed. The front door closed and the car drove away and neither would ever know, because in that moment Aria could only see and feel Spencer. In that moment they were the only two people on the earth.

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Aria fell back on the floor and stared up at the ceiling for a moment as she tried to catch her breath. "Wow!" she exhaled and turned to face the girl next to her. "I love you." She said softly, reaching out a hand and taking Spencer's. She felt like her heart could burst as she said the words that had been aching to get out and didn't expect a tear to fall from her eye at the confession, but she was overwhelmed with how much she felt and when Spencer kissed her softly, she thought she'd just about died. "you make me feel...I don't know, it's just good and warm and my heart feels happy. Is it okay to feel this good?" she shook a little as her hands cupped Spencer's cheeks, kissing her slowly, not wanting to forget how amazing this moment was. Not needing to hear a response.

"It's very okay." Spencer wrapped her hands around Aria's neck, their foreheads pressed together as she they broke from the kiss. "I love you." Spencer whispered against her lips.

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They didn't leave, they couldn't. Their limbs were knotted together as if they should always be that way and neither wanted to say goodbye until the last possible moment. It was a little too late when they did part and she knew Spencer's parents would begin asking questions if they carried on like this.

Aria walked slowly towards the front door, turning round to watch as Spencer drove home. The day had been the most perfect imaginable and she felt so happy, what was happening was amazing, but in the same breath she felt sad that the night had to come and take Spencer from her. This wasn't quite the relationship she'd imagined having at her age. Sneaking around, not being able to be open because her girlfriend was still in High School, but it was all she could ever want now.

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She entered the house expecting her Mom to be waiting on her, but instead it was her Dad's voice that she heard.

"Come and sit down." He called from the couch. Slowly she entered the room and sat down in the chair opposite him. He gestured to the bottle of scotch on the table and she nodded. Something told her she might need it.

The alcohol stung at the back of her throat, but she didn't show it, just looked up at him and waited.

"People are talking." His words were measured and she knew it was serious.

"About what?"

"It doesn't matter. I'll deal with the talk. I have a proposition for you."

She looked at him curiously. "Dad?"

"Aria." He stood up and paced back and forth, taking a deep breath. "I think it would be a good idea if you extended your teaching abilities. There is a job waiting for you. A better college, more money. It's in the South, but you know I think a change and some distance will do you good."

"Distance from what?"

"I think you know." He didn't hide his contempt.

"It's not a big deal. It's..." she stuttered, unable to process what was happening or how he knew. He'd seemed okay about her dating a woman.

"It's bigger than you will ever know. She's a Hastings, damn it." He spat out their family name as if it pained him and it took her by surprise.

"I don't get it." She shook her head, searching his face for answers, but he wasn't going to elaborate.

"You take the job. You do _that_." He drained his glass and quickly poured another. She'd not seen him like this before and wasn't sure what to say at first.

"You can't order me to take a job. You can't seriously want to send me away? I'll quit teaching, it really doesn't matter."

"It matters." He snapped. "You stay here and it will destroy this family. It will ruin that girl..." she flinched and she saw how he smiled slightly when he'd found her weakness. "and do you really want that, to take away the bright future she has?"

"No, of course I don't. Please, just tell me. Why?"

"Aria, you have to trust me." He at least attempted to sound solemn, but she wasn't buying into this. He'd never told her what to do before. None of this made sense.

"And If I stay?" she rubbed her temples, not really wanting to hear what he had to say anymore, she wanted to be back in that house, back in Spencer's arms.

"Spencer will be sent away and that family, those people, will make sure you never see her again. Trust me on that." He said with an authority that made her shiver. "Jail isn't somewhere I want my daughter to end up."

"Why? Why would they do that?"

"The Hastings don't think, they don't care or feel. They destroy anything that gets in their way. They'll see you prosecuted and they will ruin me. Just get out now. For her sake as well as yours."

"Fuck." Aria knocked the scotch back and let it sting. She sat back in the soft brown leather chair. It was aged and cracked and if she hadn't felt so stunned she would have curled into it just like she did as a girl and seek comfort in its familiarity. Byron grimaced at her language, but she had no apologies to offer, her language was the least of their worries. "she's not some little school girl, she's smart and clever and knows what she wants. They can't stop us."

"But they can and she _is_ a school girl." Byron interjected.

"Not for much longer." Aria tried to sound sure, but her voice cracked.

"It's not going to make any difference in some eyes and the end of the year is a long way away."

"Look, I'm not going to lose my job over this, so can we not?"

"If you weren't seeing her would you consider the job?" he looked at her knowingly and she couldn't answer, not now. "We'll talk tomorrow." He left her alone in the room and she grabbed the bottle off the table and poured herself another drink. It was going to be a long night.

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	15. Chapter 15

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Chapter 15:

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Aria's head didn't ache quite as much as she'd expected the next morning, but she felt sick in her stomach and it wasn't going anywhere fast. She'd felt an urge for old comforts and had joined her Mom in the kitchen, knowing her Dad would still be getting ready for work. It wasn't often that she ventured downstairs during her Mom's morning routine, she wasn't always prepared for the questions or the looks, or whatever her Mom felt like but today she was met with the fuss that she needed and within moments pancakes appeared like magic and a small smile returned to her face.

She didn't have to say anything at all and for that she was grateful. For in that brief moment she was still a girl that needed her Mom to love her, but didn't quite know how to tell her. Ella had always been good at reading her or perhaps her Mom knew exactly what was going on, she couldn't be sure. She didn't know how her Dad had found out it was Spencer and right now she didn't want to know. Her Mom was being her Mom and she didn't want it to stop, she needed this. To pretend. To feel secure.

When her Dad appeared he greeted them all warmly and Aria watched avidly for any reaction from her Mom, but none came. Thankfully she'd finished her breakfast by the time he placed a folder in front of her. Silently she went to her room and read it slowly. It contained details of the college. The salary. A place to live. It would mean she could clear her debts in a matter of months, not the years that stared back at her from her computer whenever she did her accounts. She would be free to start again and she knew the aging Dean had some of the best contacts in the art world. Perhaps it was a door to her future?

If it hadn't been for Spencer she'd have been on the first plane. Now she was being told she needed to go, she had to, but the thought of leaving was unimaginable. Yesterday, she had been bathed in a happiness she didn't know was possible. She'd thought she'd loved before, even been in love to the point she couldn't exist, but Spencer had changed everything. Everything was new and her life was different, she was happy. Spencer made her happy and yet, she couldn't help but feel terrified all at the same time.

Today she was lost. Her head full of thoughts that she wanted to shut out, but always coming to the same conclusion.

If she took the job then the pressure would be off. Her debt repaid. Her freedom returned. A ticket out of her parents home, but the price was not seeing Spencer. It only needed to be short term, she didn't plan to end things at all, but Spencer was 18 and she had a feeling that six months apart would seem a lot longer to her and a much bigger deal.

She kept reasoning that in six months Spencer would be out of Rosewood and they could carry on from there. It all kind of made sense. She didn't know who had got to her Dad, but he was frightened. It was bigger than her job, her career. The thought of Spencer being sent away, of them never being able to be together frightened her more than anything. She didn't want to ruin Spencer's life, she couldn't.

She felt like she had to protect them all, but wasn't sure how Spencer would see things. They had to talk and she knew it wouldn't be easy.

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All her thoughts and all the scenarios that she'd imagined had all made sense until she saw Spencer waiting by the lake.

"You're late." Spencer grinned, not bothered at all that she'd been left waiting, but then she stopped and Aria knew she'd not been able to hide it.

"We should talk." She spoke softly, but felt like she was screaming.

"Did something happen?" Spencer's happiness had been replaced by worry and it broke Aria's heart to see, but she knew it was about to get worse.

"Yes." She said flatly, sitting down next to Spencer, she stared out across the water for a moment and tried to find the words and the reasons, but it wasn't easy.

"Aria?" Spencer pressed after the silence had gone on too long.

"I'm leaving." She blurted out suddenly. It wasn't what she'd planned at all. She wanted to talk it out, but now she'd said it and that was her decision, she couldn't risk her job, but most importantly she couldn't wreck Spencer's life. Slowly she turned to face Spencer and tried to explain. "I love you. I want us, but someone has threatened my Dad, they've threatened all that we have and I have to go, it makes sense. There's a job and it's a really good job. I can start over and then..." she paused but Spencer wasn't saying a word. "Then we can be together. You'll graduate and I could transfer to a college or school near you and we could have a real chance, not this. I want what we have, for us to be together, but it's not meant to be like this. We shouldn't have to hide and sneak around. You know?" she waited, knowing her own words weren't really convincing herself and she'd heard this version or something similar several times already as she talked to herself in the mirror. She knew Spencer would think she was running again and she couldn't work out how to convince her otherwise, because in her heart she knew she was. She wasn't fighting. She couldn't. Leaving was easy. Staying was impossible.

"No." Spencer shook her head in disbelief. "I don't. I don't know. What the hell just happened?"

"It's the best thing, you have to see that. It'll take the heat off." She repeated the words she'd used to reason with herself when she'd made that call, but now they felt like lies.

"What heat? What does your Dad have to do with anything?" Spencer scowled. Her hands were balled up into fists and Aria couldn't miss the anger and frustration, she wanted to kiss it away, but couldn't. This was how it had to be. She had no right to kiss Spencer and pretend it was normal. It wasn't.

"He's my Dad and he's always looked out for me. He's scared and I am too. It makes sense." She repeated but her words trailed away.

"No. It really doesn't."

"Spencer, don't be difficult." She growled. Her frustration with herself seeping out and her patience wearing thin.

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"Fuck you!" Spencer stood up, she'd had enough of all this. "I want you!" she screamed. "I want you." She repeated a little more forlornly, her energy taken, her will drained. "and all you do is push me away. You can't make your mind up, then you tell me you love me. That this feels too good and now..." she shook her head, defeated.

"And I want you, I do, but..." Aria swallowed thickly and Spencer looked down at her on the bench, she didn't want to hear the rest, but it was going to be said, neither could stop it now. "Not like this. I don't want this, it's not meant to be this way and I can't do it anymore. I can't do this to you. If I stay it'll ruin your life, they would send you to some private school, take you away from your friends, from me. From your life. I can't let that happen. I can't be responsible."

"Why do you get to choose? Why is it always up to you?" Spencer kicked at the floor but it didn't ease her pain.

"Because it's my responsibility." Aria said dully but those lines had been rehashed so many times now and they sounded tired to them both.

"Bullshit." Spencer spat back. "you want...you love me! I know you do. How can you just turn your back on what we've got? How?"

"I do love you, I do and I'm not walking away, you have to see that."

"You really are." Spencer huffed incredulously.

"Maybe I am, maybe I shouldn't have gotten into this." Aria stood, exasperated. She had no idea how to make this okay now, it was already lost. " You're young, you can't be sure this is what you really want." Her words sounded as hollow as they felt.

"I'm not you! Why don't you get it, why?" Spencer looked up to the sky but found no answers.

"And I'm not 18. I can't do this. Life is bigger than this, than us."

"You don't mean that." Spencer grabbed her wrists as she bit back her tears. "You're scared. You've always been scared and it's sad, but you don't mean it."

"I should go." Aria stepped back, tears escaping her eyes, swiftly picking up her purse.

"You should." Spencer nodded her agreement and her body heaved forwards, she was too tired to do this now, too tired of all of it. "just know this isn't it...I'm not giving up." She held Aria's gaze for a moment, but the tiny brunette had no answer. She just looked back sorrowfully and walked back towards her car. A cool breeze whisked across the lake and left a painfully icy kiss on Spencer's tear stained cheeks at the exact moment she felt her heart break.

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Aria called her the next day and the one after, but her messages weren't returned and when she showed up at the house there was no answer.

She'd messed up and now Spencer didn't want to know and tomorrow she was leaving town. She hated it being like this. Ending it this way. It didn't have to end. She hadn't wanted that at all, but she'd said things she couldn't take back and now it was too late. She couldn't make it right because she was still convinced that leaving was the right thing to do. The relief on her Dad's face only confirmed that.

This was big. Bigger than she wanted to know and although Spencer was angry, Aria could only hope that it'd pass and soon they'd reconcile. That was why she was going, that was what she wanted. She wanted a future, she wanted them together. Spencer just couldn't see it right now.

"You okay?" Ella was stood in her bedroom doorway and she wondered how long she'd been watching her.

"Yeah." She half attempted a smile.

"Because you seem pretty low for someone who's on the cusp of something amazing. You do want this job right?"

"I do. It's amazing and such a great opportunity and..."

"I'm guessing Spencer didn't take it too well?"

Aria looked up at her Mom, surprised that it was something she'd say, that some acceptance of their relationship was being shown. "She's not talking to me. Doesn't get it."

"She'll figure it out and she'll be fine. It's going to be all study for her soon. This is a really, really important time. I think it's best she focusses on school. You're proving somewhat of a distraction."

"She's struggling?" Aria felt the guilt immediately

"No, she's Spencer. She'll get good grades without trying, but her other teachers have noticed that she's just making the minimum lately and that's not what she's about, never has been."

"I know."

"So maybe it'll be for the best?"

"I'm going to miss her and right now she hates me."

"She loves you. Any fool can see that."

"Maybe thats the problem. Dad seems worried."

"What does your father have to do with this? I didn't realize he knew about you two."

"You didn't?" Aria was surprised, but it only worried her more that Byron was keeping secrets. "You'll keep an eye on her? Please." Aria pleaded.

"Of course I will. Aria..." her Mom sat down on the bed and wrapped an arm around her daughters shoulders. "I'm going to miss you, but I think it's for the best."

"I don't know anything anymore." She got up and threw another shirt in her bag and knew her attempt at packing was turning into a disaster. She didn't want to go.

"And if she begged you to stay?" Ella asked after watching Aria continue her aimless packing.

"Why would you ask me that Mom?"

"Curiosity." Ella shrugged, but waited patiently for an answer.

"I'd go." Aria sighed. "It's the right thing for me and for her. Maybe we're meant to be together, but...there is always a but, a maybe."

"You're doing the right thing." Ella pulled her into a hug. "You are."

Aria cried properly for the first time since the lake and her Mom held her.

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The next morning she set out on the long drive south. She could only hope that by the time she reached her destination that her thoughts would be focussed on her new opportunity but she doubted they'd shift from Spencer that easily.

She'd tried one last time that morning and thought she'd seen Spencer at the window, but it was just a trick of the light. She was either brave or foolish to be stood on that doorstep and she wasn't quite sure which it was when Veronica Hastings greeted her and explained Spencer was at a friends. She made some excuse that probably didn't measure up but Spencer's Mom had bought it and now she was crossing state lines. She had to carry on.

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"You should have talked to her." Hanna rolled her eyes.

"She broke my heart." Spencer rolled her eyes back.

"She took a new job."

"It's not that simple. She could have talked, she's running. She's always running. She said she loved me and then she leaves!"

"Did you ask her to stay?" Hanna always made it all sound so simple.

"What difference would it make?"

"I don't know, maybe she would have stayed? She loves you."

"Hanna." Emily walked back in the room with a tray of drinks. "Spencer needs to get drunk and forget."

"Spencer needs to talk and figure things out." Hanna replied curtly.

"Spencer needs to go home and sit in her room listening to sad songs and not her two friends." Spencer cut in.

"Oh wow. This is bad." Emily laughed, handing them both a shot and a beer. "My Mom is out of town. Tonight we get wasted." She held Spencer's gaze meaningfully.

"I'm in." Spencer took the glass and drained it in one swift motion. She didn't want to be alone and alcohol would definitely soften the blows Hanna was dishing out inadvertently.

The night passed in a blur. She cried. She threw up. She cried again. She talked. At some point she laughed, but when her head hit the pillow the only thing she knew for certain was that she loved Aria. What Hanna had said had left her with questions. Maybe she should have asked her to stay, but what if she'd gone anyway? It hurt. She hurt.

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Aria called every day for the first two weeks. Spencer picked up the messages and listened to her voice, trying to remember why they had to be apart. She never answered and eventually Aria stopped leaving a message. Just rung once at night. Every night.

The days passed and she spent them mostly absorbed in school work in an attempt to block out her pain. After a week she'd concluded that it was her own fault for letting Aria's doubts win. Most of those doubts had been implanted by Ella Montgomery and Spencer couldn't help but scowl at the woman whenever she saw her in the corridor, which seemed to be a lot lately. In fact she was beginning to think that Mrs Montgomery was spying on her.

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Spencer had to prove them all wrong. Prove she was old enough to know her heart and strong enough to fight for it. Although fighting wasn't so easy right now and she felt too bruised, but she knew that a time would come and she was ready for it.

She was going to work hard. Get the grades she deserved and take that start in life that she had on offer.

She wasn't going to wait around, waiting for a time when Aria thought it was right. For Aria to make all the decisions. She wasn't going to wait. That was the plan, but another month passed and although she'd managed to pick up her school work, she'd not managed to stop thinking about Aria, despite all her best intentions about not waiting.

It was another Friday at Emily's and the cycle of drink, tears and more tears was on repeat. She'd started drunk dialing Aria's cell, but hung up before it was answered. She'd blocked her number so that Aria wouldn't know it was her, but somehow she guessed she'd figure it out.

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Emily wasn't drinking, she'd stopped after the third time Spencer had done this and now just listened. Tonight she didn't say much at all. She watched her best friend going through the motions, but nothing seemed to make it better. Time would help, eventually she'd get over Aria. Emily knew that, but it seemed like a long way to go and it didn't seem like the right answer either. She'd seen the way Aria looked at Spencer and she knew they'd both been ridiculously happy. Sickeningly so at times.

Her mind was made up. She had to do something.

The next morning she dropped Spencer at home and drove along an unfamiliar path until she reached the address she'd gotten from Mike.

Knocking the door twice, she waited, impatiently kicking at the dust beneath her shoes. She was tired and it had been a long drive. Finally she heard the lock turn.

Aria pulled the door open slowly, when she recognized Emily she was clearly thrown, looking around her desperately to see if Spencer was here too.

"Oh god, what's happened?"

"We need to talk." Emily replied, ignoring the fear and worry on the older woman's face and stepping inside before Aria could invite her.

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When Aria arrived in the room, just seconds behind Emily, she was a little less flustered but still concerned. "Is Spencer?...is she?..."

"It's good to see you too." Emily quipped.

"You showed up on my door. I'm not exactly local! How did you get here?"

"I drove."

"Alone?"

"Yes, look it's Spencer. I don't..." Emily started but Aria was fussing around now. As if she didn't want to hear what Emily had to say at all.

"You'll need some food, a drink." She began pulling cups and plates from the cupboard, before routing out anything edible in the refrigerator.

"Aria." Emily crossed the room, until Aria had no choice but to look at her.

"Just tell me." Aria closed her eyes, scared to hear what had happened.

"She's not hurt. Well, she is hurt, but it's not that. She misses you and I don't know why she won't talk to you or tell you and it's been over a month and she's still a mess and I don't know what to do anymore. I can't watch her falling apart, I have to help her."

"I'm sorry." Aria was relieved Spencer wasn't laying in a hospital bed somewhere, but she wasn't ready to hear that she was a mess. She'd missed her every single day since she'd left. Her first pay check had cleared, her new life was in progress but it felt so hollow. She'd barely eaten in weeks. Her social life was nonexistent and she didn't care. She worked. She painted. She slept. The whole apartment was covered in her work and Emily was now looking at it with interest.

"You're talented."

"I'm..." Aria started but didn't want to say it. She didn't want to tell Emily that she was broken, that was what it said in all her paintings. Emily couldn't see it though.

"Why did you leave?"

"I got a job. Things happen. I didn't mean it to be like this."

"So come back." Emily said plainly. She imagined Hanna would be proud of her for seeing how simple it could be.

"I can't."

"Yes, you can. You've got a car. Two legs. You love Spencer. Come back. Tell her and make it all better."

"You think it's that simple?" Aria sighed, the weight of her worries hitting her heart.

"I think you could make it that way. Spencer doesn't get why you had to go. She told me about your Dad and it's crazy. Just be who you are and stop listening to everyone else."

"My parents gave me another chance. I'd messed up and not listened to them. I owe them and so when my Dad asks me to go..." Aria hung her head at her own pathetic verse.

"Oh come on!" Emily rolled her eyes. She'd heard from Spencer that Aria could do this.

"What do I do?" Aria gave in and was looking at Emily as if she might have the answer. Her weakness on show and Emily had no choice but to soften, but only for a moment.

"You fight for her." She said with a conviction that made Aria sit up.

"How?"

"You go back to Rosewood and you fight. You don't listen to people telling you it's wrong, you show Spencer that it counts, that she is all that matters and then you work on it."

"And she'll take me back?"

"Maybe. I don't know. I don't think it'll be easy for you. You do love her?"

"I do." Aria nodded. "So very much."

"Then show her and stop doing this. It's no good for either of you." Emily waved a hand over Aria's skeletal figure, pointing out the obvious.

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It was late by the time Emily took the blankets Aria offered. A few minutes later and she was passed out on the couch. It had been a crazy day and she was drained. They'd talked some more but she couldn't be sure if it'd make a difference but she'd done what she needed to do. Setting her alarm, she decided four hours would be enough. It was still dark when the sound filled the room. She'd done what she needed to do and goodbyes weren't necessary. She crept out and started the engine on her car. She was back in Rosewood by midmorning and headed straight to Paige's.

"You ok?" her girlfriend pulled her into a tight hug.

"I need a hot shower and a strong coffee."

"How was she? I was worried."

"She was...I don't know." Emily scrunched up her face. "She was kind and caring and sad. When I saw her before she always seemed, you know, focussed on Spencer or something. Last night it felt different."

"Does she still care?"

"Yes, she loves her."

"What's she going to do?"

"She asked me that. Asked me what she should do." Emily shook her head incredulously.

"And what did you say?" Paige looked at her, waiting for an answer.

"I told her she needed to fight for her. She wants Spencer, then she has to come and get her. She can't keep walking away. I'm not sure if I've done the right thing, but I had to try." Emily felt a wave of exhaustion take over her body, but at the same moment, Paige's lips were kissing hers and waking her up. "what's that for?" she asked when her girlfriend eased her assault.

"Because you are amazing and I'm lucky to have you and so is Spencer. I hope Aria listens, I hope she can see it too."

"Me too." Emily agreed, but her desires had been stirred and for now thoughts of Spencer and Aria could wait. She needed Paige.

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	16. Chapter 16

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Chapter 16:

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Emily waited and waited, she didn't know what else she could do now. She watched as Spencer tried to deal and she wondered why she'd not heard from Aria. As the days became weeks she figured that her trip may have been a final nail in the coffin. Aria clearly wasn't the person she'd thought and now it was up to her to fix her friend. She still had no idea how though.

Spencer had been pretending she was fine, better than fine. She'd passed every test, made every deadline as expected, but if you looked closely it was obvious. School was nearing an end and Spencer was still nursing her wounds. Emily knew and she had a feeling there were probably others that could see it too. Ella Montgomery had softened as they entered that last semester and Emily hadn't missed the care she took around Spencer. It almost made Emily want to drive that route again and to drag Aria back here, show her what she was missing, but she couldn't. If Aria didn't do this herself then there was no point. It was over.

Somehow she had to find a way to tell Spencer what she'd done. Help her move on. Yet, it was easier to live in Spencer's world, where no one talked about it anymore and everyone pretended she was okay.

Emily sighed and Spencer looked at her curiously. "What's with you Ms Fields?"

"Nothing. Just tired. Very tired." her head hurt and she couldn't pretend she was okay right now.

"Well, you'd better perk up. We've got a party to go to!" Spencer twirled and Emily smiled back, trying to muster some enthusiasm. They were at Spencer's house getting ready for the Masked ball. It should have been the perfect opportunity for them all to have one last hurrah before they graduated and suddenly Emily realized that is exactly what it needed to be. It had to be.

Her friend wanted a night of fun and with all talk of Aria banned it shouldn't be hard. One last night, one last goodbye. Emily was Spencer's best friend, the person she needed right now, the one that could make her feel alright.

She quickly got over her funk and began getting ready, a smile on her face as she watched Spencer enjoy the moment.

"This is amazing." Spencer beamed as they walked into the hall an hour or so later. "Everyone, everything. Just amazing."

"I'm going to miss it. How about you?" Emily chewed her bottom lip as she surveyed the room, trying to drink in every last moment of their high school lives.

"A little. I'm looking forward to something new though. Getting out of here and..."

"Leaving the past behind?" Emily smiled sadly and Spencer returned it, but the sadness in her eyes was too much for Emily and all too familiar lately. "I want to dance with you." Emily remembered her promise to make this a fun night and took Spencer's hand and led her out onto the floor.

"Em, really. You don't have to do this. Be with Paige. I'm happy. I am."

"And I'm happy dancing with my best friend. So don't try to stop me."

Spencer laughed, but the sound Emily had missed stopped short and she looked up suddenly to see Spencer's focus was no longer her. Her friends breathing was stilted and she could feel her hand tightening it's grip around her waist.

"You mind if I take over?" A shaky voice broke the stare off and Emily didn't even look over her shoulder. She didn't have to. She dropped Spencer's hand and walked away without another word. Desperately trying not to let her own emotions take over, but honestly she felt a little giddy. This was it. This is what she'd been waiting for. The gesture. The moment. Maybe Aria was the person she thought she was after all. She hoped she was right, because the look on Spencer's face, the way she trembled in Emily's arms said she had to be. Aria had to be the one.

She was still a little stunned, watching the two women, when Paige grabbed her from the edge of the dance floor. "Is that her?" her girlfriend prodded, uncertain because of the mask Aria was wearing.

"Yes." Emily felt herself well up as she looked back to where she had been standing. Spencer hadn't moved. She was just looking at Aria. It was as if no one else was in the room and Emily felt a little guilty for watching, for intruding, but she couldn't stop.

xoxo

"Hey." Aria let out a breath as she spoke but it didn't calm her nerves. Spencer was just staring at her and she could see a whole range of emotions flash behind the eyes that had once just shown love. Now she could see traces of hurt, the hurt she'd caused. "I had a whole speech planned, but I suck at them, so here I am. I just...Spencer?"

"Can we just dance?" Spencer reached out her hand tentatively and Aria took it.

Spencer couldn't believe what was happening. One minute she was with Emily. The next she was in Aria's arms, moving around the dance floor as if it was normal. As if they'd not spent the last few months apart. That her heart hadn't ached every single minute of every day. That it hadn't been broken. With Aria holding her, dancing with her she didn't need to remember the pain.

They didn't speak, she couldn't find words. Just moved and held each other.

The song finished and Spencer stopped, looking at Aria for answers, struggling to find words to form the questions swimming around her head. This wasn't right. She couldn't process at all, so without a word she walked from the dance floor, not looking back as she made her way outside into the cool night air. She could hear Aria's footsteps behind her, trying to keep up with her fast pace.

"Spencer, Can we talk?" Aria had been waiting patiently behind her, not wanting to push, but they'd been out here for what felt like hours, even though it was probably only minutes.

"Why are you here?" she finally asked.

"Because I want you. I want you back, I want to do this. I _can_ do this and I'm going to fight for you. Emily told me to fight and she was right and I can do that. I have to, because It's broken me not being with you. Hurting you like that. If you can forgive me then..." Aria swallowed thickly. "I've made too many excuses and stopped this happening for the wrong reasons. I'm so sorry for that. I won't do it again. I could never do it again. I've always felt like I'm meant to be the responsible one and it turns out _I_ made all the mistakes. Leaving here, leaving you. I make mistakes. So many, but you aren't one of them."

Aria could feel her heart pounding against her ribs and she was sure Spencer could hear it. The night was still and a slight chill brushed against her skin as she waited, looking hopefully at the girl she loved beyond reason.

"I missed you." Spencer whispered, slowly meeting Aria's eyes, she smiled softly and it melted Aria's heart.

"I'm not leaving again, not if you say yes. Say you'll have me back? I love you Spencer. I love you." Aria's hands were cupping Spencer's cheeks and wiping a tear that Spencer hadn't realized was there. "Don't cry. I'm here." She whispered and pulled Spencer into her arms.

Spencer closed her eyes tightly and let herself sink into the embrace. She'd missed this, missed Aria and she couldn't explain why she felt so safe. Why it felt right to just let go, to forget everything and to be with Aria again as if nothing had happened. She didn't want to make her pay, she could never seek revenge or make the woman holding her beg. She loved Aria. She'd not stopped, she didn't think it would be possible.

In that moment, she knew it was right. Aria had finally worked it out, she'd made a decision. She'd chosen Spencer and Spencer knew that was it. She wouldn't back out now. Waiting for Aria to get here was worth it, because she was here and she wouldn't ever go back. Aria made her complete.

"I need you." Spencer's voice cracked as she spoke and Aria tried to shush her but she didn't stop. "I missed you. So much. Don't go again?" she half asked, half pleaded. Unable to fight the urge for reassurance.

"I'm not going anywhere." Aria nodded earnestly. "I want us to talk. Need you to know I'm serious, all those things and for you to be sure. Tomorrow I want to take you home, tell my parents and leave them to deal. They'll have to. Everyone will have to. I want you."

"And tonight?"

"Just me, you and a room full of your classmates is the only place I want to be right now."

"Sounds perfect." Spencer smiled and Aria returned it with interest. "You lost weight?" Spencer ran a finger across Aria's cheekbone.

"A little." Aria ducked her head. "You know any good places to eat?" she joked and suddenly her heart felt free again. Spencer's laugh made her feel whole. "I heard you've been drinking?"

"Emily told you?"

"She's a good friend to you. We've finally found we have something in common too."

"What's that?"

"We both care about you. Do anything for you. She's got some guts, driving out to see me on her own like that."

"She's did?" Spencer couldn't believe Emily would do that and as she walked back into the crowd of students, her hand clasped around Aria's, she immediately sought out her friends eyes and smiled when she saw Emily watching her. Her friends nerves palpable even from a distance. She mouthed a 'thank you' and really knew she had to say so much more because she'd never been more grateful that Emily was her friend right now. She could never thank her enough.

"You want to dance with me?" Aria asked hesitantly. Removing her mask, she didn't need to hide now, didn't want to.

"I do."

The moment Aria took Spencer's hand. A familiar jolt sparked between their bodies as they moved in time to the music. Soon they were dancing their own dance, in a world of their own. Oblivious to the watching eyes. The risks that had once mattered were soon forgotten. Spencer looked down into Aria's eyes and smiled. "This feels good." She whispered.

"It feels right." Aria agreed. She hadn't dare hope that this is how it would turn out, but she couldn't have been happier. She knew she had a lot of making up to do. Knew that Spencer was being strong and pretending it didn't matter, but it did. She was going to prove how much she cared and make sure Spencer never doubted her again.

"I graduate in two weeks." Spencer felt her chest heave as she looked at Aria. Hope of what could be taking over her body.

"I've got an interview next week it's close to you. I mean you should still live on campus and we could start to date, start again. No pressure. No stupid fears from me. A real chance. A new start."

"So we can do this?"

"We'll find a way. We have to because it's been hell being apart."

"Tell me about it! Lets get out of here." Spencer grabbed her hand and in a heartbeat they were gone, leaving a room full of whispers behind them.

xoxo

"So, what about your Dad?" Spencer had been sat staring into the distance for too long. She was still holding Aria's hand and felt a thumb rub across her palm reassuringly. She looked up to see Aria watching her and felt her breath hitch at the look in the older woman's eyes.

"I want you Spencer and I'm going to keep saying it, keep telling you because that is all that matters to me. I didn't leave because of him. It influenced my decision, no doubt. I left because I thought it'd give us a chance and I didn't stay to explain that. I lost it, I ran my mouth and then I ran and I can't hide that or lie to you. I was scared, I've always been scared. What we have...it was so intense and..."

"You always freaked out."

"But I'm back and I'm not freaking out. I'm not going to again."

"I know." Spencer nodded.

"You do?" Aria looked so hopeful that Spencer had to fight the urge to hug her and kiss her doubts away.

"Yes, I don't know why, but I couldn't stop thinking, stop hoping. It had to be up to you to come back, to work it out. I knew what I wanted. I've always known and that isn't going to change. I've nothing to lose, you had a lot and..."

"I almost lost the one thing that really matters though. I'm an idiot."

"Almost. You didn't lose me." Spencer reached out with her free hand and gently caressed Aria's cheek. Slowly pulling her into a kiss that made her whole body feel like it was on fire. She moved her hands gripping Aria's shoulders lightly and pressing their lips closer together, letting them glide as one until Aria's tongue was dancing with hers and she remembered all that she had been missing.

A kiss could mean so much, help her to forget everything, and Aria definitely had that power over her. Every time they kissed Spencer felt like her feet left the ground, her mind didn't function much past her wants. Tonight she tried to remain controlled. Pulling away as she sought air, she looked at Aria and for some reason burst into a fit of giggles. Aria watched her, perplexed for a moment, and then gave in and laughed too.

xoxo

"I should get you home." Aria didn't hide the pain in her expression, she didn't want to go. Wanted this moment to last.

"Or we could stay out all night? My parents don't expect me home. It's prom night."

"They don't? You had a date? I mean they're cool with that?" Aria knotted her brow together, trying to figure out why exactly Spencer's parents would be okay with her staying out all night. It was Prom, this was not a night for the Hastings to be relaxed.

"Emily was my date I suppose."

"She's not with Paige anymore?" Aria could barely breathe. "You two..." Aria's face was a treat and Spencer couldn't help but laugh.

"I think you know that what you're saying is crazy and at some point your brain is going to catch up with your mouth."

Aria rested her head in her hands, before looking up coyly. "You don't even want to know about the things that have been going through my head since I left here." she shook her head vigourously. "Crazy!"

"Snap." Spencer rubbed Aria's back reassuringly.

"I never. There wasn't anyone. I..." Aria added as if her life depended on it. "Never."

"Me either." Spencer smiled shyly. Taken aback by Aria's vulnerability. "and now we're here. Me and you and together and...it's getting a little dark and a lot cold."

"You could come back to mine." Aria said assertively. She'd explain to her parents the next day, she'd already planned on letting them know she wasn't playing along anymore.

"How about no?" Spencer grimaced. "No offense, but your Mom...not good."

"You're right. We could get a room. I mean if you wanted?" Aria was all too aware of how that sounded. "To talk and catch up. We could talk. We..." her cheeks were tinged red as she tried to explain.

"Come to the boat house?" Spencer cut her off as the idea crossed her mind.

"Really?"

"I have to go. I should probably be there already. Theres a party. My party I guess, so...?"

"Oh." Aria's smile faded. "I can drop you there. I don't want to keep you from your friends, not after everything and..."

"You can come in. Please? I'd like that." Spencer nodded. "I really would."

"You're sure? I don't want to be in the way, it's the end of high school and..."

"The beginning of what _we_ can be. So I'm sure. Definitely sure."

xoxo

Aria walked into the room tentatively and couldn't hide her relief when she saw only Spencer's closest friends scattered around the room chatting. They didn't all turn and stare, most of them paid the arriving couple little attention at all.

It wasn't the wild party she'd remembered from when Melissa used to invite her whole class out here at all. Emily smiled at her and she returned it. She wasn't sure when or if they'd be friends, but she was as glad for Emily as Spencer was right now.

Hanna showed less restraint. Squealing when she saw their linked hands before skipping towards the pair. Overjoyed that they were back together and somehow it was that small gesture that made it all feel complete.

Spencer barely left her side for the rest of the night and when they finally settled into each others arms, she just listened as Spencer's breathing eased. Watching her sleep, Aria thought of all the mistakes she'd made. There'd been so many. She knew she'd make more, it was inevitable, but she also knew she'd never let Spencer go again, ever.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17:

xoxo

The dream reunion was complete. Spencer made them breakfast, Hanna tried to resist but gave in and had seconds. Emily and Paige were wrapped together in the corner talking quietly and Aria could only imagine that the impending end of High school and the tickets out of Rosewood were making them enjoy every last moment together. She was lucky. She had a chance and experience and she could follow Spencer.

The interview next week was just a formality, she'd already been virtually offered the job and had impeccable references. Her lack of lust for life outside of school had meant she stayed focussed. The professor she'd been covering for would return for the new academic year and her boss had promised to find her any work she wanted because she'd made such a good impression. She knew exactly what she wanted and where she needed to go. It was perfect, especially when she heard about an opening at a private school not 30 minutes from where Spencer would be studying.

It was a gamble she'd been more than happy to take. Somehow she was determined to be a part of Spencer's life again. Now it was working out better than expected, it really did feel like a dream and then Spencer was walking her to her car and a soft kiss made her wake up and realize it was real. It was real and Spencer was still here, they still had each other.

xoxo

Spencer let out a puff of air as she watched Aria drive home. She couldn't believe this was happening, that Aria had returned for her and returned with promises of a future. They had a chance and she couldn't hide the grin from her face as she walked back into the boat house.

"I like that smile. I like it very much." Emily took her hand and walked her out to the back porch. "is she staying?"

"She's..." Spencer shook her head, she still couldn't quite believe it. "She's back, but we're leaving together."

"And going where?" Emily looked a little startled. "no you can't just run, I mean...you've got college and she can't just take you away from me."

"I'm going to college and she's coming too and you will visit me as promised and we'll be friends forever. I have so much to thank you for, she told me what you did, what you said."

"I shouldn't have had to say it though." Emily shrugged, she wasn't completely won over by Aria and Spencer wouldn't have expected anything less. "You trust her?"

"I do."

"She breaks you again and..." Emily raised an eyebrow, her lips pursed.

"I know." Spencer gripped Emily's hand tightly. "I know. Aria knows too I reckon."

"I love you Spence."

"Love you too, Em." Spencer grabbed her best friend and hugged her tightly. "Thank you."

"So what's next?"

"I go home. Carry on for a few weeks. Aria finishes the term. Then we...I don't know but we start again."

"And you're going to tell your parents? Her parents?"

"She's telling them today. Then we can talk to mine. I don't think it'll be easy, but I'm ready, you know?"

"I'm happy for you." Emily pulled her into another hug and Spencer was happy too, she couldn't imagine being happier.

xoxo

When Aria arrived home the next morning she saw Ezra standing idly by a car she didn't recognize and wondered just what he was doing here at this time of day. It had been months since she'd left Hollis. Before she could ask him, or even say hello, the front door swung open and her eyes were drawn towards Melissa. She'd not seen her in years, not once since she'd been with Spencer. Her eyes narrowed instantly. Melissa had always been trouble and the smug smile on her face said it all.

"Aria!" she greeted her warmly, but Aria didn't miss they icy glare behind that smile. "I think you know my fiancé?"

"Your what?" Aria's jaw dropped as she turned to look at Ezra. He was shuffling his feet from side to side, clearly a little uncomfortable at the situation.

"Isn't he lovely. I'm surprised you never made it work with him, but I guess you were too busy _fucking_ my sister." The venom that tinged her final words woke Aria from her stupor.

"The what? Oh god. Shit. Look I don't see what that has to do with you." She countered, wishing she'd been prepared for this, but she could never be prepared. Her words were met with a cold laugh from the woman opposite her.

"I'm just protecting my family. You should offer yours the same courtesy don't you think? Come on Ezra darling. I need to get away from this place. Two visits in one year is quite enough."

"Sure. It was nice seeing you Aria." His words were lost on Aria and she wondered just how stupid he was.

"You? Why? Why would you do that to Spencer? To me? To my Dad?"

"I told you." Melissa half shrugged. "I take care of my family. So take some friendly advice?" She stepped closer to Aria and towered over her small frame. "Leave now."

"Or what?"

"Or your silly little career is over. Your Dad's too and my dear sister will be off to the finest finishing school in Europe. She could do with a summer vacation and..."

Aria didn't respond, she couldn't say another word. She walked into the house and sought out her Dad.

"What did you do?" She growled at him.

"Me? I told you to stay away! I warned you." He was completely flustered, but Aria was past caring about him now.

"This is about you too, how can she ruin you?"

"Your Dad had an affair." Ella said calmly as she entered the room, taking a seat on the old couch that her Dad couldn't bare to part with. Aria watched as her Mom eyed it with the same distain as ever and it seemed strange to Aria considering what she'd just revealed.

"With Melissa?" Aria was wide eyed, she couldn't believe it.

"No." Byron rubbed his eyes and collapsed into the arm chair, exhausted.

"It was a friend of hers. Melissa found out. She has some video or photos or something...is that right Byron?" Ella was still cold as she turned on her husband. "and turns out the girl was underage and your father...well...he's..."

"Melissa says, but it's not true. Were you listening in?" Byron stopped his wife from elaborating further.

"I think I have a right to know what you're being blackmailed for. You think I haven't noticed the calls these last few months, since my Aria suddenly leaves town? I've not seen Melissa for years and then she turns up here this morning...like she owns the place. Owns you!"

"I'm sorry." He sounded as pathetic as he looked and Aria didn't get it, didn't know why her Mom wasn't trying to kill him or something.

"Mom finds out you cheated on her and that's all you have to say?"

"I've known for years...about the affair that is. I didn't know what Melissa was doing until today. I should have. She's not the girl I thought..." Ella looked at her daughter sadly. "you were right, I should have listened to you."

"She looked up to you though right? Can't you talk to her? I can't lose Spencer. Mom?"

"I wish I could." Ella took Aria's hand and squeezed it lightly. "I really do."

"So what happens?"

"You leave now. Break it off with Spencer and Melissa will soon forget. She'll be married and..." Byron was alert again, he knew how he wanted this to play out.

"I'm not breaking it off with Spencer. There's no way."

"You have too." Byron pleaded.

"You lose either way." Ella added sadly.

"I'm not ending it. Not now. Not this time."

"Call her." Ella passed Aria the phone. "Tell her to come here. We can talk. All of us. I'm sure Spencer will understand. She wouldn't want you to lose the chance you have. You need this, this job. Aria you have to see it's for the best."

"No." Aria shook her head stubbornly. This wasn't happening.

"Aria, Melissa is...she's evil and she will ruin her sister if she has too. She doesn't think, she destroys." Byron tried to reason. "I've seen that family at work, her Dad. They're not good people."

"You're lying." Aria didn't want to hear it, couldn't hear it. "I can't." She stood up and for a moment looked at her Mom, but she couldn't see what she needed. Without another word she left. She had to see Spencer.

xoxo

Just over an hour later Aria walked back into the Montgomery home. It didn't feel like home now and she couldn't imagine it ever would again. It was cold and empty. Her parents were in the same seats as when she left. She didn't hide the tears as her Mom tried to talk to her. "Are you happy now?" she spat at them both before returning to her room and packing the few clothes she'd unpacked the day before.

"Please don't be like this." Ella called to her as she made her way out the door.

"It's the only way I can be right now." Aria paused for a moment, looking back at her Mom sadly. She couldn't move. She had to do this. "I've got to go." She whispered before slamming the door closed and quickly racing to her car.

Her wheels skidded as she made the fastest escape she could before her tears spilled. She didn't want it to be this way, but they'd left her little choice. Driving non stop until the next town, she settled at a diner and ordered a coffee. It offered little comfort as she watched the world pass outside the window and wondered why her life could never be simple.

"It's not fun if it's simple." Spencer had smiled at her only hours earlier. How she wished she was here now.

xoxo

The dust had barely settled from Aria's spinning wheels, when Spencer drove erratically towards the Montgomery residence. A car hot on her tail and before she made it to the door, Melissa had appeared, Screaming at her to stop.

"Spencer, you need to go home."

It was enough to stop Spencer's angry march towards the front door.

"The fuck are you doing here Melissa?" she scowled at her older sister.

"Saving you from embarrassing yourself." Melissa tried to grab Spencer's arm and drag her away. "I know. I know everything and I heard what Aria said to you just now, you have to let her go. Leave this alone."

"You're listening in to my private conversations now? Where were you hiding?"

"You were practically shouting. They'd have heard you in the next county if Aria hadn't stopped you."

"Stopped me? She..." Spencer looked back towards the house. Melissa couldn't stop her now. "I need to see her. I need Aria. ARIA!" she shouted out her name, trying to get near the house. Byron opened the door and watched the scene in front of him for a moment.

"You'd better both come in." Ella said calmly as she appeared at his side. Pursing her lips for a moment as she made eye contact with Melissa.

"Where is she?" Spencer pleaded with Ella, shaking her sister's grip and ignoring Byron.

"She's gone. Oh, Spencer, I'm so sorry." Ella took her hand and led her into the kitchen. Spencer couldn't fight the over familiarity from Aria's Mom now, she was the last connection left in Rosewood and she needed her for this.

Byron stared at Melissa for a moment before following them into the house. Melissa didn't think twice before following him. Spencer didn't doubt for a moment that her sister cared for her, it was pretty obvious Melissa was only here to witness Spencer's meltdown first hand.

"Are you happy now?" Spencer rounded on her angrily as she thought of the reasons why she was here.

This wasn't how today was supposed to be. She was supposed to be here, in this house, but not like this. Not with Aria absent. Not in this state. It was the first day of their future and it was being wasted on tears, fights and anger. She couldn't see another way though. This was just how their life would be.

"It's for the best Spencer. She's a teacher and you're just a kid." Melissa stepped closer, but shrunk back when Spencer waved her hand dismissively. "She took advantage of her position. It's what this family do." Melissa's eyes were now fixed on Byron as she tried another form of attack.

"Oh fuck off!" Spencer spat back. She couldn't miss the way Ella was trying to hide a smile at that outburst. She was a little shocked, at the least she'd expected a scowl or even to be admonished.

"Whatever you want Spencer. I'm just happy that Aria has left and you can get on with your life. You can have a great life. One away from here. Away from that woman."

"Oh great well at least someones happy." Ella's sarcasm cut into the sisters argument. "My daughter has left town and I see two broken hearts, but you're happy. So lets all sing and dance, because everyone knows that the world is good if Melissa is _happy!" _ Ella didn't hide her anger well and Spencer half wanted to applaud her.

"Ella, we're friends." Melissa's tone was so condescending that Spencer was surprised they didn't all puke.

"We're not. You played me, like you play everyone. God help Ezra, he doesn't deserve someone as evil as you." Ella sighed, but she really didn't care.

"Ezra and I are perfect." Melissa stood proud.

"You really are." Byron let out a puff of air from his cheeks. He could barely keep up.

"And now you're going to stop blackmailing my husband?" Ella stretched out a hand as if Melissa was about to hand over a brown envelope full of incriminating evidence.

"You have my word." Melissa shrugged.

"I want the pictures." Ella pressed.

"Fine." Melissa huffed angrily and passed over the memory card she'd been keeping safe.

Ella went to throw it in the trash but Spencer grabbed it from her, not trusting her sister at all. She plugged it into Mike's laptop that had been left on the counter and was relieved to see it wasn't fake. She quickly deleted the images when she saw the pain creep across Ella's face. An old wound had been opened and no one could fix it now. She hated her sister a little more just for that.

"You're a bitch." Spencer turned her back on Melissa and walked out of the Montgomery house, realizing that she may never return. It felt so surreal in that moment and she found herself staring back at it for a moment. Her reverie broken when Ella came rushing out after her. Their conversation was hurried and then Ella was gone.

xoxo

Spencer was trying to digest when Melissa appeared. Her sister couldn't look her in the eye as she walked back to her car.

"That's it?" Spencer couldn't leave it though, she could never let Melissa walk away thinking she'd won.

"It's for the best. You don't need to mess your life up and pretending to be a lesbian? It's disgusting. Aria is...she's just...she's taken advantage of you and it's wrong and there is no way I'm letting this happen."

"Letting it happen?" Spencer's eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets.

"Whatever." Melissa snapped back.

"And disgusting? Seriously Melissa! So what if I'm gay. A lesbian, so fucking what."

"Mom and Dad will be pissed."

"I'm still their daughter. It's not a big deal."

"We'll see. I'm sure they could find it in their cold hearts to not disown you, but can you really be certain? I'm just happy this is over. You'll get over her. You can start again."

Spencer laughed a hollow laugh at her sisters words and Melissa scowled back at her confusedly before climbing in her car and pulling away speedily.

Spencer got back in hers and started the engine. Before she put it into drive, she quickly made a call.

xoxo


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18:

Note: Nearly there...thanks to those that are still reading and those few of you that have supported me with your comments and reviews. It helps keep me going and I really can't say thank you enough. Lots of updates this week as I need to get this wrapped up.

xoxo

Chapter 18:

xoxo

Spencer didn't have to wait long for her call to be answered, it had barely rung when she heard it connect.

"Did they buy it?" Aria's voice filled her ears and she shut her eyes at the sound of it. It had been hard, she'd played her role and no matter how tired she'd felt just moments before, hearing Aria's voice made it all feel worth it.

"Yes, I think so. I'm pretty convincing, your Mom was...she was..." Spencer tried to control the emotions building inside her. "I...uh...most importantly Melissa bought it."

"I wish it didn't have to be like this." Aria's voice was soft and Spencer knew she was a little broken, neither of them were doing the best job of holding it together, but it didn't matter. They'd done what the needed to. They'd carried out their plan.

"I can't see another way. My sister won't stop. We'll never be free to get on with our lives. Not here. We don't belong in Rosewood, so yes, what we agreed makes sense. So long as we get to be together, that's what matters. They'll come around in time. They will."

"I don't think so." Aria sighed heavily on the other end of the line. Her parents asked a high price sometimes. Not seeing Spencer was too much. She couldn't do it. Even if they'd made certain Melissa couldn't blackmail her Dad. Even if they'd convinced Spencer's parents that they were in love and their relationship was true. It would never be enough. Her parents had made their position clear and it was a good enough reason to leave like this. They'd never accept her and Spencer and she didn't need them watching, questioning, trying to separate them. She chose Spencer. This was the only way.

"Then it'll surprise you that your Mom followed me out? She gave me something and said she knows what I mean to you. She was really sweet and hugged me and god Aria, she cares. She does. I know it."

"What did she give you?" Aria's asked urgently and Spencer wished she was there now, holding her.

"Your new number and address. She wrote it down and told me to call. Told me not to give up on you, not to give up on us. Then Melissa appeared and she sadly sad goodbye. You have to talk to her. Not today, but once we're settled. We can work it out and..."

"Wow." Aria gasped after a moments pause.

"I know! So maybe one day it'll all come good? We're not cutting them off, we're just cutting them out, for now. Only for the now." Spencer nodded to herself as she sat in her car. It was just for now. She hoped one day they could return and return together, but it felt like a long way off and she hated that it had to be this way. She hated that it would hurt Aria the most.

"Until then we have each other." Aria cut the silence and Spencer could tell there was a smile behind those words.

"We do." She grinned back stupidly.

"I'm glad Emily and Hanna know though, but do you really think Hanna can keep quiet?"

"Emily is on her way to my house right now, fully equipped for the big break up routine. She knows exactly what to do and can't wait to play Melissa at her own game. To be honest I think it's the perfect distraction for her."

"And Hanna?"

"Has never let me down. She can be blunt, she's honest, but always, above all else, she's a good friend. Either way Melissa doesn't pay her much attention, so even if she tells the truth it'll be okay."

"Melissa is a bitch."

"That's brand new information." Spencer laughed and Aria joined in.

"I don't know how I'm going to get through the next few weeks?"

"Skype and I'm visiting. We can do this Aria. If it's what we both want."

"I know, I really do and I really want it. I can't wait to see you."

"I love you."

"I love you, but are you sure about this? Really?" Spencer could hear the wobble in Aria's voice. It didn't seem to matter how many times she told her.

"Never more so. Watch out Ms Montgomery. I'm coming to get you." Spencer ended the call and allowed herself to smile for a few minutes before slipping back into her part and sulkily entering the Hastings home.

xoxo

"I do wish you'd cheer up." Veronica sighed listlessly less than a month later. Spencer had been walking around the house in a daze for what seemed like forever, but this last week she'd pulled out all the stops and it was working, everyone knew something was wrong.

Melissa couldn't be more happy. Her Mom of course had no idea of the events that had led up to today. She didn't know Spencer was happy. That she had finally got her girlfriend back, nor could she ever know.

Spencer and Aria had talked it all out that day. It hadn't been simple, but they agreed. Putting on a small show for Melissa was easy. The scenes that followed at the Montgomery's house was a little harder, but it worked. They'd talked and talked, trying to work out how to handle it. Maybe their parents would be supportive? Maybe Spencer's would get Melissa to back down, but Aria and Spencer both knew Melissa wouldn't stop. So they hatched a lie and it all made sense. It made sense because it was the only way they could be together. They didn't want to wait for the dust to settle, didn't want to find out if their families had their backs. They didn't need that. They just needed each other.

Lying was tiring though and Spencer was feeling it. She'd seen Aria twice since they'd parted that morning. Emily had been the perfect best friend. Melissa had bought into all the tears and dramatics, so Spencer going away for a few days hadn't been questioned at all. In fact Melissa had been supportive, suggesting it would do her good when her Dad had raised some concerns.

When she'd returned it wasn't hard to play the role of a heartbroken girl. She missed Aria so much already and the days she crossed off on her calendar were not passing fast enough.

"Mom?" Spencer hesitated for a moment before climbing the stairs.

"Yes."

"What if I fell in love and everyone kept saying it was wrong, but to me it felt so right and made me complete and what if that person loved me back for just being me?"

"Does this person have a name?" Her Mom looked at her curiously, but realized she wasn't going to get an answer. "Do they treat you well?"

"Better than you could imagine."

"So long as they're not wanted for violent crimes and/or have a sketchy history then I'm sure I could be happy for you." She sat down on the couch and motioned for Spencer to join her. "you want to tell me who it is? What's had you acting this way?"

"I can't"

"He's not married is he?" Her Mom was a picture of concern and Spencer wondered what other scenarios she could come up with before she fell upon the right one.

"No. Not married."

"So, why if this person is so amazing have you been walking around like the world is ending?"

"Because other people are trying to stop us being together and I don't think they'll ever stop. In fact I'm sure they won't and we can't keep fighting everyone around us, it's too hard."

Veronica sat there for a moment, before looking at her daughter. "Well, you shouldn't let them. Not if its what you both feel. No one will be able to stop you, I'm sure of that much."

"And if this person was a woman?" Spencer added nervously. Waiting for her Mom to process but she didn't have to wait long.

"Then you wouldn't have to hide from me." Veronica smiled reassuringly.

"Thanks Mom."

"That's it? I don't even get a hug?"

Spencer fell into her Mom's arms and held on tight for a moment. Wishing she could tell her everything, but she was scared. She was scared Melissa was right and scared that when they knew it was Aria that she loved that it'd be too much. Her Mom's small acceptance tonight was more than she could hope for, so she took it and held it close. She had a feeling it'd be all she'd have for the next few years.

"Yeah, I'm going to pack." She sniffed, pulling away.

"You're really leaving? You don't start for another week?"

They'd had this conversation a few times now, but it was all set. Her Dad was ready, but her Mom was still in denial about her impending departure.

"I know, but it's...I just need to go now. Staying here another week, waiting..."

"You want me to help?"

"It's ok."

"I don't want you to go, you know that right?"

"Really?" Spencer wanted to hear this. She needed it.

"You're my baby. So no. I'm going to miss you so much, everyday. Every single day." Her Mom's eyes glazed over for a moment before she looked back at Spencer. "When you were little and for a while it was just you and me. Those were the best days. My favorite days and that'll never change. You've grown and become the woman I always hoped you'd be. I'm proud of you Spencer and I love you and I will miss you so much." Veronica tried to stop herself from crying and Spencer felt more loved than ever in that moment.

"I'll miss you too." She managed, but her voice cracked a little.

"I hope this girl loves you half as much as I do." Veronica smiled through her tears.

"I think she does."

"She better take care of you." Veronica pulled Spencer into another hug and she wondered why her birthday ones always felt awkward. Her Mom gave really good hugs and she now had something else she was going to miss.

"I love you Mom." Spencer pulled away and tried not to cry as she packed the last of her possessions. She would miss home, but she was more than ready for her future.

xoxo

Spencer had quickly checked out her room on campus, but it was less than half an hour later that she was on her way across the city. Aria had been here a week already, settling into the apartment she'd be renting and getting herself set for the new term. Spencer's heart beat a little faster as she climbed the steps and sought out the key Aria had given her. She fumbled with the unfamiliar lock for a moment before letting herself in.

"Hello." She called out as the door creaked open. She'd half expected Aria to be cooking or music to be playing, but instead it was dark and silent. She stepped inside, her hand searching out the light switch. She could see that Aria had been here. Boxes had been opened, but not tidied away. It'd be a while before she was settled of course. Spencer's room had been left in a similar state. She couldn't wait to be here, but now she was left wondering why Aria wasn't here waiting. This had been arranged. Aria knew she was coming and Spencer hadn't even bothered to text to say she was on her way. She checked her cell, but no message from Aria. Instead of calling she decided to explore the place a little.

She took a moment to absorb the fact they'd be here together. Sure, she had a room on campus, it would be strange not to, but Aria had given her a key and this is where they could be together. Somewhere they could maybe make into a home.

It was probably too soon to be thinking that way and she knew it, but they'd been through so much and neither wanted to waste any more time. They didn't need to. They wanted this, they wanted to be together and they'd had to make some hard choices to get here.

Her Dad would arrive with a van tomorrow and she'd be back at campus waiting for him, but tonight was for her and Aria and they'd both been looking forward to it for weeks.

Checking the fridge she was pleased to find that Aria had at least been shopping, but now she had no idea why she wasn't here.

She kicked the bedroom door open and dragged her bag inside. It was then she knew she wasn't alone. Turning, she saw Aria on the bed watching her. Candle light flickered over her body and Spencer stopped still.

"I've been waiting."

"You have?" she gulped. Aria was wearing next to nothing and thoughts were becoming impossible.

"For too long. Far too long." Aria's voice was deep, slightly husky and laden with a desire that made Spencer's core ache.

"I'm sorry. My Mom got talking and the traffic was bad and..." She stumbled over her words. Not really sure why she was trying to talk at all.

Aria slid off the bed and walked slowly towards Spencer, swishing her hips seductively as she moved. "And now it begins." Aria's voice was breathy and Spencer knew she was already wet before Aria's lips met her neck.

"Fuck." She groaned as Aria yanked at her hips, pulling them closer.

"Yep." Aria smirked. "Now you're all mine."

"I always was." Spencer replied, but her words were lost in a passion that neither could control.

Aria's lips moved slowly, teasingly against her skin and Spencer wondered if she could survive this onslaught. She'd ached for this touch and now Aria was indulging in every motion, each connection, every kiss and Spencer was aching more than she thought possible. She needed Aria to complete her, but nothing ever felt like it was close enough.

As if Aria could read her thoughts, those lips were now pressing soft kisses along her inner thigh, like a path had been marked to their final destination. Spencer bucked her hips and Aria quickly pinned her back down onto the bed. "I want you." She growled and Spencer quivered at the sound of those words. They meant something different this time and they also said everything.

Spencer didn't hold back when Aria's lips finally met her centre. A skilled tongue running across her wet folds, making her head fall back against the pillow as she tried to push back, she craved the pressure, she need more.

Aria's fingers danced across her skin tantalizingly and then finally she knew the moment was near. Aria's thumb rubbed across her clit and at the same instance her tongue was deep inside. Spencer cried out her name before biting down on her bottom lip. Rocking her hips to the rhythm Aria dictated. Slow at first. Painfully slow, but if she tried to pick up the pace Aria would stop and she knew she didn't have the control here.

A coil tightened in her stomach, building to an intense fire that burned through her skin as it threatened to unravel. She could have sworn she felt Aria's lips curl into a smile, but that thought was soon forgotten as Aria's tongue delved deeper, curling into a spot that made her want to scream. Her orgasm ripped through her body, unleashing wave after wave of ecstasy as Aria's tongue continued it's ministrations, she came completely undone. Her girlfriends name forever on her lips.

"You okay?" Aria teased as she lay down beside her, letting her fingers idly dance across Spencer's sensitive skin.

"More than. You're beautiful." Spencer whispered, finding the bed a little too comfy, her body relaxing into the sheets. She could feel a wave of tiredness wash over her and it was hard to fight it.

"You can sleep." Aria curled into her side. "You should sleep. It was a long day. It's been a crazy year." Aria yawned at the thought of it. What they'd been through had been beyond epic.

"But we're here now." Spencer shifted a little so she could just see Aria's face. "We're here. It was all worth it."

"I hope so."

"I know so."

"I know too, I do. It's weird. I never thought I'd miss my Mom and love her so much all at the same time."

"You want to go home or something?" Spencer prodded but she already knew the answer and before she could say it was a joke Aria had straddled her waist, her lips seeking out her mouth and Spencer surrendered again. Sleep could wait. This was their time and she wasn't going to waste a minute of it. It had been a long journey and none of it had been smooth, but now she had Aria in her arms and she wasn't letting go.


	19. Chapter 19

xoxo

Epilogue:

xoxo

A year passed and then another and Aria couldn't have asked for more. It wasn't all smooth, their lives never would be. Sometimes they fell out, but they never gave up. Aria had vowed not to give up, she'd promised to fight and if it meant they'd spend the whole night talking it out then that is what they'd do. It worked. They worked. The bad times were few and for that she was grateful.

The good times were better than good, they were amazing. What they had was intense and it didn't seem to be about to change any time soon, but she didn't want it to anyway. Sparks flew in arguments and in passion. Sometimes she had to stop herself and think. It was easy to get lost in how she felt and she had to remember to get up and go to work some days no matter how tempted she was to just stay home. She loved Spencer more now than she did when they left and that feeling only kept growing. Spencer was busy, she was always studying and Aria could only feel pride when she saw how hard her girlfriend worked. There were late nights and when exams came around Aria felt like she was invisible, but she could live with that. It was easy. Spencer had a dream and a real chance to make it.

The first summer together she'd tried to tempt Spencer with a European vacation. One she paid for, but Spencer refused. The money was to go back to Byron and soon after that debt was finally repaid. It was the right thing to do, she knew it too, but one day they'd take that trip and she couldn't wait for Spencer to graduate and for there to be no more excuses.

xoxo

It was past midnight and Aria was sat up in bed, a collection of papers in front of her. Her students had submitted written accounts of their project plans and she had a lot to read. She much preferred grading their pieces, but this was part of the job and she really did love her job now and all that it entailed. She exhibited some of her own work and it had been met with a reasonable amount of enthusiasm, but she wasn't foolish enough to hope it'd be enough to pay the bills any time soon. Spencer was still studying hard, except right now she was sleeping peacefully next to Aria. She pushed the papers aside and watched her girlfriend for a moment. She could never get enough of Spencer, never would. Spencer stirred and slowly opened her eyes.

"Hey you." She smiled sleepily.

"You're beautiful." Aria sighed.

"And you're still working." Spencer shifted so that she was sat up against the pillows.

"I'm done. Go back to sleep."

"No." Spencer grinned mischievously. "I'm awake now and seriously you look so hot in those glasses. Professor Montgomery for the win."

"Spencer!" Aria pretended to chastise her girlfriend, but couldn't help but peer at her seductively over her glasses.

"Tell me off all you want, tonight I'm feeling like a bad girl. Really bad."

"Oh god." Aria good barely speak, Spencer's lips were already moving across her stomach. Intense was not a good enough word to describe what they had, it never would be when Spencer kissed her like that.

xoxo

Another year passed, Aria was aware that it was almost three years since she'd left her house in Rosewood after the fight with her parents, she knew the date exactly, but she pretended that it didn't matter.

Thanks to Spencer she'd kept in contact with her Mom. Each week Spencer had made sure she called, that they talked and even encouraged visits. Aria had acted like it didn't matter, but it did and she couldn't thank her girlfriend enough for pushing. Sometimes she needed to be pushed and they both knew it.

After a time, a bridge had been built, one that she hoped would stay strong. Her Dad barely said a word when they spoke on the phone. The day she'd settled her debt he'd thanked her and wished her well and she'd been tempted to tell him then, tell him that she was happy, that her mistakes hadn't ruined her chance, but life was good and she wasn't willing to change it. Not for the sake of gloating.

The apartment she shared with Spencer was bright and airy and there was enough space for a studio for her to paint. She still taught. It didn't just pay the bills anymore, she loved it.

Spencer had settled into college and it just all seemed to work somehow. They fitted and it worked.

Today they were returning to Rosewood. Spencer had been back several times alone. It had been hard the first few times. A week or two apart wasn't what either wanted, but really it came down to the fact that one could return to the family home whilst the other was left alone in their apartment.

After her second year at college Spencer had confided in her Mom and Aria knew that had set off a string of events that she'd never expected to fall into place. Veronica and Ella became firm friends practically overnight and today was a culmination of their plotting and scheming, for which she would be eternally grateful. Tonight they would all be sharing a meal together under the same roof, Montgomery and Hasting's as one.

Aria had to stifle a grin when she saw how uncomfortable her Dad looked when they arrived, but when his eyes shone the moment he saw Aria, he quickly moved across the room and wrapped his arms around her.

"It's good to see you." He whispered as he kissed her head softly.

"Stop hogging our daughter." Ella practically pushed him aside as she hugged Aria, before turning to Spencer and hugging her too. "It's...I'm just so..." Ella didn't fight her tears.

"Mom." Aria tried to stop her.

"I love you both." Ella finally finished, doing her best to stop and not cause a scene.

Before they could talk further a little boy ran into the room and disturbed the reunion.

"Is that?" Aria turned to Spencer and Spencer nodded. "He's gorgeous." Aria looked at the boy for a second before taking Spencer's hand and gripping it tightly. They both sucked in a deep breath in preparation for what they were about to face.

"What's with all the cars? I had to park over ten feet away." Melissa grumbled as she entered the house. Unaware of her audience.

"The walk will do you good." Veronica rolled her eyes. "You've put on a couple of pounds."

"I've had a baby!" Melissa took the bait.

"Two years ago." Her Mom cut in.

"Mom." Melissa whined and then she looked up and saw four faces watching her. "what the hell?" her eyes locked with Aria's immediately and no one in the room could miss the venom. "What is she doing in my house?" she spat, looking back at Veronica for answers.

"It's my house." Veronica corrected her eldest daughter. "and Aria is a guest."

"You can't be serious."

"Oh, I am. Spencer's girlfriend is always welcome here. You don't like it? You leave."

"So you know? You know what she did? You know and you're okay with it?" Melissa was on the attack and all Aria could do was hold Spencer's hand a little tighter. She had no idea how to fight this.

"They love each other. Spencer is happy. The past has been put to rest. So deal with it or you can leave. I mean that." Veronica stared her daughter down for a moment, making sure the message was clear.

"Fine." Melissa huffed "Just don't expect me to be nice."

"Oh dear, we never expect you to be nice." Veronica chided, looking towards her guests in mock amusement and Aria had to stifle a laugh.

"What have I missed?" Ezra burst into the room, his arms laden with Melissa's bags.

"Just about everything...as usual..." Veronica offered him a glass of wine and he quickly discarded the bags. "You'll need this. Melissa is a bit touchy."

"See it's not so bad." Spencer whispered as she nudged Aria in the ribs.

"It's pretty much perfect." Aria replied, retaking Spencer's hand and entwining their fingers. Her eyes on the little boy that played around them oblivious.

"You want one of those?" Spencer grinned mischievously.

"One day."

"Me too." Spencer squeezed Aria's hand tightly. "when I'm qualified and...you know."

"We'll know when." Aria nodded.

"Yeah." Spencer was a little doe eyed at the thought of them having a family together. "I think I should show you my room."

"You do?" Aria looked at her strangely, she knew where Spencer's room was. "Oh you do?" she caught on the moment she saw that look in Spencer's eye.

"I really do." Spencer tugged at her arm and quickly led her up the stairs. Pushing her back into the door the moment they got inside and pressing their lips together in a heated kiss.

The homecoming was complete and the future was there to take. Neither could have been happier than in that moment. Every decision and sacrifice mattered. Now their families knew, all the pressure, secrets and doubts were gone. For the first time since they'd got together they were really free and nothing could ever feel better.

xoxo

The End.

xoxo

Authors Note:

Thank you for reading and to those that stuck with this as I posted. I've enjoyed the journey, hope you did too. Sparia is a small ship, but I think it's pretty awesome.

I think this could be my last multi-chapter fanfic. It's taken five months for me to write and similar for the one before and this one has taken over my free time a little too much. It's been a year since I started out as Martha's pen. This story was different to what I've done before. A little more personal and a little more draining I suppose.

So it's a goodbye for now and wishing you all good luck in 2013. Thanks again and always x


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